Why Do I Feel Guilty When I'm Happy? | The Grief Guardian Podcast - Episode 74

Can you be happy while grieving?

After losing someone you love, happiness can sometimes feel wrong.

You laugh. You enjoy yourself. You have a good day. Maybe you even forget about your grief for a little while.

Then the guilt arrives:

“How can I be happy when they're not here?”

In this episode of The Grief Guardian Podcast, I talk about my own experience with this after losing my daughter, Mia.

Our first Christmas after losing Mia was in 2022. We chose not to celebrate because we didn't want to put ourselves into an environment where everyone else was celebrating while we were grieving. Later, I found something unexpected through training. When I was focused on moving, learning and doing what I needed to do, I could experience joy without feeling guilty.

Over time, I came to understand that happiness doesn't mean moving on.

It doesn't mean forgetting.

It doesn't mean you love the person you lost any less.

You can be happy with your life while still being heartbroken that the person you love isn't here to experience it with you.

For me, the biggest shift came when I realised that I wasn't living without Mia. I was living for Mia.

I get to experience the things she doesn't.

I get to see the places she never will.

I get to have the experiences we should have had together.

And I believe she would want me to live every day to its fullest.

As grief begins to heal, there can be more room for love. You don't have to remain sad all the time to prove how much someone meant to you.

You can miss someone terribly and still have a good day.

If you're grieving and you've recently felt guilty for laughing, enjoying yourself or simply having a good day, I hope this episode reminds you that you haven't betrayed the person you lost.

You're still grieving.

You're still loving them.

You're just living too.

About The Grief Guardian

The Grief Guardian exists to help people navigate life after loss.

Through honest conversations, personal experiences and practical ideas around grief and healing, my goal is simple:

To help you find a way to live again without leaving the person you lost behind.

If this episode helps you, please consider sharing it with someone who might need to hear it.

You never know who is quietly struggling with the guilt of feeling happy again.

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