holidays are never the problem.!!! they are SO SO NEEDED and after a loooong year of being so switched on, demanding deadlines... the list goes on...

its a nice time of year to just *** ahhh***

so how about we learn how to still prioritize our goals, while living our best life

it all starts here; ditching your all or nothing mindset...

• “you think you lose control in december… but december is the only month you’re actually honest.”

• “it’s not the food. it’s the pressure you put on yourself around the food.”

• “most women don’t blow out because of the event. they blow out because of the story they tell themselves before the event.”

• “the holidays don’t cause weight gain. panic does.”

this isnt about the end of year... because tbh its not THAT different from the rest...

in that theres always SOMETHING happening. life is going to always be happening.

→ “you’ll stop "screwing it" when you stop trying to ‘be good.’”
→ “you’ll enjoy the holidays more when you stop making the night about food.”
→ “you’ll feel more in control when you stop trying to control everything.”

in this episode, we’re talking about the real reason you spiral with food when december hits — not because you “love food too much,” not because you “have no discipline,” but because no one ever taught you how to navigate social events, boundaries, family pressure, restaurant calories, or travel like an actual human.

inside you’ll learn:• how to enjoy events without blowing out• the skill of “pick your poison”• the boundary scripts that keep you in your power (without offending anyone)• how to deal with family comments + food pushers• how to plan meals without feeling restricted• why you don’t need to start over in january• how to stop making every event about food• and the 5 habits that change everything year-round

this isn’t a diet episode.
this is a life skills episode.

you’ll walk away knowing exactly how to enjoy the holidays, protect your progress, and set yourself up for a 2026 that doesn’t start with guilt, panic, or a crash diet.

you don’t need more willpower.
you just need better tools.
and i’m giving them to you here.

the shape you want won’t come from another deficit.

and if your brain just screamed “but i don’t want to gainweight” you really need to hear this.

this episode dives into the messier parts of progress:
→ maintenance that doesn’t look like “holding steady”
→ eating more when you’re scared to
→ training without chasing scale drops

you’ll hear how one of my clients navigated all of it—andthe shifts she made when tracking became exhausting and her body wasn’tchanging.

we talk about that quiet frustration of eating well,tracking, showing up… but your body isn’t changing the way you want it to.
→ and the truth is, it’s not that your effort doesn’t matter. it’s that thephase you’re in doesn’t match your goal.

this is your wake-up call to stop flip-flopping betweendiets and finally understand the role of real maintenance, muscle, andlong-term change.

we unpack:
• why tracking isn’t working like it used to
• how to spot if your progress has stalled from stress, not food

• why most women mistake tracking for control
• what to expect during real recomposition (hint: it’s not fast)

two powerful wins you’ll get from this episode:
➝ how to detach from the scale and still trackmeaningful progress
➝ how to make the maintenance phase actually work foryou

→ want to come on and talk about your story? message meanytime.

find me @transformxruby on Instagram

@coachcarmenhayward
apply for a free consult:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfqaxMDfbPYPYVui3BgSClnDXTj4BWjRvPkbBHuK5CP7SQsIw/viewform?usp=sf_link
direct link to dm me on ig: https://ig.me/m/transformxruby

If you’re 40+, feeling like your metabolism tanked, or thinking your body just doesn’t respond the way it used to, this episode is for you.

Because maybe it’s not about hormones. Or cardio. Or your macros.Maybe the real issue is that you never built the baseline your body needed in the first place.

We break down the real reasons women feel stuck in their 40s—why fat loss gets harder, why reverse dieting doesn’t work if you never actually built, why you feel tired but not stronger, and how cardio might be working against you.

No fluff. No BS. Just a straight-up conversation about what matters most if you want to change your body composition—without sacrificing your energy, your confidence, or your sanity.

so many women feel like anything over 1600 calories is too much. theyre obviously scared to do it alone...

we go deep into:

• why maintenance feels so damn hard (and how to stop sabotaging it)

• the myth of “stubborn bodies” and what’s actually in your way

• how to know if you’re doing the right thing—but not doing it long enough

• why eating more doesn’t work if you never trained to grow

• what changed everything for her when she stopped trying to look toned and started training for strength

this one is raw, real, and going to hit you where it needs to.

2 mini wins you’ll walk away with:

• how to shift from “I just want to tone up” to actually building muscle

• how to measure progress in a way that actually works for your season, your goals... bc old ways wont work.

find me @transformxruby on instagram
@

Apply for a free consult:https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfqaxMDfbPYPYVui3BgSClnDXTj4BWjRvPkbBHuK5CP7SQsIw/viewform?usp=sf_link
Direct link to DM me on IG: https://ig.me/m/transformxruby

learn how to get lean after 35 by resetting your metabolism, building strength, and ditching scale obsession for real, sustainable body change.---

if you're over 35 and still think eating less and doing more is the key to getting lean — it’s time to reset everything. in this episode, we dive deep into what it actually takes to build a lean, defined body as a woman in your late 30s, 40s and beyond.

we break down the truth about metabolism, hormones, and why obsessing over the scale is sabotaging your progress. you’ll learn why maintenance isn’t a pause in progress, but the phase where real physique change begins. we’ll also talk about strength training, mindset shifts, emotional regulation, and how to train smarter — not harder.

if you've been stuck in the 1200-calorie trap, chasing tone but feeling burnt out, this episode is your wake-up call. because the real flex isn’t being skinny — it’s building a body that feels strong, healthy and sustainable for life.

what we cover:
• why your scale weight is lying to you
• building muscle without “bulking”
• the hormone + metabolism shifts after 35
• how to reset your mindset to finally see results
• redefining progress beyond weight loss

👉 ready to stop yo-yoing and start building real results? follow us on instagram [@transformxruby], or apply for coaching [link here] to learn how we help women get lean without losing their minds.

#fatlossafter35 #buildmuscle #womensfitness #strongnotskinny #tonedbody #muscleovercardio #strengthtrainingwomen #fitover40 #hormonehealth #metabolismboost

the lean look is built in maintenance calories or above, not a deficit. here’s why eating more and training smarter is the real path to strength, shape + lasting change.

this is why maintenance isn't maintenance. its not maintaining. its creating.

you want to get lean, strong and sculpted — but your approach is keeping you stuck. in this episode, we unpack the maintenance paradox: the idea that most women are chasing a physique built through fueling, lifting and maintaining… while stuck in endless dieting, cardio and chasing the scale.

we break down why the lean, defined look doesn’t come from cutting forever — it comes from building muscle in a phase your brain thinks is “doing nothing.” you’ll learn why maintenance isn’t a holding tank, it’s the actual path to lasting body change. and we’ll show you how to rewire your mindset so you stop sabotaging results with short-term strategies.

if you’re constantly jumping back into a deficit, scared to eat more, or feel like progress stalls when you stop “doing more,” this one’s for you.

what we cover:
• why the look you want is built, not lost
• how maintenance creates muscle, shape + definition
• scale obsession vs physique development
• mindset shifts for fueling + training effectively
• breaking the restrict-binge cycle with smart phases

👉 ready to build lean muscle and stop chasing fat loss forever? follow us on instagram [https://www.instagram.com/transformxruby/] or apply for coaching [link] to work with us.

inside, we reframe maintenance as a skill: eating enough to lift heavy, hit protein, manage stress and sleep, without spiraling into all-or-nothing. you’ll learn how to use simple metrics beyond the scale, why body recomp happens best when you’re fed, and how to program training so performance drives physique. we also cover cognitive biases that derail you, like perfectionism, catastrophizing and deadline thinking, plus a body neutrality approach that keeps you consistent when change feels slow.

#maintenancephase #buildlean #strengthtrainingwomen #metabolismreset #musclesculpting #fitover35 #tonednottiny #womensfitness #bodyrecomp #fatlossmindset

we both chased lean via fat loss only

holding ourselves to the scale

You’re not going to calorie deficit your way to your dream body. That tight, lean, sculpted look you want? It comes from adding lean muscle tissue, not just shedding weight. Most women are stuck chasing smaller scale numbers and feeling stuck when their body doesn’t actually change. They think they need to lose more fat to look better. What they actually need is more muscle to fill out the shape they want—especially in their 30s, 40s, and 50s. If you want curves, if you want definition, if you want to feel strong in your body? That doesn’t come from less. It comes from building.

You will need multiple long building phases—not just one.

One 12-week bulk isn’t going to cut it. A few months of eating more while doing booty band workouts won’t give you the lean athletic look you want. You’re going to need multiple building seasons, each at least 6–12 months long. And that’s before you even cut. Sarah said it took her 2+ years of consistent building to see a real physique change. This is not a one-and-done strategy. It’s a layered, repeated commitment—and you will need patience, a plan, and a hell of a lot of consistency.

Most women are stuck dieting in their heads, even when they’re not technically in a deficit.

You’re eating cucumbers and calling it lunch. You’re still thinking every meal needs to be low-calorie, low-fat, and tracked within an inch of its life. Even in maintenance, you’re mentally dieting. That mindset is killing your progress. If you’re living like you’re dieting—you’ll never feel free. And if you’re mentally restricting, you’ll never fully commit to building. Your body reflects the beliefs you still hold. And if those beliefs are stuck in the 1200-calorie, WW points, clean eating era? Your body will be too.

for me ..... the problem was I still didn’t look good naked. I didn’t have a more defined body. I had to fatloss and feel really restricted, my training suffers, my sleep……. So I was stalling my own potential to add more muscle. I never learned how to trust myself to be back on track rather than thinking I need to diet every time the scale goes up 5-7 lbs. I never practiced adherence and redirection. I just used the bandaid of fatloss.Well that sht got in my way.I wasn’t enhancing my physique. I wasn’t recomping much.I was frustrated as hell about how much “work” I was doing for very small ROI.

MAN i have a WHOLE HEAP of actionable simple steps for you packed in todays episode description… so if youre feeling so generous as to return the seasonal favour… please pass this episode along to a friend and also… let me know if this has benefitted you in any way

THIS is the kinda stuff that forms the core of my coaching… and why those who go all in are not only successful physically, but their career, relationships, quality of life, energy + confidence EXPAND
Nothing is worse than feeling like you’re doing “everything” but the needle. still. won’t. move?...
this episode is your antidote to the “why isn’t it working yet?” spiral. we unpack why progress starts underground (roots before flowers), why your $1 daily deposits beat flashy before/afters, and how skill beats sweat when it comes to lifting and nutrition.

• film one lift and write: where did i feel it? what breaks down? what will i change next set?
• pick 3 deposits you’ll log daily (protein, steps, bedtime)
• if you are choosing to diet… first write your post-diet skeleton: training days, steps, first meal, bedtime—what stays no matter what
.• set a “life is cray cray” minimum: 20 minutes, 2 exercises, or a walk before dinner.

we talk about the invisible phase (roots growing under the surface), the power of micro wins, why filming lifts beats chasing the burn, and how to keep momentum when life explodes.
The importance of understanding; deliberate practice (not random reps), deposits vs leaks (stop ignoring the small wins), time management in real life (kids, traffic, curveballs), cardio vs lifting in a deficit (protect recovery), and why the scale lies during recomp (glycogen, stress, cycle swings). we also break down goodhart’s law
the chase results - lose drive and motivation trap… where you are chasing so hard you move further away
So you stop repeating the things that kept you from results… and finally build a body that is stress-proof and life-proof.

• if the scale didn’t exist, how would you prove progress this week?
• where will you keep your promise to yourself when life gets messy?

• choose one lift to deliberately practice and fix one thing only.
• make a deposits vs leaks note: 3 deposits you’ll do; 1 leak you’ll plug.

if this landed, drop a comment with your biggest “aha,” save it for later, or share it with a friend who’s stuck in all-or-nothing.
want to come on and chat about your journey or a struggle you’re navigating? i’d love that—message me.

find me @transformxruby on instagram @
apply for a free consult: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfqaxMDfbPYPYVui3BgSClnDXTj4BWjRvPkbBHuK5CP7SQsIw/viewform?usp=sf_link
direct link to dm me on ig:https://ig.me/m/transformxruby

Why This MattersMini wins to try today:What We Talk AboutA couple of question prompts to sit with:Want more action steps you can implement right away?If this landedConnect