Equalizer 2000 is a low-budget post-apocalyptic action outing that leans hard into its Mad Max-adjacent aspirations while never quite mustering the resources or narrative discipline to match them. Set in a desert wasteland where a militarized regime clashes with rebels over a powerful weapon created by Slade (the late genre film star Richard Norton), the film mostly strings together dusty chases, stock dystopian imagery, and stiff dialogue that feels engineered for functionality rather than persuasion. Its central gimmick, the titular MAN GUN, does most of the heavy lifting, often compensating for thin characterization and a plot that exists more as connective tissue between shootouts than a coherent arc.

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Mortal Kombat was the first video game movie that many people from our generation saw, which felt at least mostly faithful to the source material. Dark sorcerers, monsters, a tournament of fighters, and combat that may or may not be mortal. We've been dancing around this one for a long time, and we were planning on waiting for the upcoming 4K release, but when the idea of a month dedicated to people we lost last year came up, we decided it was time to pull the trigger and chat about Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa in his most iconic role as Shang Tsung. Liu Kang, Johnny Cage, and Sonya Blade travel to a mystical island with the help of Lord Raiden (played amazingly by Christopher Lambert) to defend Earth Realm against a coming incursion from the dark forces of Outworld. Directed by garbage king Paul WS Anderson, this one marks the start of a career featuring spotty CGI and weak scripts, and is definitely one of his best films.

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This is another new release we will be tackling this month. The Mandalorian and Grogu is a continuation of the series, which we just wrapped up, and will follow Din Djarin and Grogu as they are enlisted by the New Republic to protect Rotta the Hutt in exchange for information on another New Republic target. Let's fucking go!

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