Are affairs just about sex? It's the question people jump to the second they hear the word affair, and after last week's conversation with Dr. Marie Murphy, I wanted to go deeper with my own answer.

Yes, sex plays a role. We crave intimacy and connection, and some people go looking for it because they're not getting any of it at home. I get it. Physical intimacy is a non-negotiable for me too. But if my affair had only been about sex, it never would have lasted as long as it did. You reach a point with someone where you either like who they are or you don't, and the sex can't carry that.

I get into why so many people are so curious about affairs in the first place, how attraction works when it's instant versus when it grows, and why so many women never discover what their body is actually capable of until they're with someone who wants to enjoy it with them. This is one of the more personal ones, and at 48 it still feels strange to feel awkward talking about the most primal thing two people can do.

Affairs tap into a level of intimacy, physical and emotional, that people are craving and not getting anywhere else. That's the part nobody discusses while they're busy with the scandal of it all.

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