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In this week’s episode of House of H.E.R i’m doing something a little different my first ever solo episode.

I answer the questions i get asked the most, the ones women whisper to themselves at 1am but don’t always feel brave enough to say out loud.

Why do i still miss him?
Why do i feel guilty for “ruining his life”?
Why do i feel worse after leaving?
Is it intuition… or is it trauma?

Why do i feel embarrassed about what i tolerated?
Does it actually get better?

We talk about trauma bonds, nervous system crashes, shame, self-blame and the reality of healing after abuse especially the messy middle that nobody prepares you for.

I share honestly about what helped me, what didn’t, the things that made the biggest difference in my healing, and why feeling relief and grief at the same time is completely normal.

If your mind has been racing lately and you’ve been questioning yourself, this episode is here to remind you that what you’re feeling makes sense.

Trigger Warning

This episode contains discussion of domestic abuse, coercive control, physical violence, trauma bonding, suicide, and mental health.

If you need support

If you’re struggling right now or something in this episode has brought things up for you, you are not alone and help is available.

UK

Samaritans
Call 116 123 (free, 24/7)
https://www.samaritans.org

National Domestic Abuse Helpline (Refuge)
Call 0808 2000 247
https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk

Women’s Aid
https://www.womensaid.org.uk

The Survivors’ Handbook (Women’s Aid)
If you’re not sure if your relationship is healthy, worried about someone else, or need guidance:
https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/the-survivors-handbook/

Clare’s Law
Apply to find out if a current or ex-partner has a history of abuse and may pose a risk:

House of H.E.R. is a space for women who have lived through abuse, trauma, and relationships that broke them. This podcast exists to tell the truth, raise awareness around domestic abuse, and remind you that you are not alone in what you’re healing from.

Follow @houseofher__ and my personal account @holliedowdingx on Instagram and please share this episode with a woman who might need it 🥀