The Hidden Barriers That Stop You From Asking for What You Need

Discover how our own mental habits, like mind reading and second-guessing, hinder our ability to communicate effectively and build confidence. This episode shares practical insights on shifting from internal chatter to direct conversations that empower us.

Key topics:

- The impact of pre-verbal self-doubt on communication

- How mind reading and anticipation create barriers

- The importance of asking questions rather than assuming

- Checking in with others to foster clarity

- The role of self-awareness in building self-authority

- Practical tips to stop overthinking and start authentic conversations

- The connection between self-trust and effective communication

- Introducing Pam Lippet and her approach to self-awareness

Timestamps:

00:00 - Introduction to the episode and why women often hesitate to speak up
02:30 - Pam’s childhood and discovery of her voice through theater and debate
05:15 - How early experiences shape communication skills and confidence
08:45 - Navigating gender dynamics in professional settings
12:05 - The importance of preparation and presentation in meetings
15:42 - Overcoming internalized messages about women’s roles and expectations
18:55 - Examples of women supporting or self-sabotaging each other in the workplace
22:07 - How to handle miscommunication or language barriers effectively
26:45 - The power of transparency in workload and project management
30:05 - Strategies for asserting oneself without fear of being wrong
33:25 - The difference between striving for perfection and authentic self-expression
36:30 - Embracing vulnerability and owning mistakes as part of growth
40:15 - Building resilience through the ebbs and flows of confidence
43:20 - Ending conversations with clarity and self-validation
47:00 - The cultural expectation of women apologizing and its impact
50:50 - Practical steps women can take to lead with confidence and authenticity
53:21 - Final encouragement: progress over perfection and continuous growth

Pam Lippitt is CEO/Chief Communicator of Pamela Lippitt Communications, LLC (formerly The Hill Street Group), and is a public speaker, corporate trainer and coach helping people improve their communication skills. She helps each client maximize their voice, creating confident, savvy leaders.

Pam has been speaking in front of audiences since she was a teenager and is comfortable in front of large and small groups alike. She is currently host of the podcast “Communication is an Art”. She is a proud University of Michigan graduate (Go Blue) with a degree in Communications.

Resources & Links:

Connect with Pam Lippet!

Website: https://www.pamelalippitt.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/pamelalippitt/

Instagram: @pamelalippitt.communications

Connect with Elaine!

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/elainebelsonlcsw

Free Discovery Call: https://zcal.co/esbelsonlcswc/15min

Website: https://www.TheSelfAuthorityCoach.com

Pantene Sorry Commercial: https://youtu.be/TcGKxLJ4ZGI?si=UotIdN0hFcK_jJi8

Unlocking Self-Authority: Master Your Self-Talk and Create the Life You Deserve

Discover how shifting your inner dialogue and practicing presence can empower you to overcome limiting beliefs, handle stress, and live authentically. Lee, a self-leadership strategist, shares her transformative journey and actionable tools to help women step into their full potential.

00:00 – Introduction to self-authority and Lee’s story

01:14 – The power of self-talk and its impact on mental health

02:08 – Reframing negative thoughts: strategies for empowerment

03:36 – Childhood reflections: the mirror work and self-love

04:34 – Recognizing voices: mom, dad, and your authentic internal voice

05:31 – Turning depression around through presence and intentionality

07:55 – Rediscovering passion and aligning with your true self

09:12 – The Reactor to Creator framework explained

11:49 – How reacting vs. creating influences your life outcomes

13:22 – The importance of self-love and visualizing future success

17:09 – Controlling perceptions vs. accepting the illusion of control

18:36 – Developing the habit of response and intentional action

21:03 – Addressing imposter syndrome: reframing and real-world examples

23:07 – Why women especially struggle with imposter syndrome & overcoming comparisonitis

27:10 – The dangers of social comparison and embracing your unique path

29:49 – The value of presence and staying in the "here and now"

31:23 – How to embody your future successful self using visualization

34:41 – Self-validation: reasons and techniques to become your own cheerleader

36:29 – Mirror work and recognizing your inner genius, gifts, and greatness

38:46 – Overcoming the fear of failure by shifting self-criticism into self-love

43:49 – Embracing mistakes and humanity as key to growth

45:17 – Lee’s free resource: The 5-minute Self-Talk Reset at http://rewriteyourselftalk.com

Ly Smith helps women executives stop reacting and start creating life on their terms. As Self-Leadership Strategist with UpCycle Coaching and founder of the G3 Collective, Ly uses her 30yrs of personal development studies, positive psychology and NLP certification to lead as a member of the Thought Council w/ C-Suite Network. She has helped clients grow revenue by over 30%, break through sales blocks, and transform people pleasing and procrastination into actionable confidence. Her message is simple: Change your self-talk, Change your results!

Free Gift: 5-Minute Reset http://www.rewriteyourselftalk.com

Website: http://www.upcyclecoaching.com

LinkedIn: /g3mastermind

Podcast: https://talks.co/ly

Book Ly: https://bit.ly/zoomwithly

Services: Keynote, Corporate Workshop Facilitator, Breakout Session, G3 Accountability

Connect with Elaine!

LinkedIn: / elainebelsonlcsw

Free Discovery Call: https://zcal.co/esbelsonlcswc/15min

Website: https://www.TheSelfAuthorityCoach.com

Elaine Belson talks with coach and podcast host Leann Herron about rebuilding her life after multiple upheavals at 45, including the end of a 20-year marriage, leaving a misaligned career, bankruptcy, and becoming an empty nester.

Leann describes how abandonment and betrayal trauma fueled people-pleasing, loss of identity, and difficulty using her voice, and shares experiences of infidelity, family betrayal involving a custody battle, and workplace invalidation that culminated in severe panic and quitting her job.

She explains how stepping away allowed her to focus on healing through meditation, breathwork, nutrition, somatic and energy-based practices, and learning tools to regulate anxiety, set boundaries, and trust instincts. Leanne now coaches others, emphasizing that healing is coming home to yourself and giving yourself permission to change.

00:00 When Life Collapses

01:14 Leanne’s Fresh Start

03:18 Losing Identity

05:38 Roots of Abandonment

07:46 Betrayal Trauma Unpacked

11:27 Workplace Trigger Spiral

15:18 Trust Your Gut

18:57 Healing After Quitting

23:33 Tools Beyond Talk Therapy

26:19 Energy Work and Voice

30:58 Coaching and New Life

35:25 Advice at Crossroads

39:22 Starting Over With Power

42:59 Key Takeaways and Closing

Leann Herron is a Certified Life and Holistic Health Coach, founder of Finding Resilience with Leann, and the Host of the Happiness On Tap podcast. She is a passionate advocate for women's health and empowerment, specializing in guiding midlife women to break free from the cycle of over-giving and the stories that keep them stuck, to manage stress, and to enhancing their overall well-being so they can create a life that truly fulfills them—body, mind, and spirit.

Leann has a deep background in trauma recovery, holistic health, and personal development. She has helped numerous women break free from the cycle of over-giving and step into a life of balance, joy, and purpose. Through her women-centered transformative 90-day programs, she empowers women to finally say YES to themselves—without guilt.

Connect with Leann!

Website: https://findingresiliencewithleann.com

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/leannherron/

Podcast – Happiness On Tap: https://findingresiliencewithleann.com/podcast

Connect with Elaine!

LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/elainebelsonlcsw

Free Discovery Call: https://zcal.co/esbelsonlcswc/15min

Website: https://www.TheSelfAuthorityCoach.com