Divorce isn’t just paperwork.

It’s identity.It’s faith.It’s boundaries.
It’s rebuilding while life keeps moving.

In this candid conversation, I sit down with Lya Williams to talk about what it really looks like to navigate divorce as Black women living in Iowa. We discuss the identity shift that comes with losing the title of “wife,” the emotional weight of healing in real time, and the courage it takes to choose yourself — even when society tells you to “just pray about it” and stay.

We talk about:

• The identity crisis after divorce
• Gaslighting and emotional abuse
• Boundaries and co-parenting
• Being the “strong Black woman” and wanting softness
• Therapy, journaling, and faith
• Career pivots and rediscovering belief in yourself
• Support systems — and what happens when they aren’t where you expected
• The audacity to leave and rebuild anyway

This isn’t bitterness.This isn’t husband-bashing.This is reflection.

Whether you’re divorced, healing, contemplating change, or learning to put yourself first — this episode is for you.

🎧 Listen. Reflect. Heal.

Follow & connect:Instagram & TikTok: @blackgirliowaWebsite: www.blackgirliowa.com

#BlackGirlIowa #BlackWomenHealing #DivorceRecovery #ChooseYourself #SoftLifeSeason

What happens when the dream you built your identity around suddenly ends?

This week on Black. Girl. Iowa., Emili sits down with leader, husband, father, former professional basketball player, and host of The Minds with Hakeem, Jjuan Hakeem.

From growing up in Beaumont, Texas to building a life in Iowa, Jjuan shares:

• The identity crisis that followed retiring from professional basketball

• Why asking for help is actually strength

• The power of long-standing friendships

• What it means to lead as a Black man in Iowa

• How faith grounds him in divisive times

They also get into career pivots, community work through Change Course, masculinity, mentorship, and yes — a little Cowboys vs. Packers debate.

This episode is about redefining success, restoring relationships, and remembering who you are beyond your title.

🎧 Listen now.

After a short hiatus, Emili is back — no script, no outline, just truth.

In this deeply personal solo episode, she opens up about fear, anxiety, feeling lost after divorce, turning 40, and the quiet paralysis that comes from not believing your own story matters.

Why is it easier to show up for work, for students, for interviews, for church — but harder to show up for yourself?

Why is publishing the book harder than writing it?

Why is pressing record alone more terrifying than interviewing anyone else?

This episode is about:

• Operating in uncomfortable spaces

• Being afraid but wanting more

• The pressure of perfection

• Feeling lost in 2025

• Turning 40 and craving bravery

• The struggle to believe you are capable of amazing things

• And choosing to try anyway

This is Emili without the polish.Without the outline.Without the performance.

Just real.

And maybe that’s enough.