
#45: Anger: I Am Not Angry at Sam For Being Sick, Just the Two "Peace Officers" that Allowed Him to Freeze to Death
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In my opinion, any emotion we carry after losing a Son or a daughter is valid. I know that anger is a common emotion after losing a kid to addiction because there is so much chaos and disbelief that we could not save them, but I have never felt angry towards Sam, just fear that I would lose him.
In this episode, I discuss why I am not angry at Sam, how much I identify with him, and why I think the cops that arrested him that night could have done a better job than to drop him off at the train station with no shoes or warm clothes on a sub-zero night. As a society, we have to be better than this. If either cop had known Sam or had true compassion, things could have turned out differently.
I live with so much confusion and pain but I don't blame Sam, I blame the perfect storm that became his life and took him from me. I have lots of unanswered questions, no gains from figuring them out, and this is another stifling and tragic part of losing him to addiction.