You’ve Been Arguing With Someone Who Was Never There | It’s Not Possible
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You can't fully know the people closest to you, yet you keep arguing with someone who was never there. In relationship psychology, damage starts when contact stops correcting your picture of someone. In 1977, Mark Snyder showed how expectation steers human behavior into a self-fulfilling prophecy. Negativity bias and confirmation bias freeze old verdicts; rehearsing conversations in your head turns overthinking into a fight the other person never joined, and grief takes the witness who knew you.
📞 Social Perception and Interpersonal Behavior — Mark Snyder, Elizabeth Decker Tanke and Ellen Berscheid (1977)
🧠 Diagnostic Value Underlies Asymmetric Updating of Impressions in the Morality and Ability Domains — Peter Mende-Siedlecki, Sean G. Baron and Alexander Todorov (2013)
🕯️ Confidence, Not Consistency, Characterizes Flashbulb Memories — Jennifer M. Talarico and David C. Rubin (2003)
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