I'll Choose the Man over the Bear...Every Time.
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I'll Choose the Man over the Bear...Every Time.
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My daughter once described online dating as wading through a pile of shit looking for something shiny. I thought that was hilarious enough to climb into a porta-potty and make a reel about it. Nobody watched it. The metaphor wasn't wrong about the pile — it was wrong about the shiny thing. Everybody standing in it thinks they're the one.
This is the full accounting: the dating profiles that should come with a warning label, the exact moment a man becomes "they," and the three men who actually taught me what pattern recognition costs — Keith, Adam, and Eric. It ends on the bear. You know the one. I'm still picking the man, every time, and I'll tell you exactly why.
If you've ever built an entire theory about the opposite sex out of one bad profile, this one's for you.
0:00 The Shiny Thing 1:14 Gentlemen, Your Dating Profile Needs Help 2:23 When "A Man" Becomes "They" 2:43 Categories, Keith, and 25 Years in the Wild 5:11 Adam, Eric, and Mistaking the Opposite for the Answer 8:02 The Bear 9:28 The Real Close
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