You earned your place in law school or at a law firm. So why does it still feel like someone might discover a mistake? Former litigator and now counsellor, Bena Stock, joins Susan Van Dyke and Johanna Mills to talk about the confidence gap, perfectionism and the habits that make anxiety louder. Bena brings 24 years of litigation experience and practical tools for the moments when your inner critic starts drafting its own factum.

What law students can take into practice:
• Treat a mistake as information. Tell the right person promptly, help fix it, and ask what you can learn.
• Catch the familiar mental route from one piece of criticism to “I do not belong here.” Check the evidence before you accept that story.
• Write down one thing you did well each day and why. Keep kind feedback in a folder you can revisit on a difficult day.
• Do not wait for a busy senior lawyer to notice every win. Share your contribution clearly.
• Before a difficult ask, name the facts, your thoughts, your feelings and what you need. Choose the right person and time, then agree when to check back.

The goal is excellent work and steady learning, not a flawless performance that keeps you from starting.

Lawyer Launcher links:
Instagram: https://instagram.com/lawyerlauncher/
TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@lawyerlauncher/
YouTube: https://youtube.com/@LawyerLauncher-BTB/
LinkedIn: https://linkedin.com/in/susanpvandyke/

Chapters:

00:00 Bridging the confidence gap
02:43 Bena’s early career and imposter syndrome
05:01 Why success can feel like luck
05:59 The perfectionism trap
10:53 What research says about mistakes
13:38 Choosing excellence over perfection
15:51 How to own a mistake at work
18:17 Building a growth mindset
21:19 “Cow paths” and anxious thinking patterns
27:04 Countering negativity bias with visualization
28:32 Record your wins and keep a kudos folder
32:02 The tiara syndrome: making your work visible
34:14 Using positive self-talk under pressure
35:44 Asking for what you want
40:08 A framework for difficult conversations
45:46 Debrief: the cost of avoiding risks
48:53 Recovering from mistakes
51:08 Finding a human connection at work
53:47 Final takeaways