This is the hardest episode Rachel has recorded — because she's not done yet. In the finale of the first arc of Breaking Upward, she talks about forgiveness from inside the process, not from the other side of it.

No five steps. No closing affirmation. Just what forgiveness actually is, what it isn't, and why it matters not for them — but for you. Nurse midwife Rachel Newhouse on forgiving your ex, forgiving yourself, and what the trauma-informed approach to forgiveness says that nobody else is saying.

IN THIS EPISODE

• What forgiveness is not — and why the version most of us were taught requires us to make things smaller than they were

• Forgiving yourself: the specific, particular guilt of what your child experienced

• The thing Rachel didn't expect — and why it answered every doubt she ever had about her decision

• Forgiving your ex: not for them, for you — and the physiological case for why chronic anger is expensive

• Forgiving the people who didn't show up: the friends, the family members, the mentors who said cruel things

• Why forgiveness is a direction, not a destination — and what it means to keep walking toward it when you're not there yet

• Nurse's Note: Trauma-informed care doesn't ask survivors to forgive. What it asks instead — and the clinical case for why putting it down is an act of self-preservation

If this series has helped you navigate any part of this process, the Breaking Upward tool is the next step. It was built to take the guesswork out of the legal and financial pieces so you have more space for everything else.

Try it free at app.breaking-upward.com

RESOURCES & LINKS

Breaking Upward AI Tool: app.breaking-upward.com

Website: breaking-upward.com

Instagram: @breaking_upward_divorce

TikTok: @breakingupward

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 | Text START to 88788 | thehotline.org

DISCLAIMER

This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. Nothing here is legal, financial, or therapeutic advice. Please work with licensed professionals for your specific situation. I'm Rachel Newhouse. This is Breaking Upward. You are not breaking down. You are breaking upward.

Why is this podcast called Breaking Upward? In the penultimate episode of the first arc, nurse midwife Rachel Newhouse shares the story behind the name — and what it means to break in a direction rather than just apart.

This episode is about post-traumatic growth, what upward actually looks like on an ordinary Tuesday, and what Rachel is building beyond the podcast for women navigating divorce.

IN THIS EPISODE

• The moment Rachel realized she wasn't breaking apart — she was breaking upward

• What 'upward' actually means: a direction, not a destination, and not the same as 'better'

• The end-of-book metaphor: why this is the end of a chapter, not the end of the series

• Post-traumatic growth — the clinical, measurable phenomenon behind what you're experiencing right now

• What Rachel is building beyond this podcast: a tool for women who need real support navigating the process

• What breaking upward looks like in practice on a normal Tuesday

• Nurse's Note: As a midwife, Rachel has caught new life entering the world. Post-traumatic growth is what that feels like from the inside — and the research that proves it's real

The tool Rachel mentions in this episode is real and it's ready. The Breaking Upward AI helps you understand your legal documents, assess your situation, and find your next step — built specifically for people in this process.

Try it free at app.breaking-upward.com

RESOURCES & LINKS

Breaking Upward AI Tool: app.breaking-upward.com

Website: breaking-upward.com

Instagram: @breaking_upward_divorce

TikTok: @breakingupward

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 | Text START to 88788 | thehotline.org

DISCLAIMER

This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. Nothing here is legal, financial, or therapeutic advice. Please work with licensed professionals for your specific situation. I'm Rachel Newhouse. This is Breaking Upward. You are not breaking down. You are breaking upward.

You are not behind. You are not too late. If you're staring down a divorce in your 30s, 40s, or beyond and feeling like the window has closed, this episode is the one you need to hear.

Nurse midwife Rachel Newhouse — who applied to be a pilot after her divorce — talks about what starting over actually looks like, the neuroscience of new beginnings, and why the women with the most interesting second chapters are the ones who decided 'too late' wasn't a real category.

IN THIS EPISODE

• The permission slip divorce hands you whether you wanted it or not — and what to do with it

• Why 'starting over' is the wrong frame: you are not starting from zero, you are starting from here

• The pilot application: what Rachel learned about herself by applying for something completely unexpected

• What starting over actually looks like in practice (it's smaller and more specific than it sounds)

• The 'too late' myth — and why it's a story, not a fact

• Behavioral activation: the clinical technique behind why doing something before you feel ready is exactly right

• Nurse's Note: What chronic stress does to the brain — and the research on neuroplasticity, recovery, and why your brain is built for exactly what you're doing right now

Your next chapter starts with understanding where you stand today. The Breaking Upward tool helps you assess your situation, understand your options, and take the next step — privately and at no cost.

Try it free at app.breaking-upward.com

RESOURCES & LINKS

Breaking Upward AI Tool: app.breaking-upward.com

Website: breaking-upward.com

Instagram: @breaking_upward_divorce

TikTok: @breakingupward

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 | Text START to 88788 | thehotline.org

DISCLAIMER

This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only. Nothing here is legal, financial, or therapeutic advice. Please work with licensed professionals for your specific situation. I'm Rachel Newhouse. This is Breaking Upward. You are not breaking down. You are breaking upward.