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Happy One Year, Shit Apples!!

In this anniversary episode, we roll out the glittery red carpet for our very first annual Shitties Award Ceremony. Yes, it’s as ridiculous as it sounds. We hand out completely unhinged awards to ourselves, relive the chaos, and crown the moments that made us laugh the hardest, cringe the deepest, and text each other “should we cut that?” (We didn’t.)

We rewind to how this whole thing started, the spark, the late night talks, the “should we actually do this?” energy and how far we’ve come. We give flowers where they’re due, especially to Stephanie, because none of this wild, beautiful ride happens without her.

Then, for the first time ever, the woman behind the camera steps into the chair. The mystery. The magic. The steady hand guiding the madness. We finally sit down with the queen of behind-the-scenes and get her perspective on how this all began and what it’s been like helping wrangle three women with microphones and zero filters.

And to close it all out, Shelley delivers a toast that feels like clinking champagne glasses under a disco ball made of good luck and bold dreams. ✨🥂

One year down. Bigger laughs ahead.

Thank you for being part of our orchard.

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This week we take aim at Valentine’s Day — not love itself, just the commercialized circus around it. We’re joined by our special guest Alicia Gayman, owner of Peace Love and Hair Salon in Scottsdale, who shares her jaw-dropping story that started like a fairytale and quickly turned into a full-blown nightmare. What she went through is shocking, eye-opening, and a powerful reminder to trust your gut.

After that, we get into our full Valentine’s Day rant: why we think it’s a manufactured holiday, why a single long-stem rose feels ridiculous, and why going out to dinner on February 14 is overpriced chaos. We break down all the things that make us roll our eyes — the pressure, the expectations, and the performative romance.

But true to our vibe, this isn’t a bash-love episode. Now that Alicia is on the other side of her experience, we ask her what she’s looking for in a partner — and discover that she’s still very much open to love!

It’s honest, funny, a little messy, and surprisingly hopeful — with plenty of side-eye for Cupid along the way.

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This week on “Girl Math Made Me Subscribe,” The Shit Apple Podcast dives headfirst into the wild, slippery waters of subscriptions. From the absolutely necessary to the utterly unhinged, the three of us tally up what we’re paying for, what we forgot we signed up for, and what we will die on a hill defending. Shelley introduces us to her digital hall monitor Rocket Money, which lovingly exposes every charge while she calmly refuses to break up with any of them.

We travel back in time to when subscriptions meant newspapers on your doorstep, magazines in your mailbox, and cassette tapes arriving like little plastic promises of joy. Then we rocket forward to today’s ecosystem of streaming services, fitness apps, sleep trackers, and sneaky “free trials” that pounce on your credit card like a glittery trap.

Along the way, we unpack all the psychological tricks companies use to rope you in, why canceling feels harder than breaking a blood oath, and why auto-renew might be the most chaotic invention of modern life.

Grab your receipts, clutch your wallet, and join us for an episode that will make you laugh, cringe, and maybe finally look at that credit card statement with fresh eyes 💸✨