Alabama absolutely must beat Vanderbilt, or Kalen DeBoer will feel the temperature rising again. Bill Belichick could put Dabo on the hot seat this week. Virginia is nationally ranked and appears to be a legit contender in the ACC. Crappy has abandoned college football for a few days to be a baseball fan.

And those are just a small handful of the abundance of weird sentences that we utter in the Week 6 edition of the Carla and Crappy Show. Welcome back, friends.

While our fearless leader is away counting balls and strikes in Cleveland, Carla and AJ are joined by long-time friend of the show and unofficial television voice of the Blue Raiders, Jake Rose, to continue our weekly tradition of talking (too much) about college football.

Jake gets us started by reveling in his “better than last year” Indiana Hoosiers (uh oh, Big Ten), while AJ is yet again having feelings about Hawaii football. Carla, meanwhile, is still frustrated by double overtime and wonders if Dan Lanning may have inadvertently created a low-key rivalry between the Ducks and Nittany Lions.

Then, AJ runs us through his #GroupOfFiveAfterDark report, which includes Clemson at North Carolina (Noon ET, ESPN), which is neither G5 nor After Dark, but it has very high stupid potential. Also, Air Force travels to Navy (Noon ET, CBS) in a battle of planes versus boats, and a friendly reminder that Duke at Cal (10:30 ET, ESPN) is a conference game. Thanks, All-Coast Conference.

And then, onto this week’s intriguing slate:

No. 14 Iowa State at Cincinnati (Noon ET, ESPN2): Why is Cincy favored in this game? Does anyone know what we’re missing?

No. 16 Vanderbilt at No. 10 Alabama (3:30 ET, ESPN): Uh oh. Bama looks like it might actually be back … just in time to host Diego and the Dores. Yes, this is a must-win for the Tide. And yes, it feels very weird to say that.

No. 24 Virginia at Louisville (3:30 ET, ESPN2): Louisville can be feisty at home, but we think Virginia might actually be legit good.

No. 11 Texas Tech at Houston (7 ET, ESPN): Tech’s expensive roster seems to be working, especially on defense. We’ll see if that holds up against the unbeaten Cougars on the road.

No. 3 Miami at No. 18 Florida State (7:30 ET, ABC): The last time these two teams were nationally ranked in this game was 2016. Can the Noles bounce back from last week’s collapse? Or will Mario Cristobal find a new way to mess up the Canes’ clock management? (Spoiler: AJ thinks this game ends on a doink. Here’s hoping.)

Honorable mentions this week go to three potentially appetizing Big 12 buffet options: Kansas State at Baylor (Noon ET, ESPN+), TCU at Colorado (7:30 ET, FOX), and Kansas at UCF (7:30 ET, ESPN2). We also run down our usual teams, because that’s what we do:

• Ohio at Ball State (Noon ET, CBSSN): We’re still trying to get the Bobcats to the playoff, even without Crappy.

• Robert Morris at Merrimack (Noon ET, ESPN+): One final test before conference play for the Colonials.

• McDaniel College at Carnegie Mellon (3 ET, athletics.cmu.edu): What, exactly, is a Green Terror? The Tartans are about to find out.

• No. 7 Penn State at UCLA (3:30 ET, CBS): Carla’s team gets a get-right game.

• Minnesota at No. 1 Ohio State (7:30 ET, NBC): We hear boats don’t row well in the middle of Ohio.

We’re grateful to Jake for jumping in to fill in this week, and as always, we’re grateful to you for all you do for our little show. Enjoy the college football this weekend, friends. We’ll see if Crappy comes back next week. Cheers!