In this episode we get spooky as Jonathan plots garden revenge on his ex, we whisper to our dearly departed plants via an online Ouija Board, and divine the mysteries of the dormant season with tarot. Plus, we spotlight pumpkin-- the berry you've probably never eaten. Jeannette digs into the haunted history of the jack-o-lantern (even if carving one still kinda sucks).

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Jonathan complains about tiny melons and Jeannette has to decide which plant can fulfill her needs in F-M-K Plant Edition. We explore Witch Hazel and where it got its demonic name. Jeannette reveals one of her vintage new age books and we continue to personify plants with the zodiac.

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Our latest episode kicks off Spooky season and includes an uncomfortable conversation with an arborist. Jonathan brags about his nonna's smuggled plums from the old country. We read terrifying Garden Tea sent in by a listener and pronounce all the medicinal compounds in American Skullcap perfectly on the first try ☠️

Correction: Jonathan said cinquefoil in reference to bunch berry (cornus canadensis) but he meant quatre-temp. Mes excuses les plus sincères.

Visit Astro.com for your free natal chart.

Information from this episode comes from: https://www.gaiaherbs.com/blogs/seeds-of-knowledge/american-chinese-skullcap-what-s-the-difference https://www.gaiaherbs.com/blogs/herbs/american-skullcap

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In this episode Jonathan talks about the origins of the mulberry nursery rhyme and Jeannette finds out if it's a bush or a tree... Jonathan's pretty beans are a hit at happy hour and we read some devastating Garden Tea.

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We relax with lavender, and talk about the different types and tips on growing your own. A new segment debuts! Fuck, Marry, Kill: Plant Edition. Take a peek at the connections between lavender, Jonathan and Jeannette’s astro birth charts.

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Jeannette heads to agricultural bootcamp, Jonathan drags GMO propaganda, and a chewed-up bird sparks a hawk-related identity crisis. Meanwhile, primrose struts onto the scene kinky, poly, and radiating pure femme energy.

Note: the book on botany referred to is in fact 'A Gardeners Guide to Botany'.

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Roses are red, but the history is unsurprisingly gay. Jeannette contemplates opening up her marriage (mainly to get out of doing dishes), while Jonathan reveals that not all thorns are created equal - every rose just has its prickle.

We dig up the potentially queer-coded roots of Salem’s garden history, including Elizabeth Lord and Edith Schryver: pioneering women in landscape architecture... or just very good friends? Plus: wartime rose protection tactics, botanical sex sprays gone wrong, and the lingering haunt of rose energy in the bedroom.

Sources: 🌹 Portland Parks – International Rose Test Garden 🌿 The Lord & Schryver Conservancy

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Jeannette has a vendetta against a tree. Meanwhile, Jonathan unearths a painful truth: sometimes slugs aren’t just destroying your hostas… they’re also wrecking your relationship. This week’s plant spotlight is Bloodroot - a spring beauty with a dark side, including a shady stint as a darling of the anti-vaxx crowd. Who knew this innocent woodland bloom had so much baggage?

Email us with your Garden Tea at plantslutspod@gmail.com! Instagram Tiktok

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