70. Becoming a Secure Leader
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In this insightful episode of The Leader in You, Polina and Dr. Lola Gershfeld sit down with Dr. Jamie Goff, author of The Secure Leader, to explore how attachment science shapes leadership, team relationships, and the emotional culture of the workplace.
Jamie shares her personal journey—from teaching emotionally focused therapy (EFT) to stepping into leadership and realizing how her own attachment patterns showed up in her role as a department chair. A single moment with her administrative assistant (“You have to let me do my job”) became a turning point that opened her eyes to how deeply our relationship histories influence our leadership behaviors.
Together, we explore:
- Why leaders don’t show up at work as “blank slates”—they bring their whole relational history with them
- How avoidant or anxious patterns quietly shape leadership decisions, conflict, and collaboration
- The emotional courage it takes to go beneath the surface and own your fears and needs
- Why emotional attunement and high expectations are not opposites—they strengthen each other
- Practical tools from The Secure Leader to increase emotional awareness, regulate reactivity, and move toward earned security
- How connection creates resilience, clarity, and healthier conversations—even during difficult moments
This episode is warm, relatable, and filled with powerful insights about what it truly means to be a secure leader—one who fosters trust, emotional safety, and a connected culture.
Where to Find Jamie’s Work
- Website: drjamiegoff.com
- Book: The Secure Leader
The Leader in You is the go-to podcast for anyone who wants to create a workplace culture where you can thrive.
Envision a future where you are more grounded, confident, and in sync with your team.
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Connect with Dr. Lola Gershfeld:
LinkedIn: Dr. Lola Gershfeld
Instagram: @drlolaemc
Connect with Polina Marian:
LinkedIn: Polina Marian
Instagram: @livewithfivekids
Dr. Lola Gershfeld, a distinguished organizational psychologist, has dedicated her career to delving into the intricate layers of employee engagement, team ...