I recently listened to Mel Robbin's book, "Let Them". I will admit, I was a bit skeptical at first and I will also admit I am a touch jealous of Mel and how well she has done her podcast and how successful she has been. A little jealousy can be good, and in this case, is incentive to be better and work harder. So, I listened to the book. What I got out of it was something that I have believed for a long time. It is the idea that you can only control your own actions and thoughts. You can't ever control anyone else. It is a good reminder for those of us who already adhere to the, "To each their own" idea. And it is a good lesson for those who hadn't considered it. Sometimes you just gotta give a person or situation an imaginary shrug and say, "To each their own!"

Happy New Year, everyone! We are at the end of another year and as I reflect on this, I realize that some of the most fun times I have had were unplanned and unexpected. And some of the hardest times in life are also unexpected. In this coming year, I hope you are able to soak in the moments, good and bad, and really feel life. I hope you are able to connect with others, be there for them and with them in the fun, unexpected days and the hard unexpected days.

We have all kinds of relationships in this life. Some are definitely more meaningful and deep than others. Someone recently asked me about a friend of mine and my response was, "We are friends". She sort of made light about the topic and I joked along. But later that day, I got to thinking. Friendship is the deepest relationship we can really have with one another. If someone is truly your friend, they have your back. They are there for you during the hard times and also the good times. A true friend will be there even when you aren't that lovable or fun to be around. Couples who have been married for decades probably won't tell you romance is more important than their mutual respect and love for each other as friends. I really think friendship is the end goal of every relationship and what every relationship strives to be.

Today I am talking about the two very different experiences I have had with my parents and the end of life. Many years ago, my mom had cancer. Her struggle was painful and hard to watch. It was, to say the least, a stressful time. I had three kids under the age of five. And the added stress was that our relationship was not always a close one. I was grateful for her death, when it came, because she was no longer in pain. But, at that time, I didn't get the blessing of the perspective a person can gain from going through old age with a parent. The experience of spending this time with my dad is a completely different thing. He is in different part of his life as he is elderly and has some dementia. And I am in a different part of my life as I am able to view it all from a different perspective than I did with my mom. I am taking it all in and letting myself feel all the feels, all the while knowing it may bring me more sadness in the end. I am grateful for the journey. It will be a treasure to look back on and cherish.

Today I am talking to you about aging parents and how spending time with my dad has brought us closer than ever before. It's really hard to see a loved one change and lose their memory. Wrapping your mind around that person being "gone" but still here is eye opening and sad and sometimes just plain depressing. My dad has always been my biggest fan but the thing I have noticed in his dementia is that he is a kinder, more thoughtful and compassionate person than he was before. He is softer than he was in his past life. I am thankful for this chance to know him better and to love him well. To love someone is to be vulnerable. Vulnerable to the sadness when we lose them. The risk of LOVE is loss. But the reward of LOVE is far greater than we can imagine. I know this closeness will make it harder to lose him, but I remain thankful for this love we are so blessed to share.

Do you find yourself wondering why someone doesn't seem to care about something you are going through? It is so easy to get wrapped up in our own stories and our own lives that we assume everyone is being insensitive when they don't reach out. In reality, everyone is just living their own story. They are not ignoring you because they don't care. They are just wrapped up in their own stuff. So... the next time you wonder why someone doesn't seem to care, reach out to them and ask them how THEY are doing. Flip the script on yourself and do what you wish they were doing. It just may change your perspective entirely!

There are many times in life when we know the answer to the question, but we just keep plugging along and ignore our gut and intuition. I am at a crossroads in my life with family situations and I know which road to take. I know what the right thing is for me, but I have let so many things get in the way of making that decision and moving forward. Some of the things I have let stand in the way are guilt, a sense of responsibility, and fear of the unknown. I am now determined do what my gut is telling me to do and stay in alignment with my values. As my good friend says, "Life first. Everything else can wait."

I have been dealing with something super fun that everyone wants to talk about...aging parents. What? Not fun? It is really hard to see your parent who was once your protector, the boss of you and the one who kept you in line, fail in one way or another. I took my dad to visit the facility he will be moving into later this month, and I was surprised at all the little and big lessons I came away with. First of all, he seems oddly ok with living in a one-room apartment. But the biggest lesson came from me realizing that he has 31 years on me. 31!! It really got me thinking about appreciating my capabilities, not sitting around moping about not having a purpose, and making the MOST of what's left of this life. We could all end up in that same one-room apartment someday. We may not even live to see tomorrow. So...let's remind ourselves how precious this life and our bodies and our minds are and get out there and really start living!