Hello and welcome to a very special edition of the Say What! Podcast, featuring the prestigious 2026 Cock Pageant Awards — joined by returning guest and man of the moment, Big Nose Neil.

As always, we dive straight into Thoughts of the Week, tackling the real issues — like the best foods for warming your hands and just how long the human body can survive on urine alone. Educational… in our own way.

Big Nose Neil then takes centre stage as he constructs his ultimate woman using nothing but everyday shopping items, while also revealing a slightly concerning passion for lamb breasts. Make of that what you will.

Things take a turn during the Cock Pageant itself, when Big Pappa J and The Notorious FA-TT lock eyes and share what can only be described as one of the most unexpectedly beautiful moments ever captured on the airwaves ❤️❤️❤️

We wrap things up in style with a Star Wars–themed nightclub, somehow rope Henry Cavill into the mix, and uncover exactly what Big Pappa J would do if he had a fifth hand. (Spoiler: nothing sensible.)

So sit back, lower your expectations, and enjoy the chaos....

Hello and welcome to a very special edition of the Say What! Podcast, featuring the prestigious 2026 Cock Pageant Awards — joined by returning guest and man of the moment, Big Nose Neil.

As always, we dive straight into Thoughts of the Week, tackling the real issues — like the best foods for warming your hands and just how long the human body can survive on urine alone. Educational… in our own way.

Big Nose Neil then takes centre stage as he constructs his ultimate woman using nothing but everyday shopping items, while also revealing a slightly concerning passion for lamb breasts. Make of that what you will.

Things take a turn during the Cock Pageant itself, when Big Pappa J and The Notorious FA-TT lock eyes and share what can only be described as one of the most unexpectedly beautiful moments ever captured on the airwaves ❤️❤️❤️

We wrap things up in style with a Star Wars–themed nightclub, somehow rope Henry Cavill into the mix, and uncover exactly what Big Pappa J would do if he had a fifth hand. (Spoiler: nothing sensible.)

So sit back, lower your expectations, and enjoy the chaos.

Hello and welcome to the Say What! Podcast — where, let’s be honest, nobody actually reads these intros anyway.

This episode kicks off with a Mystery Pipe review from a sassy Geordie lady, who may or may not currently have a restraining order involving one very enthusiastic “hole user” — none other than Peter Beardsley. Make of that what you will.

On Thoughts of the Week, we take an intimate look at Big Pappa J’s sausage & beans, alongside yet another baffling tale from the locker room — this time involving the mysterious Doppelgänger cock. Science still can’t explain it.

We introduce a brand-new segment — “What’s in the Shed?” — where The Notorious FA-TT shares a genuinely traumatic allotment bullying story and reveals once and for all why growing sweetcorn is a dangerous game.

Finally, we round things off with Alternative TV Shows, where a group of gold-toothed warriors battle it out with pliers in a brutal reimagining of “Going for Gold.” It’s as classy as it sounds.

We hope you make it past the first four minutes… but if not, we completely understand. Crime Stoppers probably does too.

Love as always,
Big Pappa J & The Notorious FA-TT ❤️

Hello and welcome to the Say What! Podcast — where, let’s be honest, nobody actually reads these intros anyway.

This episode kicks off with a Mystery Pipe review from a sassy Geordie lady, who may or may not currently have a restraining order involving one very enthusiastic “hole user” — none other than Peter Beardsley. Make of that what you will.

On Thoughts of the Week, we take an intimate look at Big Pappa J’s sausage & beans, alongside yet another baffling tale from the locker room — this time involving the mysterious Doppelgänger cock. Science still can’t explain it.

We introduce a brand-new segment — “What’s in the Shed?” — where The Notorious FA-TT shares a genuinely traumatic allotment bullying story and reveals once and for all why growing sweetcorn is a dangerous game.

Finally, we round things off with Alternative TV Shows, where a group of gold-toothed warriors battle it out with pliers in a brutal reimagining of “Going for Gold.” It’s as classy as it sounds.

We hope you make it past the first four minutes… but if not, we completely understand. Crime Stoppers probably does too.

Love as always,
Big Pappa J & The Notorious FA-TT ❤️

Welcome to what is quite possibly the most underrated podcast on the planet — mainly because not enough people are listening to have it taken off the air.

We kick things off with 'facts of the week' and learn how a disabled kid died in an ET outfit

We then attempt to bring a touch of class with a brand-new round: “Hobby Kits.” From microscope sets (used for… very specific observations), to nature kits (also somehow used for the same purpose), and glow-in-the-dark planet stickers paired with a black light — which may or may not reveal more about Big Pappa J’s childhood home than anyone needed to know.

Part two takes a slightly more emotional turn, as Big Pappa J shares a heartfelt story about winning a football competition for an ungrateful child… only to walk away with something far more unexpected — a friendship with two unlikely Wolves fans.

In part three, we dive into Alternate TV Shows, uncovering what Kenneth Williams’ lesser-known relatives might be getting up to, before attempting to round things off with Celebrity Dinner Date.

Unfortunately, the evening takes a dark turn when a greased-up Mini-Me ends up lifeless on the floor, bringing the whole thing to a premature end.

We hope you enjoy this episode as much as we enjoy looking at semen through a microscope as a child

Love as always,Big Pappa J & The Notorious FA-TT ❤️

Welcome to what is quite possibly the most underrated podcast on the planet — mainly because not enough people are listening to have it taken off the air.

We kick things off with 'facts of the week' and learn how a disabled kid died in an ET outfit

We then attempt to bring a touch of class with a brand-new round: “Hobby Kits.” From microscope sets (used for… very specific observations), to nature kits (also somehow used for the same purpose), and glow-in-the-dark planet stickers paired with a black light — which may or may not reveal more about Big Pappa J’s childhood home than anyone needed to know.

Part two takes a slightly more emotional turn, as Big Pappa J shares a heartfelt story about winning a football competition for an ungrateful child… only to walk away with something far more unexpected — a friendship with two unlikely Wolves fans.

In part three, we dive into Alternate TV Shows, uncovering what Kenneth Williams’ lesser-known relatives might be getting up to, before attempting to round things off with Celebrity Dinner Date.

Unfortunately, the evening takes a dark turn when a greased-up Mini-Me ends up lifeless on the floor, bringing the whole thing to a premature end.

We hope you enjoy this episode as much as we enjoy looking at semen through a microscope as a child

Love as always,
Big Pappa J & The Notorious FA-TT ❤️

Welcome back to another episode of A Day Out With… featuring Big Pappa J and The Notorious FA-TT.

Just when you thought this podcast couldn’t possibly sink any lower… we somehow manage to prove you wrong.

On this episode we take out everyone’s favourite gluttonous green ghost from the Ghostbusters universe — Slimer (yes, the one from Ghostbusters and Ghostbusters 2, we did our research). Safely transported in a lead case, we treat the little fella to the ultimate day out at an all-you-can-eat buffet, where he proceeds to completely lose his tiny green mind and devour absolutely everything in sight.

Unfortunately, things take a slightly darker turn. What begins as a wholesome feeding session ends with us lovingly freezing the little green menace and turning him into a refreshing batch of Slimer ice cubes.

As for the state of sobriety during this recording… let’s just say this may represent an all-time low. And if you’ve listened to this podcast before, you’ll know that’s quite an achievement.

Anyway… sit back, lower your expectations, and enjoy the chaos.

Much love,
Big Pappa J & The Notorious FA-TT

Hello and welcome back to another episode of the Say What! Podcast, hosted by Big Pappa J and his loveable sidekick, The Notorious FA-TT.

Yes, it’s back again — Thoughts of the Week — and yes, it’s somehow about food again. This time the Savoy Kid takes centre stage to demonstrate exactly what you can do with a cabbage and an oversized Maris Piper… all beautifully accompanied by the soothing sounds of Boney M played on the recorder. A true culinary and musical masterpiece.

Next up is the brand-new round “Old Man Delight”, where we celebrate the simple pleasures in life: mugs, socks, power tools, and the unmatched joy of blasting a trick-or-treating child’s face with a 160-bar Kärcher jet washer. The little things really do matter.

We round things off with Alternative TV Shows, where things take a bizarre turn. An embryo Pete Best makes a surprise appearance, and we meet Brush — a homeless dog-stroking enthusiast who’s hoping for a fiver. Sadly for him, Big Pappa J has other plans… namely spending it on scratch cards and inevitably falling into a five-year Scratch Card Loop.

We hope you enjoy the episode, and please keep listening — because if there’s one promise we can make, it’s that we absolutely will not be getting any better.

Love and respect as always,
Big Pappa J & The Notorious FA-TT ❤️