Roald Dahl’s child-endangering chocolatier is one of the most beloved literary characters, turned into an iconic film character by Gene Wilder. We’ve gotten a Timothée Chalamet prequel that’s better than it should be and a Johnny Depp remake that we don’t need to talk about, but let’s unwrap this weirdo. Sure, he’s immensely problematic, but he also makes some cool candy, and he also happens to be rooted in some real world confectionary history.

Intro contains clips from various films in which Willy Wonka appears.

This episode, we’re joined by our most Santa Claus-like friend, Jared Petty, to discuss the night before Christmas. Like, the actual night, not the poem. We share some of our favorite memories, traditions, weird trivia, and learn a thing or two about the less family friendly ways it’s observed in some other parts of the world.

Intro contains clips from Tenacious D & Sum 41’s “Things I Want,” Bad Santa, Norah Jones’ “Caga Tio,” and Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

This week we’re taking a little off the top, and tipping our hat to the age-old ceremony of lowering one’s ears. Or, in laymen’s terms, getting a haircut. We recount some of our proudest coiffures and worst folicular debacles, and lament the challenges of not knowing what to do with the stuff on top of your head as you grow older.

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Intro contains clips from Paddington 2, “Devil’s Haircut” by Beck and “Cut The Mullet” by Wesley Willis.