欢迎参加2026年的家庭系统排列工作坊：
📩 学员反馈和报名链接：https://hipsy.nl/meeei

这一集，我带你走进 Mark Wolynn 的《It Didn’t Start With You | 这不是从你开始的》这本书中。我们会一起理解：为什么有些痛、一些恐惧、一些反复出现的模式，怎么努力都摆脱不了。答案也许并不在“你不够好”，而是在你所承载的家庭记忆里。

它可能不是从你开始的，但是，疗愈可以从你开始。

你会听到什么
1.作者的真实故事：当“答案不在外面，而在回家与父母和解”
2.用表观遗传学（epigenetics）做一个容易懂的切入：创伤不仅在心理，也可能在身体里留下痕迹，并影响下一代
3.核心语言地图 Core Language Map 的四个入口：
•核心抱怨：你最常反复抱怨什么
•核心形容词：想到父母时浮现的三个词
•核心句子：你内心深处那句挥之不去的话
•核心创伤：失去、分离、贫穷、暴力、被排除、羞耻等
4.我自己的第一次家排经历
5.两个真实来访案例：
6.我参加的一场男性居多的家排工作坊：看见强者背后的脆弱与眼泪，也让我对身边的男性产生更深的理解与温柔

线下工作坊邀请（荷兰 Soest）
为第一代与第二代华人设计的系统工作坊，连接中国的根，找到飞翔的翅膀。

•2 月 14 日 14:00–17:00 中文
•4 月 11 日 10:00–16:30 荷兰语
•5 月 9 日 14:00–17:00 中文
•6 月 20 日 10:00–16:30 英文 LIP 生命整合历程

In this episode, I invite you to step into Mark Wolynn’s book It Didn’t Start With You. Together, we explore why certain pains, fears, and recurring patterns can feel impossible to shake, no matter how hard we try. The answer may not be that “you’re not good enough,” but that you are carrying family memories that live on through generations.

And please remember this: it may not have started with you, but healing can start with you.

What you’ll hear in this episode
1.The author’s real-life story: when “the answer isn’t out there, but in going home and making peace with your parents.”
2.A simple, accessible introduction to epigenetics: how trauma may leave traces not only in the mind, but also in the body, and can influence the next generation.
3.The four entry points of the Core Language Map:
oCore Complaint: what you find yourself repeatedly complaining about
oCore Descriptors: three words that arise when you think of your parents
oCore Sentence: the one sentence that keeps echoing in your inner world
oCore Trauma: themes such as loss, separation, poverty, violence, exclusion, shame, and more
4.My own first experience with family constellations
5.Two real client stories
6.A family constellations workshop I attended with mostly male participants: witnessing the vulnerability and tears behind “strength,” and how it helped me hold the men around me with deeper understanding and tenderness

In-person workshop invitation (Soest, the Netherlands)
Systemic workshops designed especially for first- and second-generation Chinese people — reconnect with your Chinese roots and find your wings.
Registration and details: https://hipsy.nl/meeei
•14 Feb 14:00–17:00 | Facilitated in Chinese
•11 Apr 10:00–16:30 | Facilitated in Dutch
•9 May 14:00–17:00 | Facilitated in Chinese
•20 Jun 10:00–16:30 | English LIP Life Integration Process Workshop

欢迎参加2026年的家庭系统排列工作坊：
📩 报名链接：https://hipsy.nl/meeei

在这期播客中，我在中断了八个星期之后，第一次重新坐下来，和你分享我生命中一段极其真实、脆弱，却也充满爱与领悟的旅程。

一场意外的受伤、一台并不顺利的手术，让我经历了持续的疼痛、无力与失控，也让我不得不完全依赖他人生活。而正是在这样的低谷里，我重新看见了什么才是真正重要的：被滋养过的关系、在脆弱中依然愿意留下来的人、以及此刻本身的生命。

在这一集中，我与你分享三个深刻的领悟：

🌿 领悟一：停止等待，生命从此刻开始
当我们不再把希望全部投向“明天会更好”，而是学习回到当下，与此刻共处，痛苦不一定消失，但它不再遮蔽整个生命。

🌿 领悟二：每一个挑战，都是一封成长的邀请函
身体的康复，也是心理、情绪与精神的修复。人生中的每一次低谷，都在邀请我们学习新的能力，这些能力会陪伴我们一生。

🌿 领悟三：爱，在脆弱中最显深刻
在完全依赖中，我深刻体会到亲密关系真正的力量：不是浪漫，而是在你最无力的时候，依然像战友一样并肩作战。这是一段需要被持续滋养的生命中极其珍贵的关系。

如果你正经历身体的、关系的，或内心的挑战，希望这一集能带给你陪伴、理解与一点点光。

In this episode, after an eight-week pause, I sit down again to share a deeply real and vulnerable chapter of my life—one that is also filled with love, insight, and quiet transformation.

An unexpected injury and a surgery that did not go smoothly brought weeks of ongoing pain, weakness, and a loss of control. I had to rely entirely on others for daily life. And it was precisely in this low point that I began to see more clearly what truly matters: relationships that have been lovingly nurtured, people who are willing to stay when we are most vulnerable, and life as it unfolds in this very moment.

In this episode, I share three core insights from this journey:

🌿 Insight One: Stop Waiting — Life Begins Now
When we stop placing all our hope in “tomorrow will be better” and learn to return to the present moment, pain may not disappear—but it no longer overshadows our entire life.

🌿 Insight Two: Every Challenge Is an Invitation to Grow
Physical recovery is also emotional, psychological, and spiritual healing. Every low point in life invites us to develop new capacities—skills that can support us for a lifetime.

🌿 Insight Three: Love Reveals Itself Most Clearly in Vulnerability
Through complete dependence, I experienced the true strength of intimate relationships—not romance, but the willingness to stand side by side like lifelong allies when one of us is at our weakest. This is a relationship that deserves conscious care and ongoing nourishment.

If you are navigating challenges of the body, relationships, or your inner world, I hope this episode offers you companionship, understanding, and a gentle light along the way.

欢迎参加2026年的家庭系统排列工作坊：
📩 报名链接：https://hipsy.nl/meeei

在这一集中，我迎来了一个值得庆祝的时刻：
我的第55集播客。

55，不只是一个数字。
它代表的是——
55 次敞开心扉的勇气，
55 次与生命对话的深刻时刻，
55 步朝向梦想中的自己迈出的脚步。

在这一路的创作中，我收获了四个最珍贵的领悟：

1. 找到你的“为什么”——那盏永不熄灭的内心之灯

播客没有即时回报，完全靠内心的召唤。
我的“为什么”来自走过家庭黑夜、走向光明后的愿望：
愿我的声音，能陪伴哪怕一个正在经历黑暗的人。

2. 享受过程——找到滋养你的创作方式

从“不写稿直接录”到重新拥抱写作，我发现：
愉悦感，是坚持的秘密。
写作不仅帮助我表达，也成为未来书稿和社交媒体的宝贵素材。

3. 记录，而不是创造（Document, don’t create）

我从 Gary Vaynerchuk 那里学到：
生活本身，就是最好的素材。
每周的“活出梦想中的自己”反思播客，
让我和听众一起透过日常的起伏，看见生命的意义。

4. 播客，是最强大的学习方式之一

要分享得清晰，我必须先理解得深入。
写脚本、查资料、举例子…
这个过程让我的成长扎扎实实地扎根。

🎧 这一集，送给你、也送给你心里那个小小的声音：
“我也想讲我的故事…”

你不需要完全准备好。
你不需要完美。
你只需要迈出第一小步。

因为你的声音，一定会触动某一个正在等待你的人。

愿你，
用属于你的方式发光。
愿你的故事，在世界某个角落生根发芽。
愿我们，一起活出梦想中的自己。

In this episode, I celebrate a meaningful milestone:
Episode 55.

55 is not just a number.
It represents—
55 moments of opening my heart,
55 honest reflections,
55 steps toward becoming the dream version of myself.

Along this journey, I learned four precious lessons that changed me:

1. Find Your WHY — the inner flame that keeps burning

Podcasting takes time and brings no instant rewards.
My WHY comes from walking through darkness with my family
and discovering that sharing my voice may bring light to someone going through their own long night.

2. Enjoy the process — in your own unique way

I returned to writing because it nourishes me deeply.
Many podcast notes became book chapters or social posts.
Joy is what sustains long-term creation.

3. Document, don’t create

A teaching from Gary Vaynerchuk that transformed my approach.
Life itself carries all the stories we need —
our struggles, breakthroughs, human moments.
Since May, my weekly reflection episodes have become
a meaningful ritual of grounding, connection, and inner clarity.

4. Podcasting is one of the most powerful ways to learn

To teach clearly, I must understand deeply.
Scripting, researching, and connecting concepts to life
has become one of my greatest sources of growth.

🎧 This episode is a gentle invitation to anyone who dreams of sharing their voice:
You don’t need to be perfect.
You don’t need the full plan.
You only need the courage to begin.

Because somewhere out there,
someone is waiting for your story —
a story only you can tell.

May you shine in your own way.
May your stories take root in the world.
May we continue walking this journey together —
living as the dream versions of ourselves.