On this leg of Changing Spaces (Through the Lens) I drive from Cambridge to Norfolk after a Windsor/London/Greenwich loop—and discover the hardest part of travel isn’t always routes or weather. It’s friendship dynamics: energy, boundaries, assumptions, and how quickly deeper patterns surface when you share tight spaces and shifting plans.

This isn’t just a travel vlog. It’s a journey through landscapes, history, psychology, spirit, and identity—from castles and river buses to caravan nights and flooded roads. We’ll unpack themes like psychic load (invisible labour), assumptions vs generosity, avoidance vs clarity, energy economy, masking vs authenticity, value clashes, boundaries in action, and discernment for who to travel with (and how).

Who this helps: solo travellers, vanlifers, mid-life changers, anyone renegotiating friendship/relationship dynamics or recovering from burnout.

Journal prompts

• Where do I carry the invisible load (planning, booking, cooking, mediating)?

• What drains me vs. restores me on trips? How can I protect my energy economy?

• Which values are clashing (e.g., freedom/flow vs. control/avoidance)?

• One boundary I’ll communicate before the next trip is…

If this resonates, like & subscribe for more episodes on heritage, identity, psychology and slow travel.

00:00 Intro & why this isn’t “just” travel
01:20 Series route recap: Windsor → London → Greenwich → Cambridge
01:59 New leg: Cambridge → Norfolk (weather, van issues, flooded routes)
03:55 The lens: TV’s “Race Across the World” & what it reveals
06:54 Theme 1: Psychic load in friendships (default organiser)
08:55 Theme 2: Assumptions vs generosity (transactions vs open giving)
10:58 Theme 3: Avoidance & hints vs directness (drama triangle)
13:15 Theme 4: Energy economy (what it costs to tolerate drains)
16:10 Theme 5: Masking → authenticity (speaking needs early)
17:40 Theme 6: Value clashes (freedom/flow/shared responsibility)
19:55 Theme 7: Boundaries in action (small acts of self-respect)
22:30 Theme 8: Discernment—who’s a good match to travel with?
24:30 Takeaways, journal prompts & invitation to reflect

Timestamps / Chapters#ChangingSpaces #VanlifeUK #SoloFemaleTravel #FriendshipDynamics #Boundaries #EmotionalLabor #Psychology #UKRoadTrip #Cambridge #Norfolk #EnergyEconomy #SlowTravel

As i continue to explore heritage Identity and how our past and present influence us , dreams turn into reality ...This trip has been filled with delight challenges and a growing resilience to the uncertainty of what going on the road can bring . This episode explores my arrival in The Isle if Bute Scotland , as part of my latest campervan adventures and what unfolded in a way I could never have anticipated and how our identity past and present is shaped .#bute #isleofbute vanlife #scotland #travelvlog #islands #familiy #culture #heritage #sycronicity #ancestry #womanslives #mentalhealth #spirituality #wellbeing #love #relashionships #UK #campervan #solofemail #lovetotravel #tourism #photograpthy #digitalart

Welcome to Changing Spaces, where I share insights on psychology, spirituality, and wellbeing for navigating life’s shifts.

In this episode, I explore the transition from summer to autumn — a season many find difficult due to shorter days, colder nights, and seasonal affective disorder (SAD).

If you’ve ever noticed your mood dip at this time of year, you’re not alone. I’ll guide you through 10 powerful tips and rituals to reframe autumn as a season of renewal, including:
✨ Morning rituals to boost energy and mood
✨ Breathwork, mindfulness, and quantum breathing
✨ Maximising daylight and movement
✨ Creating cozy evening rituals
✨ Practicing gratitude and connecting with others

This is about building your personal toolkit so you can find light in new places, restore balance, and thrive through autumn and winter.

💡 What helps you during this seasonal shift? Share in the comments — I’d love to hear from you.

👉 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and check out my Change, Grow, and Transform series for more tools and inspiration.

#AutumnWellbeing #ChangingSpaces #BeatTheBlues #SeasonalAffectiveDisorder #MindfulLiving #SpiritualJourney #AnxietySupport #DepressionHelp #AutumnSelfCare #ChangingSeasons

In this episode of Changing Spaces, I return to the Isle of Bute—my mother’s birthplace—for the first time since childhood. What began as a simple campervan journey quickly turned into an emotional homecoming filled with synchronicity, unexpected meetings, and stories long hidden within my family’s past.

From driving onto the ferry with a racing heart to finding myself welcomed by islanders who remembered my nan, my uncle, and even family secrets once kept quiet, this was more than travel—it was reconciliation. I discovered what it means to be a Brandane, connected with extraordinary people like Billy and Bobby, and began weaving together the threads of ancestry, identity, and belonging.

This is not just a story about Scotland, but about how place, memory, and people awaken something within us. If you’ve ever revisited your roots or wondered what it means to belong, this episode will speak to you.

#ChangingSpaces #IsleOfBute #HeritageJourney #FamilyStories #ScottishRoots #CampervanLife #Ancestry #Belonging #HiddenStories #EmotionalJourney

Isle of Bute podcast, Scotland ancestry stories, campervan journey UK, reconnecting with heritage, Brandane meaning, Scottish roots identity, family history podcast, Changing Spaces podcast, emotional travel stories, belonging and ancestry Scotland

Hi, this is Mel Gabbi, and welcome back to Changing Spaces. Today I want to talk about something we all experience at some point: friendships, boundaries, and what happens when our peace gets disrupted.

The Story
I’ve just started my journey up to Scotland, but it began with a few days in London with a friend visiting from America. We did some great things together — Windsor Castle, the Tower of London, a river bus to Greenwich, and wandering through markets. On the surface, it was fun and exciting.

But underneath, I found myself exhausted. Carrying bags across London, late nights, noise when I needed quiet, I realised how different our rhythms are.

The Reflection
What I noticed is this: friendships that work well for a few hours over lunch don’t always work when you’re together 24/7. And that’s not because the friendship is broken — it’s because our values clash when tested under pressure.

And this is where I see echoes of something bigger. History has always been about power and negotiation — from feudal lords and peasants, to workers and wages, to citizens and politics. In friendships, it’s about who sets the tone, who adapts, and who holds the space for freedom.

The Lesson
I realised I don’t want to carry other people’s avoidance, sulking, or passive anger.

And maybe you’ve felt that too. Maybe you’ve had a friendship where you suddenly feel like the parent, or the organiser, or the one giving more than you receive. Maybe you’ve noticed that when your peace is disrupted, your energy, creativity, and joy start to disappear.

The Takeaway
So here’s the heart of it: true friendship honours values, boundaries, and freedom.

And sometimes, the most powerful choice is to create space — not because we don’t care, but because we care about staying true to ourselves.
So if you’ve ever travelled with a friend, or even just had them stay with you, and felt your peace disrupted — know that you’re not alone.

Thanks for listening, and I’ll see you in the next episode of Changing Spaces.

Changing Spaces – Through The Lens, is where I explore campervan travel, heritage journeys, psychology, spirituality, and the freedom to create new stories at midlife. From 30-day transformation programs to travel reflections, this channel is about how changing spaces changes lives. A new series my on-the-road exploration of how places hold memory.

I travel by campervan, sometimes staying in nice cottages, hotels and caravans , and film what I see, and reflect on the conversations I have and explore the layers beneath the landscape—such as the local industry, migration, uprisings, class, and the quieter stories written into stone, coastlines, and communities

St Hild was deeply connected to York and Canterbury through the Synod of Whitby (664). Here’s how it fits:

• At that time, the Celtic Church (rooted in Irish/Scottish traditions, especially from Iona and Lindisfarne) celebrated Easter on one date, following their own calendar.

• The Roman Church, centred in Canterbury (linked to Rome itself), celebrated Easter on a different date.

• This wasn’t just about the calendar — it symbolised two different traditions of Christianity in Britain.

Hild gathered church leaders and scholars together at Whitby Abbey, which she led, to settle the issue. This was remarkable because:

1. She presided over the council as host and abbess, creating the conditions for dialogue.

2. She held space for men of huge authority — bishops, kings, and scholars — to debate in her abbey.

3. Ultimately, the decision went with the Roman calculation of Easter, bringing unity with Canterbury and Rome, which gave the English church consistency and authority.

So yes — Whitby Abbey became the place where the church aligned, and Hild was at the centre of it.

✨ From a Changing Spaces perspective, this is:

• A woman leading not just a monastery but a moment of transition for an entire nation’s faith.

• The tension between local tradition (Celtic) and wider conformity (Roman).

• Her abbey as a meeting ground — a container for reconciliation and decision-making.

  
  

  listen in for my experience of this unfurling information

Welcome to Changing Spaces —.This isn’t just travel—it’s a reconciliation with identity, faith and family inheritance. Cathedrals, coastlines, and the stories we carry.In this episode I go deeper into identity, religion, and inheritance. I share my story of growing up between worlds (Scottish roots, Dutch/Irish/Italian threads), school assemblies shaped by Christianity, a mother who left organized religion but kept a deep spirituality, and how that shaped my search for belonging.Along the road—through abbeys, museums, coastlines—I’m exploring how history shapes who we are today: St Hild and Whitby Abbey, York Minster, synods, Catholic vs Protestant echoes, class and working-class life, and the hidden family stories we carry. This is pilgrimage and reconciliation as much as travel.🔔 If this resonates, please like & subscribe on my you tube page , to also see videos of the lovely spaces I visit . Please also share your own story of identity and belonging in the comments.In this video:What “Changing Spaces” really is (beyond travel)Mixed heritage & growing up between culturesReligion, spirituality & family silenceCathedrals/abbeys as mirrors for inner lifeHow personal + political histories intertwine#ChangingSpaces #Identity #Belonging #MixedHeritage #SpiritualJourney #ReligionAndCulture #WhitbyAbbey #YorkMinster #UKHistory #TravelWithMeaning #Psychology #FamilyStories