What does it look like to face the future after loss—especially when that future feels smaller, uncertain, or even lonely?

In this episode, Jay shares honestly from his own journey as a widower, reflecting on the unique challenges of moving forward without the one you shared life with. From the quiet weight of loneliness to the loss of identity and daily rhythms, this conversation names the reality many feel but struggle to express.

But this episode isn’t just about what’s hard, it’s about what’s still possible.

Jay explores what it means to take small, faithful steps forward… to care for what’s been entrusted to you… and to give yourself permission to dream again. He shares how choosing to live again isn’t a betrayal of love, but an act of trust in God’s ongoing goodness.

You’ll also hear practical and heartfelt thoughts on preparing your loved ones for the future with wisdom, gentleness, and love—without fear or heaviness.

If you’ve ever wondered:

• Can I trust God with what’s left of my life?

• Is it okay to hope, laugh, or dream again?

• How do I move forward without feeling like I’m leaving them behind?

This episode will meet you there.

Find out more about Jay here: https://jaycookingham.com

I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you!

Podcast music by Paul Grimsland

Grief doesn’t just change your life—it reshapes your family.

In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham reflects on how loss impacts the rhythms, roles, and relationships within a family, especially as a widower with adult children.

After losing his wife, Jay found that grief didn’t just take away his partner… it disrupted the shared timeline of raising a family together. What once felt steady now feels, at times, uncertain, fuzzy, and emotionally complex.

From co-parenting to navigating life as the only remaining parent, this episode explores:

• The emotional weight of parenting adult children through grief

• The “relational confusion” that follows loss

• Letting go of control while staying connected

• Learning new ways to love without overstepping

• Trusting God with your children’s journey—and your own

If you’ve ever felt the tension of wanting to help but not knowing how…

or the ache of missing the way your family used to be…

You’re not alone.

Grief changes the dance.

But with God, you can learn new steps.

Find out more about me here: www.jaycookingham.com

I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you!

Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t

The NEXT Podcast music "Song for Christine" is by Paul Grimsland.

“There is a lot to mourn.”

In this deeply personal episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham shares from a recent journal entry—an honest look at what grief continues to uncover over time.

Grief isn’t just about the initial loss. It’s also about the secondary losses that follow—changing memories, shifting relationships, and even the evolving relationship you have with yourself.

Memories don’t always stay the same.

They change shape… and sometimes bring new forms of sadness.

Relationships shift.

Even your sense of identity can feel unsettled.

And in the middle of it all, grief becomes something like a dance—learning new steps without ever fully mastering the old ones.

This episode is a gentle reminder that:

• There is more to grieve than we often expect

• Ongoing grief is not failure, it’s reality

• And you don’t have to fight every emotion that comes

If you’ve ever felt surprised by grief showing up in new ways…

or wondered why it still feels so present…

You’re not doing it wrong. There is just… a lot to mourn.

Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com

I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you!

Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t

What if grief is shaping you… but not defining you?

In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham reflects on a tension he’s been wrestling with even after years of walking through loss, hosting a grief podcast, and helping others navigate sorrow—he doesn’t want to be known as “the grief guy.”

Because grief may be part of his story… but it is not his identity.

Jay shares honestly about what it means to be refined by grief rather than defined by it. He explores the difference between labels and transformation, the sacred role of lament, and the ongoing process of letting go—not of love, but of what holds us back from moving forward.

This episode is a reminder that:

• You are more than what you’ve lost

• Grief is real, necessary, and deeply personal

• And God alone gets to define who you are

If you’ve ever felt like your pain is becoming your identity… this conversation will meet you there—with honesty, hope, and truth.

In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, I share honestly about where I am now — not as a pastor or teacher, but as a man still walking forward after loss.

Grief has reshaped me. It has changed how I see myself, my future, and even my voice. As a widower who loved being married, I wrestle with what it means to still speak about marriage. I grieve not only the loss of my bride, but for the person I might have become with her by my side.

In this episode, I talk about:

• Loss does not disqualify you from having a voice

• Grieving the version of yourself that might have been

• Beauty as God’s invitation back to life.

• Why grief feels like “the fast you never break”

• Why ordinary memories — bananas, coffee, tea — carry sacred weight

• Trusting God’s goodness without requiring something “good” to come from your pain

If you are grieving more than just a person — if you’re grieving identity, future, or the ordinary rhythms of life — I hope this conversation reminds you:

You’re not strange.

You’re not behind.

You’re not doing this wrong.

You are heard.

God is good. He is always good. And He answers out of His goodness.

Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com

I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you!

Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t

Grief doesn’t just take what you love. It changes who you are.

In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham continues the conversation about grief as a rite of passage by stepping into what may be the hardest part of the journey—the middle space. That in-between place where you are no longer who you were, but not yet who you are becoming.

Jay shares honestly about disorientation, about learning to function in a life he didn’t choose after the loss of his bride, Christine, and about the quietness of God in seasons where clarity doesn’t come quickly. He speaks to the tension of wanting a map while discovering that what we truly need is proximity to the Father.

If you’ve felt lost, numb, behind, or unsure of who you are anymore, this episode offers language for that experience. The middle is not wasted space. It is sacred ground where identity is refined, dependence grows deeper, and God meets us daily with just enough grace.

You are not behind. You are in between. And God is still good there.

Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com

I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me a coffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping me grow the podcast. Thank you!

Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t

If grief is a rite of passage, then stripping is part of the journey.

In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham continues the conversation from Episode 53, exploring what grief takes from us—and why that painful undoing is not a sign of failure, but a necessary part of transformation.

Jay speaks candidly about the roles, rhythms, language, and assumptions that grief dismantles after the loss of his bride, Christine. He reflects on the feeling of being “undone,” not as something broken beyond repair, but as evidence that the work is not finished yet.

This episode invites listeners to slow down, resist the urge to rebuild too quickly, and allow God to meet them in the rubble. Grief strips away much, but it cannot strip away God’s presence, love, or redemptive work in our lives.

If you feel disoriented, unfinished, or unsure who you are anymore, this conversation offers permission to engage the process honestly—one step at a time, with God.

Grief is not a problem to fix, a disease to cure, or a sentence to serve. It is a passage to walk through.

In this episode of The NEXT Podcast, Jay Cookingham reflects on grief as a rite of passage—one that is entered, not chosen, and one that changes us whether we’re ready or not. Drawing from his own six-year journey after the loss of his bride, Christine, Jay shares how grief dismantles what was familiar and invites us into a deeper, more honest walk with God.

This conversation explores grief not as something to conquer, but as sacred ground where lament, worship, endurance, and intimacy with God are formed. Jay speaks candidly about what hasn’t worked, what still hurts, and how redemption doesn’t come through answers or explanations—but through the presence of God Himself.

If you feel stuck, behind, exhausted, or unsure why this journey is taking so long, this episode offers a reframing that may bring freedom: you are not failing—you are in passage.

Find out more about me here: https://jaycookingham.com
I’m on @buymeacoffee. If you like, even maybe love my podcast, you can buy me acoffee and support me. It’s a simple way of showing your support and helping megrow the podcast. Thank you!
Here’s the link: buymeacoffee.com/jcdude56t