Why can’t I just shower?

If you’ve ever found yourself Googling “how to make myself brush my teeth” at two in the morning. Still in pajamas, wishing things could be different, this book was made for you.

You’re not lazy. You’re not broken. And you’re definitely not alone.

Millions of people struggle with basic self-care when living with ADHD, executive dysfunction, depression, anxiety, autism, or other mental health and neurodivergent challenges. For you, the “simple” routines everyone else seems to manage can feel like scaling a mountain in bare feet. The result? Shame, secrecy, and a lot of late-night frustration.

This book is here to change that.

Inside, you’ll find:

• Real, relatable stories from people just like you
• The science behind why daily tasks feel so hard—and why willpower isn’t the answer
• Gentle, practical tools to help you take action (without shame or guilt)
• Humor, validation, and encouragement

No lectures. No “just do it” pep talks. No miracle routines.

This is not a drill-sergeant guide or a book that tells you to wake up at 5 a.m. and drink green smoothies. It’s a supportive companion to help you understand your brain, let go of shame, and experiment with small steps that fit your life. You can skip around, listen out of order, and use only what helps you. If you lose the book for a month under a pile of laundry, that’s okay. There are no wrong ways to use it.

Whether you live with these challenges yourself or want to better understand a loved one’s struggle, you’ll find compassion and concrete help here.

Let’s figure this out together, one shower (or skipped shower) at a time.