Welcome back to The Church Resource, where we talk all things helpful for churches, leaders, and laypeople alike. In this episode, Lucas Pinckard and Dr. Chris Respass dive deep into a real and recurring issue in ministry: how to handle a disgruntled church member.

Conflict in church leadership isn't new — but understanding why a member is upset and how to respond with grace and wisdom is critical. This episode, titled "Getting to the Heart of the Issue," explores what's often going on beneath the surface of complaints. Spoiler alert: most of the time, the thing someone is mad about… isn't really the thing they're mad about.

Drawing on real-world ministry experience, conflict mediation insights, and pastoral care principles, Lucas and Dr. Respus unpack:

- Why church members may act out when they feel a loss of control or change in their spiritual environment.

- The importance of recognizing context — such as grief, trauma, or decades of history — behind someone's frustration.

- What it means to check your ego at the door when someone challenges you.

- How to truly listen, not just hear — and how this simple act can de-escalate most tense conversations.

- The value of building relationships with dissenters before conflict even arises.

- Why not every squeaky wheel needs grease — but every person needs grace.

You'll also hear about the concept of the "Holy Desenter" — those individuals who challenge leadership in ways that help the church stay balanced, self-aware, and Spirit-led. These aren't troublemakers; they're sometimes God's instruments for accountability and deeper reflection.

Ministry leaders will be encouraged to remember:

- That not every challenge is a threat.

- That shepherding includes listening, guiding, and even being corrected.

- And that when handled well, difficult conversations can lead to unity, trust, and maturity in the body of Christ.

As always, Lucas and Dr. Respass keep it real, humorous, and incredibly insightful — even sharing a few parenting analogies and three-year-old battles that somehow still apply to church life!

Whether you're a pastor, ministry leader, or active church member, this conversation will equip you with the mindset and tools to better navigate difficult conversations in your community.

Got a topic you'd like us to cover? Email us at: thechurchresource@gmail.com

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