As your host gets ready to depart for a month-long "Talented Mr. Ripley" style vacation in Italy, Clyde Griffiths is attempting to play his own long con. The boy is on the witness stand lying through his teeth about the events that led to the death of one Roberta Alden. Will a jury of farmers see through the obfuscations, half-truths, and outright mendacity???

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At long last, we've learned the defense strategy to extricate young Master Griffiths - a claim of physical and moral cowardice. What?! Seems dumb as hell to your host, but who can say?

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As Clyde's trial continues apace, Clyde takes the stand to speak on behalf of his own self. It's a terrible gamble for the defense, as DA Mason must surely be licking his lupine lips at the prospect of chomping down on Clyde's obvious lies and prevarications. Before that cross-examination can occur, however, we're going to be treated to tale cooked up by Belknap and Jephson. Will it succeed?!?

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Torment begins today's episode. A discussion of soft foods leads off today's episode before we pick up Belknap's opening argument on the trial of one Clyde Griffiths, late of Lycurgus, NY, whose very life hangs in the balance. We are yet to hear the crux of the defense; how will they endeavor to spare this young murderer's life?

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Your rambling host details, for no discernible reason, his weeklong schedule (pronounced: sh-edule). He then moves on to using the word "nadir," which is pretentious. Just a terrible waste of time from your host before we get back to the matter at hand, the trial of one Clyde Griffiths.

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The trial continues with much desolation accruing on the part of one Clyde Griffiths, as witness after witness corroborates the accusations of DA Orville B. Mason. A veritable parade of witnesses - one after the other - condemning Clyde to his forthcoming date with Ol' Sparky. Mr. Griffith's hopes are now flagging by the moment, which leads your host to conclude that we're in for some kind of twist.

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Witness after witness condemning Clyde to Ol' Sparky. Dots are being connected, red yarn tied to thumbtacks, evidence uncovered! They even found the druggist to whom Clyde applied for abortifacient! They found everybody! How the heck does Clyde have any hope of walking after this litany of concerned citizens putting the screws to the young Mr. Griffiths.

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The case is underway! Jury selection complete. Opening argument argued. And now, at long last, witnesses are taking the stand. What will they say? Will they sink Clyde's case? PLUS a lesson in antiquity. AND a new nickname for Robert is REVEALED!!!

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