『Love Thy Neighbor Show』のカバーアート

Love Thy Neighbor Show

Love Thy Neighbor Show

著者： Tom Vann Dan Dennis and Colette Fehr
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Love Thy Neighbor is a straight-talk relationship show from Tom Vann, Dan Dennis, and licensed therapist Colette J. Fehr - born the day Colette knocked on their door and they realized they were literal next-door neighbors. Together, they bring 50 years of broadcasting (Dan 30, Tom 20) and 15 years of clinical counseling (Colette), plus real-life reps: Tom's 20-year marriage, Dan's 15-year marriage, and Colette's second, thriving chapter. Expect humor, empathy, and practical advice from both sides of the wall. New episodes every Thursday, wherever you get your podcasts.2025 個人的成功 心理学 心理学・心の健康 自己啓発 衛生・健康的な生活
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  • LTN 51 - Colette Not Cool Kids

    LTN 51 - Colette Not Cool Kids
    2026/10/21
    Love Thy Neighbor: Episode Notes Episode: 51 Hosts: Tom Vann, Colette Fehr, Dan Dennis | Guest: None Sponsors / Ad Reads My Eternal Vitality: Sponsor ad read for MyEternalVitality.com. Segment Rundown Cold open: the apology. Dan nearly flubs the intro, then Tom apologizes to Colette for "ditching" her at a recent comedy show. They describe the familiar party move where you bring a new friend and then drift off with your old friends. The comedy show seating saga. The hosts walk through the night. A table had been reserved through Krista and Miles for Tom, Dan, Colette, Kentucky Steve and Tom's wife. Then they ran into old radio friends, including Jimmy (Jim Colbert, teased for his Tony Soprano linen look) and Jack. The group went in through the VIP entrance, which Tom and Dan both say they didn't want to do, and grew to a party of ten. The two leftover seats ended up away from the main table. Dan offered to sit there alone, but Colette and Steve took them, putting them in what the hosts call the "timeout corner." Steve was happy as long as he had a beer. Colette's take: no drama. Colette says no apology was needed. She quickly read the situation, didn't care, and would have said something if it bothered her. She jokes about being kept off the "cool kids table" and says Dan offering to sit alone was ridiculous. Dan defends that he really did want to sit alone. Host anxiety and event stress. The talk turns to why hosting stresses people out. Tom says he can't enjoy his own parties because he worries whether everyone is having fun, and says his wife is even worse. Dan explains that event season, with long calls with Tracy to cover every detail, weighs on him because he blames himself if anything goes wrong. Colette relates it to her book launch, where worrying about turnout and food took away from her own enjoyment. Colette's advice: letting go. Colette says anxious "worrier" types are often wired this way, but you can move toward more emotional freedom. Her tips: stay conscious of the pattern, remind yourself you can tolerate other people's disappointment, and remember you aren't responsible for everyone. Dan separates unreasonable complaints, like grumbling about lines at a free beer fest, from real dropped balls, like promising gift bags and not delivering. Colette agrees. Running bit: Tom mixing up "consternation" and "constipation." Elizabeth Holmes film: first take. Colette gives her review of the much-talked-about Elizabeth Holmes film from Lance Oppenheim and Nathan Fielder, which the guys also covered on Monday's ACT show. She argues it isn't really a documentary but an artistic think piece. The hosts mention a news report that Oppenheim is facing questions about using other people's footage without permission, and Crespo's recommendation of the film. The premise and Holmes's motive. Colette lays out the setup. Holmes invited the crew in one month after giving birth to her second child and 34 days before reporting to prison, and Fielder lived in the house with the family. Colette sees it as a carefully built rehabilitation effort and a launchpad for "Theranos 2.0," which the film shows. The pitch is that Holmes is a misunderstood, neurodivergent Silicon Valley visionary. The hosts compare it to tech "vaporware" hype. What the movie leaves out. Colette says the film skips the facts. She points viewers to John Carreyrou's book Bad Blood, the earlier HBO documentary, and Hulu's The Dropout. She describes Holmes's habit of dodging questions with word salad and calls it manipulation. She notes that therapists can't diagnose someone who isn't their patient. Then she goes through the documented harm: false pregnancy and cancer results, machines that didn't work, results quietly run on other companies' equipment, and employees who were threatened when they raised concerns. Neurodivergence explained. Tom asks what "neurodivergent" actually means. Colette explains it as a brain that works a little differently, with ADHD and autism spectrum disorder (which now includes what used to be called Asperger's) as examples. She stresses it isn't a negative label. The hosts talk about Holmes's unblinking, intense eye contact. Colette explains why sustained eye contact reads as dominating, and wonders whether Holmes and Fielder are both neurodivergent in some way. Layers of manipulation. Colette calls the movie fascinating and well made. Part of what makes it compelling is watching Fielder get pulled in and come to care about Holmes. Her Insights from the Couch co-host Laura even said she thought they might kiss. Colette sees several layers: the filmmakers shaping the story, Holmes working on Fielder, and the audience being moved by both. She also reads it as a commentary on being watched in the social media age. Trauma vs. accountability. Colette brings up Holmes's account of past trauma and her claims that former partner and co-defendant Sunny Balwani groomed and abused her. Some therapists have responded...
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    50 分
  • LTN 50 - Since You've Birdgone

    LTN 50 - Since You've Birdgone
    2026/10/15
    Love Thy Neighbor: Episode Notes Hosts: Tom Vann, Colette Fehr, Dan Dennis | Guest: None Sponsors / Ad Reads Central Homes Roofing: Commercial spot (added in post). Segment Rundown Cold open: Combos for dinner. Dan admits that when his daughter's mother is away, dinner is a bag of Combos with a side of salt and vinegar Bugles. The hosts joke that oversharing on the show works as their therapy. Someone adds that pro athletes probably eat Combos for dinner too.Birdgate setup. Dan brings up the Kelly Clarkson "Birdgate" story after seeing Colette's Instagram post about it. The hosts note it's been all over the major outlets, including a hashtag built from her song titles, and agree that making the news doesn't make something important anymore. Colette plugs her Instagram handle.The Art of Play. Colette lays out the facts. Clarkson visited Art of Play, a high-end magic, toy and curiosity shop in Brooklyn co-owned by wealthy partners, one of them an award-winning children's author. The hosts take a side trip into overpriced whimsical wooden toy stores (Winter Park Village, St. George Street in St. Augustine) and tease Clarkson for saying the store looked "rad."The Pretty Woman post. Clarkson posted that staff side-eyed her when she asked about a bird on the wall and treated her like she couldn't afford it, comparing it to the Rodeo Drive scene in Pretty Woman. Her fans piled on, and the store's reply came across as snarky rather than apologetic. The bird is a $15,000 animatronic piece by a Seattle artist. It's one of only two in existence and is fixed to the wall, and the price really refers to commissioning one from the artist.Video and tone-deafness. The surveillance footage shows a short exchange, and the hosts see no body language that looks rude, only Clarkson's frustrated exit. One host calls it tone-deaf to complain publicly about not getting to buy a $15,000 bird while people are struggling. The hosts compare her outfit to the breakdancer Raygun and point out that everyone in the store was dressed casually.Perception is subjective. Colette says everyone filters interactions through their own mood and hurts. She thinks a misunderstanding is more likely, since the bird wasn't really for sale and staff may have pointed her to a cheaper option. She mentions Clarkson's recent leave from her show and her divorce as context for a possible hard day. A host remembers being locked out of a gold shop in Little Vietnam.Punching down. Dan relates to firing off a reaction, and credits Tom with teaching him to "give it a beat." The hosts discuss consequences: employees fear going to work, the store has received threats, and the owner said Clarkson put them in danger. They talk about the responsibility that comes with a huge platform and the ripple effects on staff, contractors and families. Colette wishes Clarkson had asked her fans to back off instead of going silent.Colette's review scars. Colette describes a bad vendor experience around her book launch. When a colleague asked about that company, she gave a measured answer, and he quit two weeks after joining for the same reasons she had. She also tells how a couple who never became clients left her practice one-star Google reviews after she held a boundary, and her rating still hasn't recovered.Fan backlash. Colette's long Birdgate video drew a lot of views and some hate from Clarkson's fans, who number close to 9 million followers.Shane Gillis and SNL. Colette taking her shoes off sets off a foot joke aimed at Tom. The hosts mention BDM show voicemails asking why they didn't comment on Gillis using the word "whore" on SNL. Colette doesn't love the word, but she argues comedians need room to try things and fail, and the audience's groan was the pushback. Another host says Gillis likely planned the joke and ties it to a gym sketch from his own show. They compare it to Jimmy Kimmel and call the all-or-nothing online outrage exhausting.Outrage as distraction. The hosts see celebrity gossip and outrage as a distraction from real life, like any other vice. They note that online communication loses facial expression and nuance and turns into blame, character attacks and tribalism.The relationship lesson. Colette's main point: when our feelings get hurt, we either swallow it and build resentment or lash out with blame. The better path is to pause, ask why it hit so hard, and come forward vulnerably so repair is possible. Tom questions Clarkson's intent: was she trying to buy the bird, or to hurt the store?Taking feedback. Tom explains that Dan is emotional and feels criticism as an attack. Colette plugs her book The Cost of Quiet, says she leans toward people-pleasing, and tells about setting a polite boundary with someone who then attacked her character and used her own book against her. She uses a restaurant-manager example to show that you can't control how people react, even to kind feedback.Don't turn off the faucet. Dan says he and Andrea have worked on this: ...
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    50 分
  • LTN 49 - Kentucky Steve

    LTN 49 - Kentucky Steve
    2026/10/09
    Love Thy Neighbor: Episode Notes Episode: "Kentucky Steve" Hosts: Tom Vann, Colette Fehr, Dan Dennis | Guest: None Sponsors / Ad Reads No sponsor segments or ad reads in this episode. Segment Rundown Cold open: credentials check. The hosts list what qualifies them. One was forklift certified in the early 2000s, one is a Universal Life Church reverend, and Colette has been a licensed relationship therapist for almost 15 years. They joke about their UCF degrees: an interdisciplinary studies degree and a business degree from before the internet. Colette shares that she started as an English and communication double major at Flagler and finished communication at UCF. Getting a reluctant partner to therapy. Listeners have written in about partners who resist couples therapy. The hosts note the stereotype that men are usually the reluctant ones. Tom says he felt that way years ago with Crystal. They have been together 20+ years since they were teenagers, and he worried that going to therapy meant they were headed for divorce. Not all therapy is equal. Colette says some people resist because they had a bad experience before. Couples therapy done by someone without specific training can do harm. She stresses researching therapists and finding one trained to work with two people and two truths at once. How to broach it. Her advice is to be open, honest and vulnerable. Frame therapy around how important the relationship is, ask how your partner feels, offer to do the research, and ask for just one session. She says more men are reaching out to her than when she started, and many tell her it's nothing like they expected. Don't ring the alarm bell. A host admits he tends to treat small problems as emergencies and compares it to a computer crapping out before an edit. The group agrees that urgency triggers divorce fear. The advice is to raise therapy during a calm moment, not mid-fight or as a threat. Fear of being the bad guy. Colette promotes emotionally focused couples therapy (EFT), which is based on attachment science, as the evidence-based gold standard, and says it doesn't take sides. Tom says he expected to face his wife plus "her lawyer." Instead he found a neutral mediator. The hosts joke about him then trying to keep the therapist on his side. Life in waves. Tom says relationships have highs and lows, and the goal is to spend more time in the middle. Therapy can even out the extreme bad stretches. Colette talks about "raw spots" from past wounds and plugs her book The Cost of Quiet. She explains that people tend to pick partners very different from themselves. As a big extrovert, she has almost always ended up with quieter partners. Finding the right fit. Look for specific couples training, ask which model a therapist uses, and make sure both partners click with them. Colette offers listeners referrals if she isn't the right fit. A host says most therapists he contacted readily referred him elsewhere. Colette notes clients often say she was the only one who responded, and says providing referrals is an ethical standard. Role play: "the game's on." A host plays a dismissive husband who refuses therapy, then floats Zoom therapy as a compromise. Colette says she doesn't do consultation calls or meet-and-greets and prefers clients come to her office. She does use Zoom for clients in other parts of the state and through her coaching company. The 11th hour. When a relationship is really struggling, Colette says to get honest without threatening. She cites a stat that over 70% of divorces are initiated by women, rising to about 90% among college-educated women, which gets a joke about college. She describes men who are only ready to work on things after their wife has seen a lawyer. Her point: if a partner asks for therapy, they're still fighting for the relationship. Hard things are valuable. A host is complimented for seeing value in difficult things like workouts and long business hours. The group suggests applying the same reframe to relationships. Enter Kentucky Steve. Colette mentions her husband, who is in his 60s and grew up on a farm in Kentucky, and says he probably wouldn't have done therapy if he hadn't married a therapist. The hosts riff on the character "Kentucky Steve": tractors, quiet coffee on the porch, snapping beans. They declare it the episode name. Busyness as identity. A host brings up a clip from Insights from the Couch about work-life balance and retirement. He relates to staying busy as his whole "dad personality" and admits he doesn't know what "taking care of yourself" means. Colette ties this to "gray divorce." Divorce is down among younger people but rising for those over 50, often after years on autopilot focused on kids and work. Relationships as plants. Colette compares a relationship to a potted plant, or even an orchid, that can't be neglected for decades. There are side jokes about one host loving plants and hating succulents, and Colette admits she has a black ...
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    48 分
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