
11. Can a Man Ever Do Equal Housework to Mom?
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I value equality and have always tried to do my part of the housework, especially after we had our baby. But I wasn’t trained to see how much work there is, and how much unseen work my wife did every day. I especially didn’t understand how much thinking she was doing to hold it all together. That invisible labor and mental load began wearing her down and building resentment between us. The Fair Play system of household management changed everything.
In this episode, I share how we implemented Fair Play at home—not just to divide chores, but to shift how we communicate, show up, and build trust as co-parents. From setting minimum standards of care to scheduling weekly check-ins, this system gave us more than just fairness. It gave us time back for ourselves, our daughter, and the creative stuff we used to love. If either partner in a marriage doesn’t feel the household work is 100% balanced, then you need Fair Play!
In this episode, we discuss:
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What is the Fair Play system of household management, and why is it a game-changer for modern dads?
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How do you divide household labor without resentment?
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Why do women carry the “mental load” and how men can relieve it
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What is the CPE model and how does it stop nagging fights before they start?
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How can couples use “business meetings” to stop blowing up over chores?
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Why minimum standards of care can prevent 90% of conflict at home
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How to create space for self-care and personal growth through better balance
The Fair Play Deck: A Couple's Conversation Deck: https://amzn.to/44iV3Zv
The Fair Play Book: https://amzn.to/4ltfKsm
Being dadicated isn’t about having all the answers.
It’s about showing up.
It’s about committing to the kind of dad—and man—you want to be, even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.
Joe Carr is a dad to Della, husband to Serenity, co-founder of Serenity Kids baby food, and the voice behind Dadicated Joe.
Follow Joe Carr on social media
Instagram: @dadicatedjoe
TikTok: @dadicatedjoe
YouTube @dadicatedjoe