Getting on the Same Team, Part 1: Stop venting to friends and start solving the problem together
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Getting on the Same Team, Part 1: Stop venting to friends and start solving the problem together
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You're both in pain about your desire gap, but you're processing it separately – venting to friends, talking to therapists, building separate narratives about what's wrong. Meanwhile, the gap between you keeps widening. Sound familiar?
Most couples approach mismatched libidos like adversaries: one person wants more sex, one wants less, and now you're fighting about whose needs matter more. But when one of you loses, you both lose.
In this episode, you'll learn why the adversarial approach never works, how to get underneath surface feelings like "frustrated" or "fine" to the real pain you're both experiencing, and why suppressing your feelings or only venting to others actually makes your desire gap worse. This is the foundation for everything that follows – getting vulnerable enough to stop fighting each other and start solving the problem together.
Get my free guide: 5 Steps to Start Solving Desire Differences
(Without Blame or Shame), A Practical Starting Point for Individuals and Couples, at https://laurajurgens.com/libido
Find out more about me at https://laurajurgens.com/