Another one from the Sudbury box that reads like half a weather report and half a late-night infomercial. It begins with someone solemnly tuned to the “hot chocolate channel,” explaining how to make your cocoa the exact temperature you desire — and, when it cools, how to rescue it with a scoop of something Bootstuck calls hotener. Caleb is dispatched to “boil up another pot” while the rest of the room debates whether a glass will do the job.

The day turns stranger fast. Background noise (a “ruffle kerfuffle”) and what sound like two old ladies trading barbs bleed into a description of the morning: the speaker claims the sky was on fire, the woods briefly glowing red, then the birds coming out and singing in a language no one else understands. Our narrator’s job is revealed—self-appointed weather tracker and jacket-adviser for a town where everyone owns one jacket, so his utility is, at best, ceremonial.

Food and ritual thread through the tape: gravy with optional hotener becomes breakfast, and the idea of sipping medicinalized beverages is treated as perfectly ordinary. The recording collapses into familiar Bootstuck chaos — insults, a demand to “kick my ass,” and someone yelling they have to make coffee and toast — leaving the listener less informed than when they started, but oddly hungry and a little warmer for it.

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