Sarah Cortez knew she wanted to be a pilot from the age of three, watching out the window of her dad's plane. It took her almost 40 years to act on it. In this episode, Sarah, a longtime sales professional, keynote speaker, and student pilot, joins Steph Lokelani to talk about what it took to finally start flying: clearing her schedule, ignoring the excuses, and pushing through nearly 200 two-week training cycles to earn her private pilot's license.

Sarah shares the story of her dad's skepticism, a helicopter-pilot father with 1,500 skydiving jumps of his own, and how being told she didn't have the focus became the moment she stopped calling flying a "pipe dream." She and Steph swap adventure stories, from flying into the Grand Canyon at dusk to heli-snowboarding in Whistler, and dig into Sarah's work as fundraising chair for Women in Aviation Gem State Chapter, including the upcoming Girls in Aviation Day, on September 19, 2026.

About Sarah Cortez: Meet Sarah Cortez, the "GOALden Girl," a National award-winning sales professional and pilot with a remarkable journey. Moving an incredible 34 times before 5th grade, she developed adaptability and resilience at a young age. With over 25 years of sales and management experience, Sarah's expertise shines through her training company, established in 2018. As a sought-after speaker and trainer, Sarah captivates audiences across the United States at national conferences, sales kick-offs, and company retreats. Her ability to inspire and motivate stems from her relentless tenacity in accomplishing her own GOALS. Beyond her sales career, Sarah's journey of becoming a pilot after the age of 40 exemplifies the power of self-belief, action, and surrounding oneself with remarkable HUMANs. The "GOALDEN GIRL" has formulated a winning approach to help others achieve greatness in their lives. She loves nothing more than helping others accomplish their BIG GOALS.

Key Takeaways: - Action beats readiness. Sarah didn't wait to feel ready, she cleared her schedule and started studying six months after deciding to pursue her pilot's license, despite three kids, a full-time job, and a side business. - A "pipe dream" becomes real the day you stop calling it one. Her dad's doubt, and his honest explanation that she "didn't have the focus," became the turning point that made her commit. - Progress is a cycle, not a straight line. Sarah calls her approach "the art of achievement": take action, reflect, adjust, and take action again. However many cycles it takes. - Representation matters early. Through Girls in Aviation Day, Sarah has watched what happens when young girls see women in flight suits, cockpits, and maintenance bays: "if they can see it, they can be it." - A childhood of constant motion built resilience. Moving 34 times before fifth grade for her father's power line construction work taught Sarah to connect with people quickly and keep those connections going. - Signs can show up anywhere, even a coffee cup. While questioning whether to keep pushing toward her pilot's license, a Starbucks cup reading "stay the course" convinced Sarah she was on the right path. - Sarah's answer to Steph's closing question: at her core, she's a fun-loving, people-loving person who feels most herself in the air, on the snow, and grounded in her faith.

Chapters: 0:00 – Cold open: meeting Sarah and her aviation dream 0:39 – Knowing she wanted to fly since age three 1:03 – Encouraging others to take action on their dreams 1:46 – Turning 40 and deciding "if I'm going to do this, I better start" 2:36 – Behind the yoke for the first time on her own 3:16 – Flight school: instrument rating and commercial training underway 6:59 – What Women in Aviation Gem State Chapter does 9:01 – 100,000 female pilots and counting 12:00 – Her dad's "when horses fly" reaction to her pilot dream 14:26 – Keynote speaking and sales training 15:01 – Girls in Aviation Day: growing from 150 to 250 attendees 17:16 – "If they can see it, they can be it" 18:11 – What flying feels like: total presence, total release 19:55 – A yoga parallel: losing yourself in the moment 20:36 – Flying into the Grand Canyon at dusk 24:03 – Flying into the backcountry: Indian Creek and smoke-filled skies 26:45 – What company would you fly for? 30:00 – Her kids' very different dreams: skiing, ranching, baseball 33:37 – Her dad's helicopter career and 1,500 skydiving jumps 34:39 – Heli-snowboarding in Whistler, BC 39:52 – Favorite Idaho flight: a solo cross-country to Coeur d'Alene 41:24 – Landing a Kodiak backcountry plane at Flying B 42:51 – Would she buy back her dad's old plane? 44:19 – A childhood of 34 moves before fifth grade 50:11 – Flying a Black Hawk during the "boss lift" 53:52 – A shoutout to Women in Aviation founder Sarina 1:02:23 – Closing question 1:03:53 – Outro

Steph Lokelani reunites with Angela Ocheltree, the oldest friend she's had on the podcast to date, for a warm, funny catch-up that doubles as a time capsule. The two met as seventh graders at Lakota Junior High in Federal Way, Washington, in the early '90s through drama club, and they trace the throughline from those teenage years to now.

They swap stories about the theater kids they used to be (Godspell, Macbeth, and one unforgettable paper-mache head), an eerie coincidence involving Angela's adopted mother's birth family and the small Idaho town her parents happened to retire to, and the different roads that led them both into second acts later in life; Angela went back to college at 32 and lived in the dorms, while Steph built a filmmaking career after finishing her degree online through Full Sail University.

Angela, now a sixth grade teacher working toward becoming a school librarian, talks candidly about budget cuts gutting librarian jobs in her district, what she's seeing as phones reshape her classroom, and how drama and choir saved her as a shy, insecure teenager. Both women open up about divorce, starting over, and raising kids the second time around.

About Angela Ocheltree: Angela Ocheltree is an educator and aspiring storyteller based in the Pacific Northwest. With a decade of experience as a middle school teacher and theater co-director, she recently completed her library endorsement to transition into her dream role as a school librarian. Beyond the classroom, Angela is a creative who dabbles in many things; lately it is watercolor and writing. She also loves going to the theater, spending time with her family and friends, and traveling. As a mom of three, she balances her professional life with family adventures, sharing her love for everything from the stage to exploring the PNW. Angela is passionate about education, reading, and bringing curiosity to everyday life.

Key Takeaways: - Reconnecting with an old friend can feel like time never passed. Steph and Angela met at Lakota Junior High in the early '90s through drama club and can still finish each other's stories decades later. - It's never too late to change paths. Angela went back to college at 32, living in the dorms her first year, after years as a pharmacy technician, and became a certified teacher in her mid-30s. - School libraries are quietly disappearing. Angela's district cut librarian positions from every middle and high school, leaving books checked in and out by non-certified staff while she finishes her own library degree. - Being in drama and choir can be life-saving for a shy kid. Angela calls theater the place she "got to be me," crediting teachers - including the choir director who recruited her - with shaping who she became. - Both women treat divorce as a turning point, not a failure. Each describes a first marriage that ended for the right reasons and a second chapter that fits who they've grown into. - Smartphones are reshaping childhood fast. Angela shares what she sees in her sixth grade classroom, from phone pouches to shrinking attention spans, and why she's in no rush to give her kids a phone. - Titles like "mom" and "teacher" don't erase who you are underneath them. Angela's answer to the closing question: at her core, she's someone who chases joy, creativity, and new experiences.

Chapters: 0:00 – Cold open 0:11 – Welcome + meet Angela Ocheltree 0:42 – Sixth grade teacher, future school librarian 0:55 – How they met: Lakota Junior High, Federal Way 2:11 – What got her into drama club 3:02 – The coincidence of her parents landing in Emmett, Idaho 3:35 – Her adopted mom's birth family is from Emmett too 4:37 – "Felony Way": Federal Way's reputation today 5:39 – Wild Waves closing after 50 seasons 11:36 – Starting college at 32, living in the dorms 12:44 – Full Sail, HP, and Steph's own degree 14:46 – Co-directing school plays today 16:59 – Godspell: her favorite show, then and now 23:21 – Wanting to become a school librarian 23:38 – Budget cuts gutting school librarian jobs 30:20 – Teaching the five major world religions in 6th grade 38:49 – Josh: the friend who got her into choir 42:20 – Marriage, infidelity, and starting over 44:16 – Remarried and raising three kids 53:45 – How middle school has changed since the 90s 55:34 – Girls on the Mat: yoga, breathwork, facilitator training 57:34 – Smartphones and shrinking attention spans 59:07 – Phone pouches at school 1:01:49 – Disconnecting on a whitewater rafting trip 1:09:24 – Felony Way revisited and the empty mall 1:12:13 – First jobs: Izzy's Pizza and "pizza surprise" 1:20:09 – Closing question 1:26:20 – Full circle: daughters in theater, back on the stage 1:27:57 – How drama saved her life 1:32:37 – Outro

Sharmaine McWhite joins Steph Lokelani for a raw, funny, and unexpectedly deep conversation that starts with a joke about Social Security numbers and ends up covering nearly everything in between. Sharmaine, a multi-hyphenate creative, real estate agent, and content creator, opens up about growing up in a strict independent Baptist household that took her family from North Carolina to Alaska, where courtship replaced dating, skirts replaced pants, and an evangelist once arranged an introduction to a man she'd never met. She and Steph trade stories about leaving the church they were raised in, the lingering pull to "come back to the family," and what it was like discovering dating, intimacy, and nightlife for the first time in their 30s.

The conversation moves through purity culture and the near-total absence of real sex education, the religion's stance on LGBTQ+ people, and the guilty pleasure of watching Xena and Will & Grace in secret. Sharmaine also talks candidly about her adult ADHD diagnosis, the years she spent calling herself lazy and forgetful before she understood why, and how she's built a life around protecting her passions from ever becoming a job. It's a conversation about faith, boundaries, identity, and the lifelong process of figuring out who you are once the labels come off.

About Sharmaine McWhite

Meet Sharmaine McWhite, a creative at heart who believes life is meant to be lived with both passion and purpose.

An artist first, Sharmaine has also explored the worlds of modeling and acting, always looking for new ways to tell stories and express creativity. Professionally, she wears two hats as an Office Manager and Realtor, where she enjoys building relationships, solving problems, and helping others navigate life's biggest milestones.

A proud Treasure Valley resident for more than 20 years, she shares life with her partner, their four cats, and their blended family of three incredible kids. She considers herself spiritual rather than religious and values authenticity, personal growth, kindness, and meaningful connections.

Whether she's creating art, helping clients, or simply sharing pieces of her journey, Sharmaine hopes to inspire others to embrace every part of who they are.

Key Takeaways - Don't turn your passion into your job. Sharmaine keeps her artwork unmonetized on purpose. Once something becomes how you pay the bills, she argues, it stops being a passion. - Purpose doesn't have to be your career. Sharmaine defines her own purpose simply as living a good life and being happy, pushing back on the cultural pressure to find purpose through work. - Leaving a high-control religion doesn't mean losing your family. Both women describe staying close to parents who remain devout, and the ongoing tension of being told to "come back to the family." - Purity culture left both guests without real sex education - Song of Solomon and secretly-watched TV were their main exposure to the subject growing up. - A boundary is your responsibility, not a demand that someone else change. Sharmaine's framework: decide in advance how you'll respond if the behavior continues, and follow through. - An adult ADHD diagnosis reframed years of self-blame. Sharmaine talks about being called lazy and forgetful long before she understood the dopamine and working-memory science behind it. - Change is core to identity.

Chapters 0:00 – Cold open: the Social Security number game 3:49 – Welcome to The Essence of You + how they met 5:05 – Defining passion vs. purpose 7:33 – "Don't make your passion your job" — the painting she gave away 10:02 – Content creation as the day job, filmmaking as the passion 12:03 – Leaving religion: from North Carolina to Alaska 14:09 – Strict rules: skirts only, no shoulders, no dating 16:21 – "It was a cult": courtship, control, and the Duggars comparison 17:31 – Homeschooling, undiagnosed ADHD, and being the only sibling to graduate 19:55 – An evangelist arranges an introduction to a stranger 22:18 – Confronting race within the religion 24:20 – The Valentine's gifts that crossed a boundary 26:50 – Making her dad end the relationship for her 27:54 – Moving out and starting over at 26 29:29 – The theological question that cracked her faith 33:12 – Steph's own exit from evangelical Christianity 34:03 – "Come back to the family" - the ongoing pull 36:04 – Losing her virginity at 31 and discovering her 30s 38:56 – "This is none of your business" - confronting her parents 41:27 – What the religion (and her family) believes about LGBTQ+ people 44:57 – Purity culture, no sex ed, and Song of Solomon in secret 48:03 – Xena, Will & Grace, and secretly loving queer media 51:00 – Leaving sales, open relationships, and craving variety 53:01 – Getting an ADHD diagnosis as an adult 58:26 – Called "lazy" her whole life 1:03:42 – Closing question 1:08:23 – Outro

"You can't be triggered if you're not cocked." That's the kind of line Nichole Stull drops mid-conversation - half punchline, half life philosophy. In this episode, Steph sits down with improv artist and filmmaker Nichole Stull, who's spent decades shaping the visual world of indie film and TV (including the demon-driven color palette of "259") while also teaching storytelling and applied improv alongside her husband Jared for the last 25 years.

The conversation moves fast and goes deep. Nichole breaks down the "Story Spine," the improv-born storytelling framework Pixar built its scripts on, and why an alien can absolutely show up in a Western - as long as you've earned it. She talks about running her kids' school book fair for 13 years and how she went from devouring every Sweet Valley High book in existence to being a member of an early-2000s online Twilight book club. Get this: with Stephenie Meyer posting in it!

From there, Steph and Nichole don't shy away from harder territory: library censorship, what kids actually have access to online, and a remarkably candid conversation about pornography, intimacy, and the industry behind it. Nichole shares how she talks to her five kids, ages 7 to 22, about sex, alcohol, and modesty without ever making any of it feel forbidden.

The back half turns personal. Nichole tells the story of a devastating junior high year, a friend's sudden death, and the summer she decided who she wanted to be walking into high school. It's a story about identity and reinvention that still shapes how she raises her own kids today. It's a masterclass in reframing trauma, taking responsibility for your own triggers, and understanding that every one of us, just by moving through life, is going to make ripples.

The episode closes with one final question: when you strip away every label and title, who are you at your core? Nichole's answer, rooted in her LDS faith and years of internal work, redefines the difference between pride and humility. It might even change how you think about your own worth.

About Nichole Stull:

Nichole believes that every human on the planet would benefit from improv, because life is improvised and improv teaches us all how to react with love, laughter, forward motion, and purpose. Nichole has been teaching and using improv for performance, leadership, team development, and group connection for 25 years. As a speaker, trainer, and facilitator, Nichole loves helping business owners, community leaders, youth, and families find common ground, fun, and deliberate action to strengthen bonds and purpose. Nichole is also an actor, writer, director, and filmmaker who specializes in storytelling as a way to connect humans. She is fortunate to partner in business and life with her husband, Jared, and their five kids who are almost always amazing. In the last few years Nichole has taken big action to be pro-active in cancer prevention and feels passionately about patients getting all the info they need clearly, concisely, and completely to make choices confidently.

Key Takeaways:

- The "Story Spine" framework (used by Pixar) can turn any idea into a compelling story: establish the normal, introduce a change, and show how each response builds until a new normal is reached. - A story can absolutely break its own rules, you just have to earn it. Set the stage before you introduce the unexpected. - What a story "means" is shaped as much by the audience's life experience as by the storyteller's intent. - Trigger warnings have a place, but no one else is responsible for your internal reaction; that's inner work only you can do. - You can't move through the world without creating ripples. Being afraid of your own impact isn't humility, it's fear. - Pride and humility aren't opposites. The real opposite of pride is self-hate, while humility is holding your own value and everyone else's at the same time. - Every one of us carries trauma, even the moments that feel "normal" in hindsight. What matters is how we choose to tell the story afterward.

Chapters:

00:00 - Behind the Scenes: Costume, Color & the Craft of Indie Filmmaking 07:21 - The Story Spine: Storytelling Tools from Improv to Pixar 19:02 - The Book Fair, Reluctant Readers & "Beware the Anti-Reader" 23:34 - Harry Potter, Twilight & a Surprise Book Club with Stephenie Meyer 32:24 - Library Censorship and Kids' Access to Information 35:56 - A Frank Conversation on Pornography and Intimacy 42:02 - Raising Teens: Honest Talks About Sex, Alcohol & Choices 45:40 - Trigger Warnings and Owning Your Own Reactions 51:58 - The Swimming Pool Analogy: Permission to Make Ripples 58:52 - Everyone Has Trauma. It's How We Tell the Story 1:01:12 - Nichole's Turning Point: Loneliness, Loss & Choosing Who to Become 1:10:04 - What We Choose to Put Out Into the World 1:12:21 - Final Question

Art Burns spent years in New York's high-pressure advertising world before addiction and burnout brought him to his knees, and to mindfulness. Today he's a certified mindfulness meditation teacher and founder of Alicia's Angels, a nonprofit bringing guided meditation, self-compassion coaching, and community support directly into chemotherapy infusion centers.

In this conversation, Art shares the story of Alicia, the client whose journey inspired the organization's name, and unpacks how mindfulness helps cancer patients and their families soften anger into acceptance, release the "cancer as identity" trap, and find beauty even in life's hardest moments. Steph and Art talk honestly about supporting loved ones through illness, the neuroscience behind rewiring the brain through practice, and why real presence matters more than having the "right" words.

Whether you're navigating a diagnosis, supporting someone who is, or just want practical tools for showing up more fully in your own life, this episode offers both heart and hard science.

Learn more about Alicia's Angels: https://aliciasangels.com/

ABOUT ART BURNS:

As a certified mindfulness meditation teacher, Art draws upon his traditional Catholic upbringing, combined with his extensive studies in the Eastern philosophies of Taoism, Hinduism, and Buddhism, to spiritually connect with people from every background. Through the language of their religious and cultural experience, Art helps people understand the universal laws of spirituality to help bring them to a place of physical and emotional wellbeing. Art resides in Colorado with three cats.

🔑 KEY TAKEAWAYS

- Alicia's Angels brings free mindfulness meditation, self-compassion coaching, and community into chemotherapy centers and virtual sessions for patients, families, and caregivers. - A cancer diagnosis doesn't just affect the patient, it ripples through family members, friends, and coworkers in ways that are easy to miss. - The most helpful thing you can offer someone facing illness isn't advice or errands, it's honest, judgment-free presence and active listening. - Mindfulness isn't about controlling your thoughts; it's about noticing when your attention wanders and gently returning, it's a "muscle" you build with practice. - Neuroplasticity research shows consistent meditation practice measurably changes brain activity, even outside of meditation itself. - Self-compassion follows a simple three-step practice: acknowledge the struggle, remember you're not alone in it, then offer yourself comfort. - A diagnosis (or any role we play) doesn't have to become our whole identity, it is one thread in a larger tapestry.

⏱️ CHAPTERS:

00:00 - Cold Open: Meet Art Burns & Alicia's Angels 00:29 - The Story Behind Alicia's Angels 05:53 - Inside the Program: Meditation, Coaching & Community 08:52- How a Cancer Diagnosis Ripples Through the Family 16:48 - What to Say (and Not Say) to Someone with Cancer 20:23 - From Advertising Burnout to a Mindfulness Practice 31:07 - When Illness Becomes Your Identity 37:05 - The Power of Presence Without Judgment 44:52 - Alicia's Words: From Anger to Compassion 48:02 - The Self-Compassion Practice 53:29 - The Neuroscience of a Rewired Brain 57:03 - Small Daily Practices That Change Everything 1:03:01 - Judgment, Traffic Jams & Seeing the Beauty in What Is 1:08:28 - Closing Question: Who Are You at Your Core?