As the new year comes,

each day is a new kind of

dilemma, as my heart

begins to think about

whether certain things

would begin from where

I left or whether something

new will surprise me,

honestly, it gives me a lot of

anxiety because firstly I wasn't

even ready to leave things behind,

and to accept alternatives that

were enforced upon me without my will,

and secondly, it is really scary

to begin with something new.

Hope July brings you happiness:)

And then they pretend to

move on by filling out the

emotional gaps in their life,

in place of my absence

with the presence of

someone new whom

they barely know,

they will still be reminded

of the ways i gave them

attention without even

calling them mine.

I choose myself today,

not over you,

I can never do that

and you know that well,

I just chose the new me

over my past self.

Stop waiting for them.

I am not losing myself

in the crowd,

I am just waiting long enough

to be found.

this time I will be found

smiling with hope,

a hope that would be

stabilising me...

for a very long period,

lifting my strength

and patience,

until my prayers

are heard.

I should have chosen

my happiness more boldly,

but i chose to stay with

your sadness,

if this feeling of longingness

doesn't make you see love,

then i can't help you make

understand...

what you deserve.