Send us Fan Mail

CPTB is a conversational, funny, and thoughtful take on this week's Bible readings — for preachers, church leaders, deconstructors, and curious listeners who still love scripture, even when they're not sure what to do with it. We explore the text with humor and theological depth, without certainty, outrage, or easy answers.

What does it take to convince someone they're going to hell? Apparently, a Billy Graham crusade, a youth retreat horror movie featuring a floating bloody head, or possibly just the right Konami code sequence entered on enough church crosses. This week Bob and Eric are joined by cartoonist-comedian Teresa Roberts Logan (@laughingredhead) and returning comic guest Zach Funk (@zachfunkyeah) to dig into John 20:19-31 — the appearance of the risen Jesus to the disciples, and the moment Thomas earns a nickname he'll never shake.

Expect:

• Thomas the Twin — twin of whom, exactly?
• Why you can't call him Diddy
• The Southern Baptist childhood-to-ex-vangelical pipeline, lived in full
• What the Christian comedy circuit looks like from the inside
• The Konami Code as soteriology
• Spiritual colorblindness as a framework for faith
• Bob's favorite original joke (the Pontiff's Pilot)
• Kenneth Copeland, Billy Graham, and the difference between American Jesus and Bible Jesus

Don't miss: Eric's sidebar on what happens when Lutherans over-spiritualize the gospel — with a very specific historical example.

---

John 20:19–31 (NRSVue)

[19] When it was evening on that day, the first day of the week, and the doors were locked where the disciples were, for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” [20] After he said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples rejoiced when they saw the Lord. [21] Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” [22] When he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. [23] If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.” [24] But Thomas (who was called the Twin), one of the twelve, was not with them when Jesus came. [25] So the other disciples told him, “We have seen the Lord.” But he said to them, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe.” [26] A week later his disciples were again in the house, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were shut, Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” [27] Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here and see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it in my side. Do not doubt but believe.” [28] Thomas answered him, “My Lord and my God!” [29] Jesus said to him, “Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have come to believe.” [30] Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence

Hosted by Pastor Eric Damon and Pastor Bob Schaefer.

Join the community!
Email us at cptbpod@gmail.com.
Find us at @cptbpod on most social media platforms.
More at linktr.ee/cptbpod

Music: Trickster by Phat Sounds
Free download: https://filmmusic.io/song/10864-trickster
Licensed under CC BY 4.0: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Scripture quotations are taken from the New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition. Copyright © 2021 National Council of Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Send us Fan Mail

CPTB is a conversational, funny, and thoughtful take on this week's Bible readings — for preachers, church leaders, deconstructors, and curious listeners who still love scripture, even when they're not sure what to do with it. We explore the text with humor and theological depth, without certainty, outrage, or easy answers.

On this Short Take episode of Comedians with Pastors Talking Bible, it's Easter Sunday — and the tomb is empty, the guards have fainted, and Jesus is already ahead of you in Galilee.

Also, he's a little extra. He didn't have to show up to meet the women on their way to tell the disciples. Everything that needed to happen had already happened. He just wanted to.

This week we're asking: why is Easter harder to commodify than Christmas? Who sent the women to preach the gospel first — and what does that mean? What is a participation trophy, and did Jesus earn one? And why, if you've never been to a Holy Week service, is this the week to find one?

Also: Charles Dickens ruined Christmas. We have receipts.

Join Pastor Bob Schaefer, Pastor Eric Damon, and resident comic theologians Abby Evans (@itsabbye) and Erick Williams (@comicaledubs) for a Short Take that somehow ends with everyone going "yaaaay."

Matthew 28:1–10 (NRSVue)

[1] After the sabbath, as the first day of the week was dawning, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary went to see the tomb. [2] And suddenly there was a great earthquake, for an angel of the Lord, descending from heaven, came and rolled back the stone and sat on it. [3] His appearance was like lightning and his clothing white as snow. [4] For fear of him the guards shook and became like dead men. [5] But the angel said to the women, "Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus who was crucified. [6] He is not here, for he has been raised, as he said. Come, see the place where he lay. [7] Then go quickly and tell his disciples, 'He has been raised from the dead, and indeed he is going ahead of you to Galilee; there you will see him.' This is my message for you." [8] So they left the tomb quickly with fear and great joy and ran to tell his disciples. [9] Suddenly Jesus met them and said, "Greetings!" And they came to him, took hold of his feet, and worshiped him. [10] Then Jesus said to them, "Do not be afraid; go and tell my brothers and sisters to go to Galilee; there they will see me."

Hosted by Pastor Eric Damon and Pastor Bob Schaefer.

Join the community!
Email us at cptbpod@gmail.com.
Find us at @cptbpod on most social media platforms.
More at linktr.ee/cptbpod

Music: Trickster by Phat Sounds
Free download: https://filmmusic.io/song/10864-trickster
Licensed under CC BY 4.0: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Scripture quotations are taken from the New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition. Copyright © 2021 National Council of Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Send us Fan Mail

Comedians with Pastors Talking Bible is where standup comedians and ELCA pastors sit down to discuss the week's lectionary readings—the same passages that preachers around the world will proclaim the following Sunday. It's theology, comedy, and irreverence in conversation.

This week: Palm Sunday—the reading that opens with triumph and closes with catastrophe. Pastor Bob sits down with returning guests Cassi Bruno (@cassi_dicci) and Lou Pastorius (@notorious_pastorius) to talk about what it means when Jesus enters Jerusalem looking like a king, then gets arrested. But here's where theology gets interesting: what if the cross is the triumph? What if God's idea of victory looks nothing like ours?

Expect: Heated debates about burning phone books and nerf balls with magnifying glasses. An extended ASMR tangent that somehow becomes theological. Bob explaining why he preaches the entire passion narrative as a play. And a closing theological flourish on the word "eucatastrophe"—a good catastrophic event. (Yes, someone needs to tell you what that means, and yes, it matters.)

Tangents: Mukbang. Misophonia. The psychology of childhood fire-starting. Jonathan Groff's theatrical spit.

"That is what triumph looks like—the cross, the grave, the stone rolled away."

--

Matthew 21:1–11 (NRSVue)

[1] When they had come near Jerusalem and had reached Bethphage, at the Mount of Olives, Jesus sent two disciples, [2] saying to them, “Go into the village ahead of you, and immediately you will find a donkey tied and a colt with her; untie them and bring them to me. [3] If anyone says anything to you, just say this, ‘The Lord needs them.’ And he will send them immediately.” [4] This took place to fulfill what had been spoken through the prophet: [5] “Tell the daughter of Zion, Look, your king is coming to you, humble and mounted on a donkey, and on a colt, the foal of a donkey.” [6] The disciples went and did as Jesus had directed them; [7] they brought the donkey and the colt and put their cloaks on them, and he sat on them. [8] A very large crowd spread their cloaks on the road, and others cut branches from the trees and spread them on the road. [9] The crowds that went ahead of him and that followed were shouting, “Hosanna to the Son of David! Blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest heaven!” [10] When he entered Jerusalem, the whole city was in turmoil, asking, “Who is this?” [11] The crowds were saying, “This is the prophet Jesus from Nazareth in Galilee.”

Hosted by Pastor Eric Damon and Pastor Bob Schaefer.

Join the community!
Email us at cptbpod@gmail.com.
Find us at @cptbpod on most social media platforms.
More at linktr.ee/cptbpod

Music: Trickster by Phat Sounds
Free download: https://filmmusic.io/song/10864-trickster
Licensed under CC BY 4.0: https://filmmusic.io/standard-license

Scripture quotations are taken from the New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition. Copyright © 2021 National Council of Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.