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We explore how to tell normal aging from early signs of dementia during holiday gatherings, using practical examples and clear comparisons. We share stories from our families, outline next steps for testing, and point you to resources that make hard talks easier.

• memory loss that disrupts daily life vs recalling later
• planning and problem solving decline beyond simple errors
• getting lost on familiar routes and inside stores
• confusion about dates, seasons, and future plans
• vision and spatial changes that affect driving and balance
• language gaps, menu anxiety, and repeated stories
• misplacing items and inability to retrace steps
• poor judgment with money and self-care
• social withdrawal and loss of hobbies
• mood and personality changes tied to overwhelm
• how to rule out UTIs, depression, and diabetes
• why early evaluation and resources matter
• using Alzheimer’s Association tools and checklists
• starting compassionate, concrete conversations at home

You can always reach me at my email, which is L-I-S-M-A-R-93 at yahoo.com

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I would love to hear from you. Send me questions or comments.

Support the show

I would love to hear from you. Send me questions or comments.

Support the show

I would love to hear from you. Send me questions or comments.

Support the show

I would love to hear from you. Send me questions or comments.

Support the show

I would love to hear from you. Send me questions or comments.

The moment when you realize your parent is getting lost in familiar places marks the beginning of a different kind of grief. For those with loved ones experiencing early onset Alzheimer's – dementia that begins before age 65 – this journey starts much sooner than expected.

Drawing from my personal experience with my mother, who began showing symptoms in her mid-60s but wasn't diagnosed until much later, I explore the unique challenges of early onset Alzheimer's. Unlike the typical cases affecting those in their late 70s or 80s, this form strikes approximately 200,000 Americans earlier in life, accounting for about 3% of all Alzheimer's cases. The disease progresses more aggressively in younger patients, yet presents with symptoms that are often missed or misattributed to stress, depression, or normal aging.

Through my mother's story, I share the subtle warning signs we missed – her sudden refusal to drive, blaming it on disliking a new car; her reluctance to shop independently; her inability to follow simple television plots. These weren't just normal forgetfulness but manifestations of a brain changing far too soon. Early onset patients often experience unusual symptoms beyond memory loss, including difficulties processing visual information, recognizing faces (even of spouses and children), and significant declines in language, writing, and executive functioning skills. Perhaps most heartbreaking is that these patients typically maintain good physical health while experiencing profound cognitive decline – my mother remained mobile without assistance despite advanced dementia, surprising even her hospice nurses.

If you're caring for someone with dementia or noticing concerning changes in a loved one, please reach out through comments or my upcoming Instagram page. Share your experiences, suggest topics you'd like covered, or simply connect with others walking this difficult path. Together, we can navigate the complex journey of caregiving, memory loss, and the grief that comes when someone we love begins to forget.

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What happens when someone you love starts seeing people who aren't there? For dementia caregivers, this moment can be jarring, confusing, and even frightening. But as I discovered during my mother's journey with dementia, these hallucinations can sometimes bring unexpected comfort.

When my mom first began seeing a little girl with red hair, I recognized she was connecting with her cousin who had died at age 11. Later, she spoke with her brother who had passed just a year before—someone we deliberately never told her had died to spare her from repeatedly experiencing that grief. Rather than correcting her, I asked questions and joined her reality. "What are they saying?" I'd ask, or "Isn't it nice they came to visit?" This approach preserved her dignity and the comfort these connections brought her.

Before assuming hallucinations are simply symptoms of advancing dementia, caregivers should consult healthcare providers to rule out urinary tract infections, medication side effects, or other physical causes. Once medical issues are addressed, the key challenge becomes how to respond compassionately. Rather than arguing about what's "real," successful approaches include validating feelings, offering reassurance, redirecting attention if needed, and making environmental modifications like improving lighting or covering mirrors that might trigger confusing reflections.

For many with dementia, seeing departed loved ones isn't frightening—it's comforting. My mother found peace in these connections, and that brought me peace too. By entering her world rather than demanding she enter mine, we created moments of genuine connection despite the progression of her illness. Perhaps the greatest lesson dementia teaches us is to be present in the moment, just as our loved ones are forced to be. Years later, I'm grateful for the times I set aside my need to correct and simply joined my mother where she was.

If you're navigating this complex journey of caregiving, know you're not alone. Sometimes the most profound gift we can give is simply meeting our loved ones in their reality, whatever that might be today.

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The emotional toll of caring for a loved one with dementia can be overwhelming, but finding moments of joy, laughter, and connection might just save your sanity. Author Brenda Prater-Sellers joins us to share her deeply personal journey of caring for her mother through ten years of dementia - a challenge she describes as more difficult than climbing Mount Everest or jumping from planes.

With disarming honesty and warmth, Brenda reveals how her "sweet, timid Christian mother" underwent dramatic personality changes, and the strategies that helped her navigate this challenging terrain. Rather than constantly correcting her mother (which often led to agitation), Brenda learned to enter her mother's reality, discovering five specific approaches that brought comfort: scenic drives, ice cream treats, story reading, classic TV shows, and receiving mail.

The conversation takes a practical turn as Brenda shares crucial time management strategies that allowed her to balance caregiving with running multiple businesses and maintaining her own mental health. "If you don't schedule time for yourself, your day is going to be gone before you know it," she advises fellow caregivers. Her ingenious approach of asking her mother for help with simple tasks rather than telling her what to do resonates with caregiving experts everywhere.

Perhaps most powerfully, Brenda discusses choosing laughter over tears when facing difficult behaviors. "I just had to laugh. Otherwise, you're so sad that this happened." This philosophy not only preserved her wellbeing but created unexpected moments of connection with her mother.

Brenda's experiences formed the foundation of her book "You Slept When? Calamities of a Clumsy Businesswoman," which has raised over $50,000 for Alzheimer's Tennessee and other nonprofits. Whether you're currently caring for someone with dementia or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers both practical strategies and emotional comfort for the journey ahead.

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