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Vulnerability is everywhere!

It’s on social media, in self-help books, on Ted talks, discussed in countless therapy rooms.

Vulnerability can be extremely confusing, especially for us blokes!

In this episode Howard and Ryan unpack it all for you.

• What does vulnerability really mean?
• Why is it often mistaken for weakness?
• How it can actually be a source of strength.?
• Can vulnerability be transformative?
• How does it make a difference to your mental health and relationship?
• When does it simply not work?

If you’ve ever wondered whether opening up is worth the risk, or is vulnerability really all that necessary this conversation is for you.

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Book An Appointment Here

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

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In this episode, Howard shares his personal journey from a stoic British upbringing to becoming a therapist who specialises in men's emotional health.

He reflects on:

• His early emotional struggles
• The impact of cultural norms on his mental health
• His path to self-discovery and emotional wellbeing

Howard delves into his therapeutic practices and how they helped him become more authentic and self-compassionate.

The conversation also explores:

• The importance of finding a therapist who resonates on a human level
• How therapy can serve as a safe space for emotional exploration and growth

This episode is a candid and insightful look into the personal and professional journey of a therapist, offering a compelling case for the transformative power of therapy.

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Book An Appointment Here

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

INSTAGRAM

FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

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Is true friendship a cornerstone of emotional wellbeing?

Friendships that offers support, belonging and genuine connection.

If so:

Why are so many men in Australia and beyond quietly battling loneliness and isolation?

• How do male friendships change over time?
• What does it takes to move past surface-level banter and build friendships that matter?

You are invited join Ryan and I in conversation as we unpack the power of authentic male friendships.

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations in Australia.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

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FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

TRANSCRIPT

Speaker A: Is true friendship a cornerstone of emotional well being? You know, friendships that offer support,
belonging and a genuine connection? And if so, why are so many blokes in Australia and in fact around the world quietly battling loneliness and isolation?
How do male friendships change over time? And what does it take to move past that surface level banter and build friendships that matter?
You are invited to join Ryan and I in conversation as we unpack the power of authentic male friendships. Welcome to Man Talk, a podcast of real conversations about life, your life,
our life, the emotional well being of men. My name is Howard Todd Collins. I'm the director of Men and Relationships Counseling, a private counseling practice here in sunny Melbourne, Australia.
Thank you for being here. Sit back and relax and join me and my very good friend Ryan for this latest episode of Men Talk.
Today we're, we're talking about friendship and men.
I did a bit of research on what Beyond Blue has been talking about in terms of the statistics for blokes around friendship. According to BeyondBlue, 25% of Aussie blokes have nobody outside of their family or their partner that they can call upon or rely upon.
And in the same research, some of the men who do have lots of friends,
97% agree that having mates is a good thing, it's essential.
And out of that,
87% of men in that context struggle with to actually make the time to catch up with mates.
And it's a theme that comes up in my conversations with men about feeling isolated and lonely and realizing that maybe their priorities of making friendships or staying connected with mates somehow gets dismissed or pushed down the priority list and it leads to all sorts of problems for blokes, the isolation of men,
depression, anxiety and so on. That's part of the research.
But I guess in some way I wonder a bit about what is it about men and friendships that you know about in your life that are useful for us to be thinking about and feeling our way through.
In the conversation today,
what do you reckon?

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There are too many blokes who are way too hard on themselves.

In this episode I’m going to break down the myth that self-compassion is soft, weak, self pity or even selfish.

• What does Self-Compassion really mean?
• What are the skills?
• Why is it so hard for some men?
• How can it actually make you stronger—not softer.

If this episode raises your interest to work on Self Compassion and you need get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations in Australia.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

INSTAGRAM

FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

TRANSCRIPT

Speaker A: Are you kind to yourself? Do you practice self compassion?

Now, as a man, you may well feel the pressure to always be strong,

independent and self sufficient. For a lot of blokes, the idea of being kind to themselves sounds a bit, well, fluffy or wishy washy in some way. Maybe you picture bubble baths or scented candles or incense sticks or just slacking off for the day, but self compassion is actually about treating yourself with the same respect and understanding you would offer a good friend.

There are too many blokes who are way too hard on themselves.

So I'm going to break down the myth that self compassion is soft or weak.

It's not self pity and it's not even being selfish.

So what does self compassion actually mean? What are the skills? Why is it so hard for some men? And how can it actually make you stronger,

not softer? Welcome to Mentalk, a podcast of real conversations about life, your life, our life,

and the emotional well being of men. My name is Howard Todd Collins. I'm the director of Men and Relationships Counseling. Let's talk about what it really means to be a kinder and stronger man in today's world,

starting by how you treat yourself.

Thank you for being there. Sit back and relax and join me for this latest episode of Men Talk.

Good morning, good evening, good afternoon.

I think I've covered all bases but in the wrong order. I hope you're well, wherever you're, wherever you're listening to me from.

This is a solo episode. The last couple of episodes have been a conversation with a co host with my good friend Ryan. We've been talking about a few things,

so if you've missed those last couple of episodes, there are conversations or co hosted, please go back and have a look at them and have a listen. But this is just me on my own today and we're going to be covering something that I think is really common for blokes in particular,

but also for lots of women and couples that I meet who kind of get in their own way.

Do you ever find yourself being just too hard on yourself or even other people?

Are you like many blokes who for

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Why would you want to sit with uncomfortable feelings?

A reasonable question!

In this latest conversation Ryan and Howard discuss:

• What does sitting with feelings even mean and what stops most of us?
• The impact of avoiding our emotions
• Some practical ideas of how to sit with feelings
• The value of finding a ritual or a practice and seeking support

This episode delves into the complexities of men's emotional experiences.

Through personal anecdotes, we emphasise the importance of recognising and addressing emotions rather than avoiding them, highlighting how communication and emotional awareness can improve mental well-being and relationships.

If you want to grab the Free Guide "Better Conversations for Blokes" - Quick and Simple ways to Communicate with Your Partner click here

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

INSTAGRAM

FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations in Australia.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

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In this engaging and thought provoking conversation, the first co-hosted Man Talk episode, Howard and Ryan unpack what Men's Work is all about.

They share some of their experiences of Men's Groups and broader themes of Men's Work today including:

• What is Men’s Work? Where does it originate?
• What are some of the core concepts of Men’s Work?
• Our personal experiences of men’s work: What’s the point? Why put yourself through it?
• What are some of the contemporary Issues in Men's Work today?
• Why is Men’s Work so important? What are the benefits?

Resources:

Books

• No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover: A guide for men to break free from people-pleasing tendencies and embrace authenticity.
• Iron John: A Book About Men by Robert Bly: A classic exploration of masculinity and personal growth.
• The Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman
• The Four Agreements – by Don Miguel Ruiz
• King, Warrior, Magician, Lover by Robert Moore

Blogs

The Man Talk Blog: Offers insights and tips on relationships, emotional well-being, and personal growth.

The Good Men Project: A platform for men to share stories and explore modern masculinity.

Support Groups and Communities

Mankind Project: A global network of men’s groups focused on personal development and emotional intelligence.

Evryman: Facilitates men’s groups and retreats to foster emotional connection and growth.

For more about my co-host check him out - RyanSpanger.com.

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

INSTAGRAM

FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations in Australia.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Download Your Free Guide - Better Conversations for Blokes - Quick and Simple Ways to Communicate With Your Partner

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If you push down your feelings and tell yourself to 'man up,' 'she’ll be righ't and keep going on with life, what happens?

Bottling your emotions will make you more confused, more frustrated, disconnected from your partner, your kids, your friends, yourself!

Despite telling yourself you’re fine, this internalising leaves you carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders.

If you find yourself bottling your emotions this episode is for you.

We’re breaking down how suppressing your feelings leads to cycles of stress, conflict in your relationship, and even harm your mental health.

We’ll talk about how opening up doesn’t make you weak – it makes you stronger, more present and more connected.

I share 6 Tips to get you started!

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

INSTAGRAM

FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations in Australia.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Download Your Free Guide - Better Conversations for Blokes - Quick and Simple Ways to Communicate With Your Partner

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If communication is the foundation of connection how come relationships can feel distant, strained and disconnected?

What are you not talking about with your partner?

You know those times when:

• You want to share how you’re feeling, but you don’t know where to start, so you stay silent.
• Your partner brings up an issue, and instead of addressing it, you either shut down or get defensive.
• You feel like no matter what you say, it’s taken the wrong way, so you avoid the conversation altogether.
• Or maybe you’ve tried to open up, but it feels awkward, and you’re not sure if you’re doing it ‘right.’

In this episode we discuss how you can change this, have better conversations and deepen the connection in your relationship

Do you want to learn more ways to improve your relationship skills?

Check out our Online Mini Course:

'From Shut Down to Communication - 4 Relationship Boosting Strategies for Men'

Follow us + Join the Conversation

INSTAGRAM

FACEBOOK

www.menandrelationships.com.au

Contact us - howard@menandrelationships.com.au

If this episode raises a need to get some counselling support Howard is available for consultations in Australia.

Check out his private practice:

Men and Relationships Counselling

Or reach out to a professional in your area.

Download Your Free Guide - Better Conversations for Blokes - Quick and Simple Ways to Communicate With Your Partner