Who told you that you couldn't make mistakes? That you had to hold your emotions in? That being a good parent meant putting yourself last? That you couldn't trust people? That looking a certain way was necessary to be attractive?

And perhaps the bigger question: Do you still believe it?

In this episode of Pleasure & Pain, Tameika and Dawn take a deeply personal look at the core beliefs they've carried into adulthood and the experiences that helped create them. Using a core-beliefs assessment as a starting point, the two explore how much of what we believe about ourselves, our relationships, parenting, success, money, appearance, trust, and even joy can be traced back to what we experienced, observed, and absorbed growing up.

The conversation gets honest about perfectionism, punishment, shame, emotional restraint, the pressure placed on mothers to sacrifice their own happiness, and the expectations women can inherit around appearance and relationships. But it also explores the other side of the equation: how beliefs can evolve, how difficult experiences can sometimes produce unexpected strengths, and how we can consciously decide what we want to carry into the next generation.

It's a conversation about childhood, but ultimately it's about adulthood.

Because sometimes the most important question isn't "Why am I like this?"

It's:"Who told me this was the way I had to be?"

Chapters:

0:00 Welcome to Pleasure & Pain

3:55 What's New? Life Updates & A Little Internet Drama

12:44 Who Told You That?! Confronting Our Core Beliefs

16:49 The Beliefs We Learn as Children

24:02 Shame, Discipline & Perfectionism

29:55 "Delay the Joy" & The Pressure on Mothers

36:00 Relationships, Roles & What We Expect From Our Partners

47:51 Can Our Core Beliefs Change?

48:29 Attraction, Appearance & "A Mind at Work"

55:59 "You Can't Trust Anyone"

58:21 Vulnerability, Receiving & Letting People In

1:01:03 What Our Beliefs Mean for the Next Generation

1:04:23 And I Quote...

1:07:49 Would You Rather?

1:10:49 Get Us to Oprah & Final Thoughts

What started as a way to connect with friends has become one of the most influential forces shaping our relationships, self-worth, shopping habits, and even the way we experience everyday life.

In Episode 3 of Pleasure & Pain, Tameika and Dawn unpack the evolution of social media and ask an important question:

Are we using social media... or is social media using us?

From filters and followers to algorithms and online shopping, this conversation explores how the digital world has quietly reshaped our identities, our mental health, our relationships, and the choices we make every day.

Together, they discuss:

• The original purpose of social media—and how it has evolved

• The impact of comparison on confidence and self-esteem

• How curated lives influence our relationships

• Why "TikTok has become the store"

• Consumerism and impulse buying

• Raising children in a world driven by influencers

• News consumption and learning to verify information

• Building healthy boundaries with technology

Plus:

• Pleasure & Pain Moments

• Punchbowl

• The greatest song lyrics of all time

Whether you're an avid content creator, an occasional scroller, or someone trying to create a healthier relationship with technology, this episode offers thoughtful insights into one of the defining forces of modern life.

Chapters:

0:00 Welcome to Pleasure & Pain

1:10 What's New?

5:14 Pleasure & Pain Moments

9:42 Everybody's Watching

11:18 How Social Media Changed Everything

17:46 Filters, Validation & Self-Esteem

25:07 Are We Posting... or Performing?

32:50 Relationships in the Social Media Era

40:26 TikTok Has Become the Store

47:38 Raising Kids in an Influencer World

54:18 Can You Trust What You See Online?

59:33 Punchbowl

1:01:20 Greatest Song Lyrics of All Time

1:06:18 Get Us to Oprah

1:07:14 Final Thoughts

What if the best relationship advice isn't about finding the right person?

What if it's about becoming the right version of yourself first?

In Episode 2 of Pleasure & Pain, Tameika and Dawn dive into the realities of modern dating, personal growth, healing, and the unexpected ways life introduces us to people who challenge our assumptions.

Tameika shares the story behind meeting the man she affectionately refers to as "9PM"—a chance encounter sparked by a memorable scent, a fitted baseball cap, and a moment that would eventually become much more than either of them anticipated.

But this conversation goes far deeper than a meet-cute.

Together, Tameika and Dawn explore how dating has changed over the years, the importance of understanding your own emotional patterns, and why healing old wounds can transform the way we approach relationships.

The discussion touches on abandonment wounds, resilience, cultural differences, relationship expectations, and the freedom that comes from no longer looking for someone to complete you.

Whether you're dating, married, divorced, happily single, or somewhere in between, this episode is a reminder that the healthiest relationships often begin when you stop searching for someone to rescue you and start enjoying the life you've already built.

Chapters:

0:00 Welcome to Pleasure & Pain

0:23 What's New? Life Updates & Reading Glasses

2:03 Pleasure & Pain Moments

6:25 Today's Topic: Dating

8:45 Dating Then vs. Dating Now

15:23 What We Really Want in Relationships

20:29 The Evolution of Dating

25:20 Dating With Purpose

28:31 Cologne, Baseball Caps & The Story of Meeting Him

34:02 Relationship Patterns & Emotional Wounds

41:47 Healing, Growth & Self-Awareness

47:30 Building Relationships from Wholeness

50:01 Punchbowl

50:37 What Movie Can You Recite Word-for-Word?

52:58 If You Could Live Inside Any Movie...

58:44 Lessons to My Younger Self

59:44 Shoutout to The Ruff Media Group

1:00:34 The "Get Us to Oprah" Campaign

1:01:13 Follow, Subscribe & Share

1:01:35 Closing Thoughts