『American Regret』のカバーアート

American Regret

American Regret

著者： American Regret
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Smart people don't ruin their lives by accident. They do it by being convincing — and the person they convince is themselves.

American Regret is a forensic examination of how capable, self-aware people talk themselves into the choices that end their lives as they knew them — and how the rest of us are doing the exact same thing right now, just with smaller stakes and no federal agents involved yet.

Every episode takes one person who had everything to lose and lost it: the cancer researcher who trusted the wrong person, the dealer who cooperated with the DEA for six years and called it bad luck, the Border Patrol agent who refused to cooperate and did the time. We don't tell their stories for the shock. We dissect them for the pattern — the rationalization, the language people use on themselves, the four seconds of hearing yourself clearly that separates the people who stayed free from the ones who didn't.

This isn't true crime and it isn't self-help. There's no healing arc, no five steps, no redemption on a schedule. Just the unflinching architecture of self-deception, examined by someone who built her own and did her time taking it apart.

Your host is Deana Martin — the Fairy GodFelon. She's not a doctor or a coach. She's the smartest person who was ever wrong about everything, finally telling the truth. New episodes every two weeks.

Listen close. You're going to recognize someone. The problem is it's going to be you.

Copyright 2026 All rights reserved. ノンフィクション犯罪 人間関係 社会科学
エピソード
  • I'll Choose the Man over the Bear...Every Time.

    I'll Choose the Man over the Bear...Every Time.
    2026/10/06

    My daughter once described online dating as wading through a pile of shit looking for something shiny. I thought that was hilarious enough to climb into a porta-potty and make a reel about it. Nobody watched it. The metaphor wasn't wrong about the pile — it was wrong about the shiny thing. Everybody standing in it thinks they're the one.

    This is the full accounting: the dating profiles that should come with a warning label, the exact moment a man becomes "they," and the three men who actually taught me what pattern recognition costs — Keith, Adam, and Eric. It ends on the bear. You know the one. I'm still picking the man, every time, and I'll tell you exactly why.

    If you've ever built an entire theory about the opposite sex out of one bad profile, this one's for you.

    0:00 The Shiny Thing 1:14 Gentlemen, Your Dating Profile Needs Help 2:23 When "A Man" Becomes "They" 2:43 Categories, Keith, and 25 Years in the Wild 5:11 Adam, Eric, and Mistaking the Opposite for the Answer 8:02 The Bear 9:28 The Real Close

    New solocasts and full episodes drop regularly — subscribe so you don't miss the next one.

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fairygodfelon/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@americanregret Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AmericanRegret
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    10 分
  • What You Do With a Consequence That Was Never Yours?

    What You Do With a Consequence That Was Never Yours?
    2026/10/02
    HOOK Someone else's mess just became your mess. You didn't sign up for it or do anything to deserve it — you happened to be in the room, or the family, or on the lease when their choice became everyone's problem. Suhay was twenty, asleep with her one-year-old, when she turned over and saw a gun pointed at her face. Two days later, the letter came: she'd passed every exam for the Border Patrol Academy, and the federal system no longer wanted her. She lost a career she didn't choose to lose, and fourteen years she never sentenced herself to. The person who got arrested isn't the subject here. The subject is what you do with a consequence that was never yours. THE PATTERN When someone else's choice lands on you — a parent, a partner, a sibling whose decision became your problem — the easiest thing in the world is to spend years building a case against them in your head, pulling it out anytime your own life isn't working. Suhay refuses to do that. She names the pattern she inherited without using her mother's failures as the alibi for it. You don't have to forgive someone to stop running their tab. QUESTIONS THIS EPISODE ANSWERS How do you stop blaming your parents — for everything, for the past, for the patterns you're still repeating?How do you stop repeating the same relationship patterns you watched growing up?What happens to the kids when a parent goes to prison and the consequences land on people who didn't commit the crime?How do you grieve a loss you never had time to mourn because you were keeping everyone else alive?When does having a feeling about someone else's situation cross the line into doing damage? KEY MOMENTS 00:00 — "I just saw a gun pointed in my face." The raid, from the inside, before anything is explained.00:02–00:03 — Twenty years old, refusing to hand over her baby: "I'll step out, but I'm not gonna give you my baby. I'll walk out with my baby." Her grandmother in tears, her brother in a towel, the nanny crying on the floor.00:04 — (Fairy GodFelon) "What do you do with a consequence that is not yours?" The question the episode is built to answer.00:10–00:11 — Two days later, the letter. She'd passed every exam for the Border Patrol Academy. Eliminated from consideration. "Some labels you inherit just by sharing a last name."00:18 — (Fairy GodFelon) Feeling demands a vehicle. Having a feeling about something is not the same as having standing in it. Which side of that gap are you on?00:24 — "I've made the worst choices, and I don't blame my mom." The cleanest line in the conversation. She names the inherited pattern and refuses the alibi in the same breath.00:29 — The homecoming. Martha comes home without telling anyone, the same weekend Suhay gets COVID bad enough to call an ambulance herself. "I opened the door and my mom's standing right there. I thought I'd died and gone to heaven." She hands her mother all four grandkids and leaves for the hospital for three weeks.00:32–00:33 — Why she kept her distance for fourteen years: "Every time I would leave the prison, it was heartbreak again. I would hate it when I got mail from my mom. It's real, and you get to relive it time after time."00:35 — (Fairy GodFelon) The bill on postponed grief. If you kept it together for years because somebody had to, the loss didn't evaporate. It got stored. Pay it slowly, but pay it. THE FAIRY GODFELON TAKE There's a version of this story where Suhay spends fourteen years building a case against her mother — a tidy explanation she could reach for every time her own life wobbled. She had every right to it. She was twenty, holding a baby, with a brother to raise, a grandmother starting to falter, and a career the federal government erased two days after the raid for the crime of sharing a last name. Nobody would have blamed her for being bitter. But here's what she actually does: she names the pattern she inherited — the relationships where the minimum felt like enough, the same shape repeating — and in the same breath she refuses to make her mother responsible for it. "I've made the worst choices, and I don't blame my mom." That distinction is the entire episode. Most of us, when we hear ourselves echo our parents, route it straight through blame: I'm like this because they were like that. It's true, and it's also an off-ramp, and Suhay doesn't take it. You don't have to forgive someone to stop running their tab. You just have to stop reaching for their failure every time you need to explain your own. WHAT TO DO WITH THIS Find the tab you've been running. The parent, the ex, the person whose choice became the thing you've organized your disappointments around. Now separate the two questions you've been keeping fused: what they actually did to you, and what you keep doing with it. The first one might be real and serious and entirely not your fault. The second one belongs to you. You can hold someone fully responsible for the damage they caused and still stop using ...
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    37 分
  • Christa Pike Survived Her Own Execution. Now What? l Solo

    Christa Pike Survived Her Own Execution. Now What? l Solo
    2026/10/02

    I served time with a woman who did something comparably brutal to what put Christa Pike on death row. She's doing twenty-one years at a federal camp. Pike was scheduled to die Wednesday night, and she survived the execution.

    Same government, two eighteen-year-olds, two completely different answers, and a botched execution that raises a harder question than anyone's actually asking.

    I'm not telling you Cinthya Proctor deserved worse, or that Christa Pike deserves less. That's not my call, on either side. What I will tell you is that the standard moves depending on who's standing in front of it. After Wednesday night, I've landed somewhere specific on what should happen to Pike now. You don't have to land there too, but you don't get to call this simple anymore.

    Full show: lp1.americanregret.net/tune-in

    Tags: Christa Pike, Cinthya Proctor, Tennessee execution, death penalty, botched execution, Colleen Slemmer, death row, American Regret, Fairy GodFelon, true crime commentary
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    6 分
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