In this episode of Messy Social Work, Tim and Rich begin with a conversation about shame, connection, and the ways we "make our own social worlds". Reflecting on Margaret Wheatley's work, they explore how small acts of openness can shape relationships, meetings, and everyday interactions.

They are then joined by Jordel Bennett, fatherhood advocate, trainer, family group decision-making facilitator and lived-experience practitioner. Drawing on his experience growing up in London as a Black Caribbean man, becoming a young father, studying law, and supporting fathers navigating child protection and family court processes, Jordel offers a powerful perspective on how fathers experience helping systems.

Together they discuss:

• Why fathers are often treated as an "add-on" rather than a core part of family life
• Trust, risk and why some fathers find it difficult to engage with professionals
• The difference between being child-focused and case-focused
• How social workers can build stronger relationships with fathers and paternal families
• The role of family networks, identity and belonging in children's lives
• The importance of curiosity, humanity and inclusive practice

The episode concludes with a reading from Rainer Maria Rilke's Letters to a Young Poet, reflecting on fear, sadness and the possibility that what troubles us most may be asking for understanding rather than avoidance.

"Perhaps everything that frightens us is, in its deepest essence, something helpless that wants our love."

A thoughtful conversation about fathers, relationships, participation, and what more inclusive social work might look like.