In this powerful episode of The Stroke It Podcast, host Jenny Townsend welcomes Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, an experienced clinical psychologist, speaker, and author, who brings decades of wisdom on parenting, relationships, and emotional healing.

Dr. Gloria takes a deep dive into how cultural norms have shaped boys to suppress emotions, teaching them to be tough instead of tender. While once seen as survival skills, these outdated expectations are now harming marriages, fatherhood, and children’s development. 💔

Drawing from her impactful books “Read, Reflect, Respond: The Three R’s of Growth and Change” and “How Not to F-Up Being a Father”, she shares practical tools for parents and partners to:
✅ Encourage boys to express the full range of emotions
✅ Replace “stop crying” with validation and compassion
✅ Strengthen marriages through emotional intimacy and self-awareness
✅ Use journaling and creative methods as healing practices
✅ Break harmful generational cycles of emotional suppression

Listeners will hear thought-provoking insights on how fathers influence emotional growth, why emotional intelligence starts in infancy, and how men can reclaim the tenderness that society has denied them. Dr. Gloria also introduces the “empty chair” method, a therapeutic practice to process unresolved emotions, and explains why teaching children early to feel safe expressing themselves is essential for lifelong mental health.

✨ Whether you’re a parent, leader, or spouse, this episode is packed with life-changing lessons to help you build stronger families, healthier relationships, and a more emotionally aware future.

Chapters

0:00: Introduction to Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst
2:15: Why boys are taught to suppress emotions
5:40: Stress, commitment, and the weight of relationships
9:05: Journaling as a tool for growth and healing
12:18: “Show me” vs. “Tell me” in teaching kids emotional awareness
15:42: Cultural shame around crying and tenderness in boys
19:10: Emotional suppression as survival in the past—why it’s harmful now
22:33: Fathers’ influence on emotional growth in early childhood
26:15: Replacing “stop crying” with validation and presence
30:02: Love languages, intimacy, and emotional connection in marriage
33:28: Healing father-son relationships with awareness and openness
37:10: The “empty chair” method for processing unresolved pain
40:45: Mothers’ role in modeling and encouraging emotional expression
43:58: Emotional safety from infancy to adolescence
47:15: Insights from How Not to F-Up Being a Father
50:10: Final reflections on family, faith, and emotional growth

Connect with Dr. Vanderhorst:

Website: https://drvanderhorst.com/
Facebook: @drvanderhorst

Order Stroke It now at jennyaldaytownsend.com/book. Your order includes a signed copy, shipping and handling, and great Bonus items!

Follow the Stroke It Guide on socials to stay connected and to get tips on how you too can get your STROKE on'!

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jennyaldaytownsend/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thestrokeitguide

Check out more about Jenny Alday Townsend by visiting http://www.jennyaldaytownsend.com

Did you know there are free downloads available on my website? Go to All Products | Jenny Alday Townsend and snag the 4 Ground Rules to Elevate your life. Planning your future? Develop your 1-3-5 and change your life path!