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Tara McCausland shares the final Q&A from the April 2026 SAL 12 Step Conference and announces registration for the 2026 SA Lifeline Women’s Workshop (September 18–19 in Mapleton, Utah). Panelists discuss how addicts can own harm by listening, staying regulated, and doing shame work, often with therapeutic support. They address sitting with discomfort through sponsor help, prayer, and “pendulation,” and clarify surrender as active trust in a higher power rather than apathy. Steven distinguishes lapse (timely honesty and accountability) from relapse (secrecy and misrepresentation). The panel notes limited women-specific addiction groups and recommends SA plus qualified therapy. Betrayed partners are urged to disclose to safe people (often group, sponsors, therapists), set boundaries, and focus on their own recovery when disclosure feels incomplete. They cover defensiveness, step four challenges, deepening connection with God, reframing holidays and anniversaries after discovery, and the importance of sponsorship, humility, and ongoing meetings to heal individuals and families.

Register for the S.A. Lifeline Women's Workshop HERE.

02:32 How to Own the Harm
04:22 Sitting With Discomfort
06:35 Pendulation and Regulation
08:04 Surrender Without Apathy
10:42 Lapse vs Relapse
14:27 Women and Addiction Resources
16:01 Safe Disclosure and Support
20:37 Step Four Balanced Inventory
22:22 When Disclosure Feels Incomplete
25:41 Honesty After a Lapse
27:20 Holding Space Not Fixing
27:58 Defensiveness And Regulation
30:39 Working Steps With Sponsor
34:18 Reframing Holidays After D Day
38:03 Anniversaries And Honest Disclosure
42:27 Connecting With the God of Your Understanding
46:53 Why Step Four Feels Brutal
50:47 Closing Hope And Keep Coming

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Host Tara McCausland shares presentations from the 2026 SAL 12-Step Conference starting with two personal shares from SAL 12-Steppers Brandon P. and Bing H. Brandon P., a recovering sex addict, describes decades of secrecy and shame, hitting rock bottom two years earlier, and learning that turning to God is a daily decision sustained by grace and community. Bing H. shares her experience with betrayal trauma including disorientation, triggers, and despair, and explains how SAL 12-Step, therapy, sponsors, and surrender brought hope, emotional grounding, and a desire to break generational cycles. Next, you will hear a Healing Couples presentation from Heather and Justin B. which focuses on healing the marriage, focusing on one’s own healing, the messiness of recovery, and placing God at the center. Using the SAL Circle Models, they contrast the drama triangle with healthier patterns and explain how to rebuild trust and connection over time. They highlight boundaries as “if/then” statements and emphasize that they are self-protective actions rather than walls, and stress ongoing step work, prayer, support, and taking action on spiritual promptings.

View the S.A. Lifeline Circle Models HERE.

Register for the 2026 Women's Workshop HERE.

Support the show

SA Lifeline Foundation
SAL 12 Step
Find an SAL12Step Meeting
Donate
Contact to ask questions or make comments
Transcripts

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Therapist and 12-stepper Josh Walpole shares his personal history with pornography and sexual addiction, and how recovery led him to become a therapist at Circles of Grace (formerly Lifestar). He explores how stories shape recovery, contrasts lying with acceptance and radical honesty, and connects the hero’s journey and redemption arcs to change. He outlines 12-step themes, therapeutic recovery elements, nervous-system regulation and “recognize, respect, regulate, re-story,” and emphasizes sponsorship and hope that recovery is real and possible.

Apply to become a volunteer S.A. Lifeline Ambassador

00:00 Welcome and Keynote Intro
02:26 Meet Josh Walpole
04:13 Buffalo Storm Metaphor
06:09 Why Stories Matter
08:30 Josh's Recovery Story
14:34 Lies to Radical Honesty
19:24 Hero's Journey in Recovery
25:29 Villains and Redemption Arcs
30:08 Pivot Moments and Rock Bottom
33:16 Founders Stories and Pain
38:20 Twelve Steps as a Story
41:19 Therapy Roadmap to Healing
46:19 Brain and Nervous System Stories
51:12 Closing Stories and Sponsorship
55:39 Recovery Is Possible

Support the show

SA Lifeline Foundation
SAL 12 Step
Find an SAL12Step Meeting
Donate
Contact to ask questions or make comments
Transcripts