
7: The System for Maintaining Adult Friendships with Lauren Smart
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Hot tip for maintaining adult friendships: Move to different cities, never ask who texted last, and consider a blood pact. That’s more or less the system Lauren and I have followed for 17 years—and it’s worked. Today, we’re breaking down how.
In this episode of The System for Everything, I’m joined by one of my longest-standing friendships: Lauren Smart. She's a journalism professor, an arts writer, and someone who's had a front-row seat to my entire adult life. We became friends at 22, and somehow—through new jobs, new cities, a lot of karaoke, and one of us (me) developing a codependent relationship with Google Calendar—we’ve stayed maintained a friendship for nearly two decades.
We unpack what it really takes to maintain friendships through your 20s, 30s, and beyond, including:
- The secret to surviving "Boyfriend Island" seasons
- Why meme-sharing and sending that “Hi!” text really matter
- What makes a friendship worth the effort as you grow older