• Marc Maron Torches Bill Maher on Pod Save America as Hot ICE 'Agent Dumptruck' Goes Viral and Trump Threatens ABC & NBC
    2025/08/26
    Marc Maron took aim at Bill Maher on Pod Save America, calling him “desperate” and accusing him of chasing relevance at any cost. Meanwhile, ICE accidentally turned a routine arrest photo into the internet’s latest thirst trap, Donald Trump threatened to revoke ABC and NBC’s FCC licenses over “fake news,” and RFK Jr. is reportedly plotting a COVID-19 vaccine ban. All that and more with Patrick Gutfield.
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    6 分
  • Cracker Barrel Rebrands, Trump Hates Fresh Sheets, and Ducks Defeat Detention
    2025/08/25
    Cracker Barrel ditches grandma’s kitchen vibes for a sleek new logo, and the internet unleashes its full fury. Trump reportedly freaked out over clean sheets, locked his own bedroom door against the Secret Service, and possibly hides the Epstein Files under his mattress. MSNBC accuses him of ankle concealment, and the White House hilariously plays along. Meanwhile, a federal judge shuts down Florida’s “Alligator Alcatraz” detention center… because you can’t build a prison in a swamp and pretend it’s not federal.
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    7 分
  • Trump Rides with the Troops, Kamala Hits the Road, and Solar Power Gets Fired
    2025/08/22
    Trump patrols the streets of D.C. with the military and celebrates “law and order” with a Shake Shack run. Meanwhile, the Vice President launches a crackdown on sunlight, banning “Solar” in all-caps, and Kamala Harris embarks on a 15-city book tour that somehow includes London. Also: the State Department decides to re-vet 55 million visa holders just in case, and no, you still haven’t heard about the Epstein Files.
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    6 分
  • Black Walls, Gold Offices, and Fake Windows: America, You’re Doing Great
    2025/08/21
    Trump wants to paint the border wall black because it gets hot—just like science says—and Jack White has thoughts about the new Oval Office, which now resembles a pro wrestler’s dressing room designed by Liberace. Meanwhile, Delta and United are being sued for selling “window seats” that don’t come with actual windows. It’s a big week for style over substance, beige walls over actual views, and gold over good taste.

    From Washington, where even the planes are lying to you, this is Ballot.
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    6 分
  • Trump Fights Museums, and Oklahoma Flunks the Constitution
    2025/08/20
    Donald Trump is furious that museums dare to talk about slavery, calling the Smithsonian “OUT OF CONTROL” and demanding more exhibits about “Success” and “Brightness.” Meanwhile, Oklahoma unveils a fifty-question anti-woke purity test for teachers that was cooked up by PragerU—because nothing says academic rigor like a quiz your uncle found on Facebook.
    Also: why Trump’s idea of “helping” Ukraine is basically cheerleading from 30,000 feet, and how one multiple-choice test thinks “In God We Trust” is in the Constitution. It’s a real day in America, folks.
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    6 分
  • Trump Hosts Zelensky and the European All-Stars: Peace Talks, Nobel Calls, and MS NOW
    2025/08/19
    President Trump welcomes Ukrainian President Zelensky and top European leaders to the White House in a flashy attempt at diplomacy—no yelling this time! Trump pitches a Putin-Zelensky-Trump summit while Europe floats “Article Five-like” promises no one can define. Plus: Trump’s awkward Nobel Prize cold-call to Norway, and MSNBC’s wild corporate rebrand to “MS NOW.” Is peace on the table or just another TV special? And did someone say… Epstein files? All that and more, on Ballot.
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    6 分
  • JD Vance’s Fishing Fiasco, Pub Mutiny & Trump wants Pocahontas drug tested
    2025/08/18
    British Foreign Secretary David Lammy and U.S. Vice President JD Vance got busted for fishing without licenses, sparking fines and a very “chummy” press conference. Vance’s trip got worse: he was rejected by a Michelin-rated pub, faced a protest called “Dance Against Vance,” and ended up retreating to Trump’s Turnberry golf course. Meanwhile, Trump celebrated Social Security’s 90th anniversary by calling Elizabeth Warren a “nutjob” who needs a drug test, while bragging about kicking 275,000 “illegal aliens” off Social Security.
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    5 分
  • Trump Meets Putin in Alaska While Taylor Swift Breaks the Internet
    2025/08/15
    Donald Trump is heading to Alaska for his first sit-down with Vladimir Putin since 2018, pitching himself as a diplomatic wedding planner while promising peace talks with Zelensky. Meanwhile, Trump mobilizes the National Guard for “community beautification” patrols in D.C.—because nothing says law and order like soldiers with leaf blowers. And in the culture wars, Taylor Swift’s appearance on Travis Kelce’s podcast breaks YouTube, leaving Trump fuming about podcast ratings.
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    5 分