What If Healing Starts With Looking Back
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Season 2, episode 25
We go back through an unexpected “rabbit hole” that starts with a photo request and ends with me rereading the goodbye texts I sent when I left the police. I unpack how PTSD twisted my memory into feeling abandoned, and how those messages and my progress since then remind me I’m still moving forward.
• running out of phone storage and stumbling into old messages from 2019 to 2021
• the group text I sent on my last day in the police and what it brings up
• feeling like I had leprosy and why that belief made sense at the time
• rereading colleagues’ replies and realising people cared but didn’t know what to say
• a Mount Druitt memory and the flying fox park breaks
• song of the week I Will Survive and the idea that life starts again after a career ends
• sharing my story publicly without shame and how that opens new doors
• a rough couple of days and being proud that I can cry and feel again
• watching true crime again without nightmares and noticing real PTSD recovery
• looking back to measure growth and find something to be proud of
• being proud of my policing career even though it broke me
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Song of the week:
I will survive by Gloria Gaynor
https://youtu.be/6dYWe1c3OyU?si=whf_V8wphhUYZ5mr
Thought of the week:
The boy, the mole, the fox and the horse by Charlie Macksey
"So much beauty we need to look after"