It’s that time of year again—the pumpkins are lit, the coffins creak open, and the Filmjitsu Halloween Series rises from the grave! In this first of three frights for the season, Mike hands Jay a slice of ‘90s pay-cable horror cheese: Tales from the Crypt Presents: Bordello of Blood! Starring Dennis Miller as a snarky private eye investigating a brothel full of bloodsuckers, this late-night relic from 1996 proves that not every tale from the Crypt was worth telling. Will Jay find pleasure in this neon-soaked vampire romp, or will Miller's painful wisecracks and the film's nonsensical plot make him cancel his HBO subscription? After the main review, the guys drain a few pints of creativity for their Bottom Five '...of Blood's, a gloriously stupid challenge where they take perfectly respectable non-horror movies, slap “of Blood” onto the title, and pitch their own horrific re-imaginings. From Drop Dead Fred of Blood to On Golden Pond of Blood, it’s a cornucopia of cinematic crimes against good taste! And because it wouldn’t be Halloween without a little extra mischief, the episode wraps with a terrifying round of Dueling Double Bills, where random horror picks force the hosts to conjure the ultimate double features from Hell. So sharpen your stakes, fill your goblet, and lock your crypt, because Filmjitsu is back in black (and red) for Halloween—and this time, blood is on tap!

After many years of bad-movie watching, the guys finally make their way to Uwe Boll, the infamous shlock director whose career largely consists of nearly unwatchable videogame adaptations. In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale was Boll's 2007 attempt at a big-budget, all-star adventure and Jay - on the advice of an old friend - drops this $60 million dollar bomb on Mike's head. As he's done with countless other terrible movies, from Cool as Ice to Coyote Ugly, will Mike be able to turn this cinematic pain into pleasure? Find out during an epic main review and stick around as the guys list off their Bottom Five Kings, a list of movie monarch malcontents that is sure to surprise. After a quick trip through the listener mail bag, it's once again time for Mike to exact his revenge, handing Jay not only a weird bit of movie mayhem but a special offering to mark the start spooky season! This episode's got everything - from Burt Reynolds choking out his agent to a rumor about Ed Begley Jr.'s BDE - so slap on some headphones and put on your finest leathers because a-dungeon-siegin' you're-a-goin' with the podcast that wields films as deadly weapons!

Tackling something entirely new for Filmjitsu, Mike slaps Jay with the huge cinematic tortilla that is the 2019 documentary/mockumentary Wrinkles the Clown. And Jay, mouth full of water and brain full of contempt, does his best to keep himself together while discussing clown fear, parenting and Inuit folktales. This is a weird one for sure, but the guys return to their usual shenanigans while counting down their Bottom Five Punishments, a collection of bizarre, frequently upsetting, and often cruel diegetic disciplines that include being slapped with a VHS tape, cursed with inexplicable paralyzation and forced to eat... chocolate cake? If that's not enough, during a raucous round of Dueling Double Bills, Mike and Jay pay their respects to Robert Redford while pairing some of his movies with the likes of... Shakes the Clown. It's clowns and punishment this week, a three-ring cinema side-show served-up with a side of Greek auteurism and the discovery of a 1981 nexus of talent! Step right up, folks—because this episode again proves the harshest punishment is usually just hitting ‘play.’

As "Hot Filmjitsu Summer 2025" concludes, Jay "Streep-slaps" Mike with the Meryl Streep grenade he annually pulls the pin on. This year Mike had to endure "She-Devil," a 1989 "comedy" about a housewife seeking revenge on her philandering husband by punishing the high-society romance novelist who stole him. Featuring the unlikely combo of Meryl Streep and Roseanne Barr as its headliners, "She-Devil" was the perfect choice to partner with the guys' Bottom Five Team Ups, a list of promising—or at least intriguing—marquee matches that wound up disappointing in some way. After the guys finish talking about everyone from Elvis to Estelle Getty, they take a moment to offer their respects to another great talent that recently passed with a game of Kick Two, Pick Two. And, as always, the cycle of mayhem continues with Mike revealing what Jay's next cinematic punishment will be.

Mike sends Jay back to the beaches of 1993 with Weekend at Bernie’s II, the definition of an unnecessary sequel that doubles down on absurdity by giving everyone’s favorite dead guy a tropical vacation, a voodoo curse, and an uncanny ability to boogie. Will Jay find the sun-soaked slapstick charming, or will Bernie’s reanimated antics leave them washed ashore in cinematic despair? After the main review, the guys island-hop through their Bottom Five Islands, a countdown of movie atolls, sand traps, and forgotten rocks that prove not all paradise is worth visiting. Then, it’s time for another heated round of Dueling Double Bills, where surprise titles must be paired with equally unexpected cinematic companions. Finally, Jay leaves Mike stranded with his pick as this "Hot Filmjitsu Summer" of punishment concludes. So grab your sunscreen, pack your conch shell, and remember: dead men may tell no tales, but they sure can ruin your vacation.

As the 2025 version of Superman cleans up at the global box office, Jay sends Mike to 1987 to watch the most maligned version of "the man of steel" this side of anything Zack Snyder touched. Superman IV: The Quest for Peace was Christopher Reeve's final screen outing as the character which began with the largely beloved '78 Superman. Will their respect for the actor's undeniable skill and charisma withstand a movie featuring "Nuclear Man" as its main villain? Find out in Mike's main review and then stick around as the guys count down their Bottom Five Super Powers, a list of extraordinary abilities they find anything but. After that, the co-hosts dust off Kick Two, Pick Two to pay tribute to one of Mike's fallen heroes, after which he wipes his tears by assigning Jay the next film that'll keep this "Hot Filmjitsu Summer" a cinematic scorcher!

After years of slapping Jay with a cinematic tortilla the size of a cruise ship, Mike shows mercy and assigns Jay a Filmjitsu-team favorite... set on a cruise ship. On paper, there's no way 1998's "Deep Rising" could earn a positive review, for not only does it have a title that makes filmgoers do a double-take, but it also has Treat Williams as the headliner and is directed by the guy responsible for "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra." But in a "hear me out" for the ages, Jay—and Mike—explain why "Deep Rising," and indeed all b-movies, are worthy not only of your time, but your love as well! And speaking of love, how about that title!? After fawning all over, "Deep Rising," the guys list off their Bottom Five Unintentional Porn Titles, movies with names that make you blush when you mention what you were up late watching last night! After that, this saucy theme is kept alive during a game of Dueling Double Bills until, finally, Jay reveals what's in store for Mike on the next episode. So sit back and grab some lotion and Kleenex because it's summer and time to turn on Filmjitsu!

Jay tests Mike's faith in, well... anything, by forcing him to watch the 2014 bargain basement Bible blip, "Left Behind" in which Nicolas Cage navigates both a plane and the apocalypse while trying desperately to keep a straight face. Piles of clothes and dime-store special effects abound, but was Mike embraced in a freeing, heavenly light or just left with an eternal laundry list? Find out during the main review and then stick around while the guys list off their Bottom Five Nicolas Cage performance, an array of eccentric on-screen (and perhaps imagined?) roles that the award-winning, much-adored actor simply couldn't pull off. After unlocking Cage's various national non-treasures, Mike and Jay play an end-of-the-world inspired game of Dueling Double Bills before Mike reveals what's in store for Jay on the next episode. So put on a pair of clean underwear and get rapture-ready because this episode of the podcast that wields films like deadly weapons is purely divine!