In this new episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast, Elizabeth Goncal joins me to share her personal journey of self-discovery and healing. Her self-discovery started after college, but the root of the issue goes back to childhood, and they realize they need to heal through it. She delves into the internalized societal expectations and their impact on self-perception. She touches on her tendency to seek external validation and people-pleasing behaviors and her realization of abandoning her true self and the impact it had on her life. She recognizes the need to love and be with herself, overcoming the anxiety associated with being alone, and learning to provide self-love and validation.

Overall, this episode emphasizes the importance of self-love, authenticity, and breaking free from patterns of seeking external validation to live a more fulfilling and genuine life.

Key takeaways:

• Discovery of Coaching: After four months, Elizabeth stumbled upon a coach, leading her to realize that her struggles dated back to childhood, prompting her to embark on a healing journey.

• Abandoning the True Self: Elizabeth reflects on a moment when she looked at a childhood photo and cried, realizing how much she had abandoned her true self in relationships, seeking external validation.

• Recognizing the pattern of needing external validation not only in relationships but also in other aspects of life, including her business and the importance of noticing and addressing these patterns.

• The impact of societal pressures, especially from social media, where individuals feel compelled to conform to certain standards, affecting self-perception and behaviors.

• Elizabeth advocates for being gentle with oneself and cultivating self-compassion, highlighting the significance of changing self-talk and treating oneself with kindness.

• The challenges of maintaining authenticity in a society that often promotes conformity and external validation, urging individuals to embrace their true selves.

• Elizabeth emphasizes that patterns in relationships often overlap with patterns in other areas of life, such as work and business, underscoring the interconnectedness of personal development.

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Welcome to another episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast. In today’s episode, Ashley Beeman joins me to talk about her journey from battling addiction and body image issues to achieving personal and professional success, and highlights the transformative power of mindset shifts and self-acceptance. She touches on the ADHD management, body dysmorphia, and the impact of multi-level marketing (MLM) culture on self-perception and the importance of balance, sustainable approaches to health, and the rejection of restrictive ideologies, whether in dieting or other aspects of life. Overall, the emphasis of this episode is on creating a positive, empowered mindset that extends to all aspects of life, including personal development, relationships, and overall well-being.

“I realized that in the anti-diet space, I had just as many rules as I did when I was in the diet culture space. And I remember crying to one of my friends on the phone being like, I just want to order a scale, but I'm not supposed to, I'm not supposed to want to change my body, I'm not supposed to want to do any of that. And she reminded me that, you know, this is your life, actually, you can do what you want. And that's when I started breaking all of the rules. And I found my happy little like, gray area, the magical gray area is what I like to call it. And I went on this journey of just trusting myself, trusting my decisions, and really coming from a space of love and not hate”- Ashley Beeman

Key highlights from this episode:

• Ashley shares her weight loss journey after becoming a mother, discussing the emotional toll, unhealthy practices, and struggles with addiction to Adderall. She emphasizes the turning point when she decided to heal her relationship with herself.

• The shift from the yo-yo diet culture to the anti-diet and body positivity space. While initially liberating, she later realized the presence of restrictive rules in this space as well.

• Breaking free from rigid rules, finding a balanced approach, and embracing the "magical gray area” and the importance of trust, self-love, and decision-making from a positive mindset.

• Discussion on ADHD, her coping mechanisms, and the importance of self-awareness and personalized strategies for managing daily tasks.

• Past struggles, including addiction, withdrawal from Adderall, and the commitment to share her story to help others.

• The conversation transitions to body dysmorphia, with Ashley defining it as perceiving one's body differently from reality. She shares her personal struggle,emphasizing the importance of deep work, self-love, and acceptance.

• The intensification of body dysmorphia to her involvement in multi-level marketing (MLM), where the focus on body transformations for business purposes contributed to negative body image.

• Mindset Shift, moving from detachment to embracing and appreciating her body for its capabilities and the experiences it allows.

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In today’s episode of the Healing and Dealing podcast, Michelle Gordon joined me to talk about her journey as a happy nurse whose mission is to help women take control of their lives, step into their power and rediscover their passion and confidence. She also talks about her experience in overcoming burnout and achieving a healthier, more fulfilling life. She delves into the impact of burnout on physical and mental health and the importance of solitude and self-reflection, shifts in perspective, embracing emotions, and making lifestyle changes. Michelle's story highlights the transformative power of reconnecting with one's values, engaging in self-care, rebuilding relationships, and ultimately pursuing a career aligned with one's passions. This episode underscores the potential for positive change and growth even in the face of significant challenges.

“Being on my own was a very foreign thing for me, because I constantly had surrounded myself with lots of people. And I think I had done that looking back very deliberately because I was people-pleaser, I needed validation. And that meant having people around me. So being on my own really helps me start to untangle a lot of my thoughts and process a lot of those thoughts and then start to really connect back with my feelings.”- Michelle Gordon

Key highlights:

• Coping with burnout by turning to alcohol as a means of escape, leading to a cycle of overworking, overcompensating, and people-pleasing.

• Seeking help from a life coach, shifting her perspective on life and taking back control over her destiny.

• The healing process involved identifying and aligning with her core values, recognizing the importance of health, freedom, and family, which she had neglected while defined solely by her nursing identity.

• Through fitness, self-reflection, and reconnection with emotions, she regained mental clarity, leading to positive changes in her overall well-being.

• Michelle stopped using alcohol as a coping mechanism, faced the discomfort of feeling her emotions, and found solace in practices like weightlifting and beach walks. Her relationship with alcohol transformed, allowing her to enjoy a beer without the need for escapism.

• Learning to be present, savoring small moments, and appreciating the beauty around. This mindfulness contributed to her overall sense of joy and well-being.

• Michelle's personal experience enables her to empathize with others facing burnout, helping them navigate the challenges and rediscover a sense of self.

Connect with Michelle:

Email michelle@thehealthyhappynurse.com

Website thehealthyhappynurse.com

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