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What happens when the unthinkable creeps into your relationship? The answers might surprise you. After counseling countless couples through the aftermath of infidelity, we've discovered that affairs rarely "just happen" – they're the result of small compromises that accumulate over time.

Drawing from both personal and professional experience, we reveal how good people can make devastating choices when they fail to establish proper boundaries. Our own marriage has weathered significant storms over 25 years, and we've learned that preventing infidelity requires intentional guardrails long before temptation strikes.

The episode explores common pathways that lead to affairs: emotional disconnection, unmet needs, loneliness within marriage, personal brokenness, revenge, crisis situations, and simple selfishness. We break down the progression from innocent interaction to full-blown affair, revealing how adultery always begins in the heart.

Most importantly, we share ten practical strategies for affair-proofing your relationship, including guarding your heart and mind, daily investment in emotional intimacy, maintaining a vibrant sexual connection, setting firm boundaries with the opposite sex, practicing complete transparency, surrounding yourself with pro-marriage friends, dealing quickly with conflict, and making God the center of your relationship.

Whether you're newlyweds or celebrating decades together, these principles provide concrete protection against one of marriage's greatest threats. The stakes couldn't be higher – as we explain, the consequences of infidelity go far beyond momentary pleasure, potentially destroying your family, reputation, and decades of shared history.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

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What critical questions should you ask before saying "I do"? With half of all marriages ending in divorce despite everyone believing theirs will last forever, these three game-changing questions could save your relationship from becoming another statistic.

The marriage journey transforms us in ways we never anticipate. The first essential question recognizes this reality: "Can you handle me changing?" That vibrant 23-year-old you fell in love with will inevitably become a different person at 43 and 63. Many of us marry an image rather than a real person—attracted to their current appearance, ambitions, or how they make us feel—without considering the transformation that decades bring. Whether it's physical changes after children, shifting career goals, or evolving priorities, marriage requires love that transcends these natural evolutions.

Equally important is the counterpoint: "Can you handle me not changing?" We often enter marriage with a subconscious desire to mold our partner into versions of ourselves. That spouse who struggles with punctuality, plays video games excessively, or approaches finances differently may never fundamentally change these traits. Before marriage, become a "fruit inspector"—carefully examining consistent patterns and honestly asking if you can accept those unchangeable aspects for a lifetime. Many relationships deteriorate because one spouse continuously pressures the other to become someone they're not designed to be.

Finally, ask: "Will you love me when you don't like me?" Every marriage experiences seasons where affection wanes and irritation grows, yet commitment must remain. Many couples mistake the temporary butterflies of the infatuation stage (typically lasting three months to three years) for the foundation of marriage. Real love chooses connection even during difficult seasons and finds ways to rebuild fondness through intentional efforts.

These questions highlight why physical intimacy before marriage can cloud judgment about fundamental compatibility issues. The emotional bonds created through sex often lead people to overlook critical differences that become relationship-breaking problems after marriage.

Take time to honestly explore these three questions with your partner. Your willingness to face these realities now could make the difference between a marriage that thrives through decades of change and one that joins the sobering divorce statistics.

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

info@kenandtabatha.com

Send us a text

Authenticity is becoming increasingly rare in our carefully curated world. While many struggle to present perfect images of themselves online and offline, Ken and Tabatha tackle the transformative power of radical honesty.

They introduce the HOT principle—Honest, Open, Transparent—as the foundation for truly meaningful relationships, whether in marriage, friendship, business, or ministry. "I don't understand why people portray themselves as something they're not," Ken reflects, challenging listeners to examine their own commitment to truth.

Throughout the conversation, they explore how dishonesty creates fractures in trust that eventually break relationships apart. "Without honesty, you don't have trust, and without trust, you don't have a relationship," Tabitha emphasizes. The spiritual implications are profound too—lying literally aligns us with what scripture calls "the father of lies" while truthfulness reflects God's character.

For singles, they offer straight-talking advice: put honesty near the top of your list when looking for a spouse, second only to loving God. For marrieds, they discuss how even withholding truth damages intimacy. For parents, they suggest practical ways to teach children the value of honesty without resorting to "white lies" about Santa or storks.

The episode concludes with five practical steps to grow in honesty: get honest with yourself first, speak truth in love, release fear of rejection, practice small honest acts daily, and invite accountability through safe conversations. Ken shares a powerful personal story about correcting a $1,000 billing error, demonstrating how choosing honesty—even when costly—yields greater rewards than monetary gain.

Ready to become more authentic in your relationships? Listen now, then share with someone who needs this message. Subscribe to get new episodes every Thursday at 3pm!

GET THE BETTER MARRIAGE BOOTCAMP HERE:

Better Marriage Bootcamp (kenandtabatha.com)

Better Marriage 90-Day Devotional:
90 Day Better Marriage Devotional - Ken and Tabatha (square.site)

DOWNLOAD THE FAMILY MEETING OUTLINE HERE ⬇️
https://www.kenandtabatha.com/pl/2148103888

Support Our Ministry:
https://myalivechurch.org/give


Connect with us:

- Website:

https://www.kenclaytor.com
https://www.tabathaclaytor.com
https://www.myalivechurch.org

- Socials:

Instagram -

https://www.instagram.com/kenclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/tabathaclaytor/
https://www.instagram.com/myalivechurch/

TikTok-

@Ken_Claytor
@Tabathaclaytor
@myalivechurch

Facebook-

https://www.facebook.com/PastorKenClaytor
https://www.facebook.com/pastortabathaclaytor
https://www.facebook.com/myalivechurch

- Ask us questions:

info@kenandtabatha.com