CHAPTER 20:

FEAR IS FOR SUCKERS

We tiptoe through life hoping to safely make it to death.

—Unknown

When I lived in New Mexico, a friend of mine took me to this cave she’d heard

about up in the Jemez Mountains. “It’s more like a big hole in the ground,

actually,” she said, “but I hear it’s pretty cool.” She didn’t do a great job of

selling it, especially when she got to the part about how we’d have to crawl

around on all fours the whole time, but I wasn’t really listening to her anyway.

Caves don’t interest me, no matter what size they are; I was only going for the

road trip and the hike through the mountains and this great burger place that I

discovered the last time I was up there. The cave was just a necessary part of the

trip, like stopping for gas.

CHAPTER 19:

THE DRAMA OF OVERWHELM

I have lived a long life and had many troubles, most of which never

happened.

—Mark Twain; American author, humorist

When I set out to write a new book, I find it very helpful to start with a separate

index card for each chapter. I put the chapter title at the top of each card, write

my notes in the space underneath, and then spread them all out on a table so I

can see the whole thing at once.

CHAPTER 18:

PROCRASTINATION, PERFECTION, AND A POLISH

BEER GARDEN

In order to kick ass you must first lift up your foot.

—Jen Sincero; author, coach, self-quoter

One of my first jobs out of college was production coordinator for the Ethnic

Folk Arts Festival, which was put on by a little nonprofit group in New York

City. I heard about the position opening up from a friend, and decided I had to

have the job even though I’d never produced a thing in my life and find folk art

to be fairly yawnable. It looked like fun anyway—they worked out of a funky

loft in Tribeca, knew a lot about music, brought their dogs to work, and the

festival I’d be working on gathered musicians, dancers, and artists from around

the globe and brought them together in a Polish beer garden in Queens for a big

fat party. Which meant men in skirts and free sausage and beer.

PART 4:

HOW TO GET

OVER YOUR B.S.

ALREADY

CHAPTER 17:

IT’S SO EASY ONCE YOU FIGURE OUT IT ISN’T

HARD

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

—Albert Einstein; scientist, awesomist

I was hanging out in my sunny California home one morning, reading the

newspaper with the doors flung open and the stereo blasting, when all of a

sudden a bird came tearing into my living room. He was flapping around like a

maniac, flying into lamps and plants, spreading leaves, feathers, poop, and panic

all over the place.

CHAPTER 16:

LOOSEN YOUR BONE, WILMA

You don’t paddle against the current, you paddle with it.

And if you get good at it, you throw away the oars.

—Kris Kristofferson; singer, songwriter, actor, Rhodes scholar, still

super hot for an old guy

Several years ago I went on a life-changing trip to India. In case you haven’t

witnessed it yourself, India is heaving with life, a swarming blur of vibrant

colors, honking cars, wandering cows, packed trains, endless slums, elaborate

palaces, ancient temples, and sweet smelling incense.

CHAPTER 15:

FORGIVE OR FESTER

Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past.

—Lily Tomlin; actress, writer, comedienne, absurdist

When is the last time you physically hurt yourself? What did you do to get the

pain to stop? And how long did you wait to do something about it? When we’re

in physical pain, we’re usually extremely proactive about figuring out how to

make it go away immediately because, you know, it hurts. Even if we have to go

through more pain from pouring a disinfectant that stings on an open wound or

suffering through getting stitches, we do it, right away, because we’re very

focused on our ultimate goal: relief.

CHAPTER 14:

GRATITUDE: THE GATEWAY DRUG TO

AWESOMENESS

When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears.

—Anthony Robbins; author, speaker, motivator, life-changer

When I was a little kid, my parents made my brothers and sister and I answer the

phone in this very formal way, “Jennifer Sincero speaking,” as if, between

fighting over who got to play with the Big Wheel and stuffing balloons down our

pants, we were all running our own private concierge businesses.

CHAPTER 13:

GIVE AND LET GIVE

It is one of the beautiful compensations in this life that no one can sincerely

try to help another without helping himself.

—RalphWaldo Emerson; American poet, essayist, visionary, giver

One day while driving somewhere with my family, we stopped off at a store

along the way and told my niece, then five years old, that she could get herself a

little sumthin’. She came up to the register with a six-pack of orange Tic Tacs

and charmed her way into getting the whole thing, instead of being told to put it

back and just buy one