FIRST THINGS FIRST: WE ARE NOT FREE FROM FUCK MANSION!!!! I REPEAT, THERE HAS BEEN NO ESCAPE FROM FUCK MANSION!!!!!!!! GET BACK IN THERE JAMES HURLEY YOU POUTING LITTLE SLUT!!!!!!!!!

Anyway, Windom Earle decided just the one chess-based high-concept fucked up clue delivery system wasn’t enough, so he sent pieces of his dead wife’s wedding dress to a bunch of cities that make a big C on a map. He’s still doing the chess thing though, which Dale deals with by contracting Pete, who it turns out has secretly been a chess genius the whole time? But other important Earle news: he’s really into playing the flute now? And has decided to keep Leo as a boy pet. Also he’s giving some message to Donna, Audrey, and Shelley, and leaves a spooky death mask for Dale but that’s less important.

Meanwhile: Hank is getting sent back to the slammer for shooting Leo. Nadine invents polyamory when she walks in on Ed and Norma in the afterglow. The cops suspect Josie probably shot that guy. But Catherine seems ready to sell Josie to Thomas Echkardt as I guess a sex slave, in what continues to be the worst plotline on the show. And last but not least, Audrey, Jerry, and Jacoby bring Ben back from civil war land by having him win the civil war for the South ????????????

⁂

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• Sadie’s grandma Claire, and birds
• BirdNote
• The Fall (2006)
• Ribbon Skirt – Bite Down
• “The Cohost Sheev Palpatine Pivot! Post”
• Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
• The First Wives Club (1996)
• The “wrow” vine
• Cliff Blazinksi’s dumb Bioshock: Infinite Roger Ebert death post lol
• Hundreds of Beavers (2022)

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Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Mary Chan at Organized Sound Productions

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A pretty bad episode of Twin Peaks makes for a killer episode of TS TV. Coop spends a lot of time telling us about how Earle is so epic and twisted. Leo becomes a slasher villain for a scene and then runs off into the woods like Frankenstein's monster. Ben is still doing the civil war. The “old cranky mayor who is mad his brother died from f***ing this preternaturally hot woman” plotline resolves in the most insane way imaginable. Finally, Lily forgets the mill burned down and Sadie doesn't correct me– I mean her? What gives, Sadie??

⁂

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• Jackson Galaxy
• Mount Eerie
• Xiu Xiu
• Castration Movie
• I Saw the TV Glow (check out our episode on it!)
• Reason Over Passion (film)
• Reason Over Passion (quilt)
• Joyce Wieland’s “What They Do at Sunrise”
• Sherilyn Fenn’s Instagram account
• “The dogshit Obi-Wan Kenobi show”
• Jeffrey Marsh (evil Twin Peaks character)
• Jeffrey Marsh (2010s nonbinary influencer)

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Lily

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Coop gets the lowdown from Major Briggs on his space spirit journey, and learns of some pretty rad visions and not too much else. Then he and Denise initiate Operation Boymoder to snag the nefarious Canadians, with a TS Gambit in the back pocket for when Ernie's profuse sweat makes things go south.

Meanwhile: Dick and Andy launch their own investigation into whether Little Nicky is the devil from da bible. Ed and Norma MAKE OUT!!!!!! Then Hank beats Ed up!! Then Nadine beats Hank up!!!!!!!! Ben Horne is all in on the civil war. Harry continues to be kinda gross and useless to Josie. LEO WAKES UP!! And in Fuck Mansion James is…getting played…. on some Lannister twins shit????? And Windom Earle sends his next move…….in the form of MURDER!!!!!

⁂

Support the show on Patreon for early access and exclusive movie discussion episodes

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• Universal Language (2024)
• La Chimera (2023)
• The Brutalist (2024)
• I Saw the TV Glow (2024)
• The Twentieth Century (2023) (and its bizarre wikipedia article LOL)
• Lily’s notes on vanishing Video
• El Ghourabaa
• Leila Marshy – My Thievery of the People
• Super Mario Odyssey
• Xiu Xiu: The Sent Down Girl (1998)
• wendy carlos boymoding video
• The Straight Story (1999)
• Jonni Peppers' movies Wasteland (2019) and Barber Westchester (2021)

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Mary Chan at Organized Sound Productions

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dale decides to buy a house in Twin Peaks, and settles on the insanely cursed Dead Dog Farm. But oh mon dieu…. there was a cocaine deal done right there?? And they left their coke lying around and it could clear his name !!!! What a deus ex machina! The only thing crazier would be if Garland Briggs reappeared in the middle of the night wearing a pilot’s outfit! Now let me take a big sip of this water….

Meanwhile: old newspaperman Dougie Milford dies from a heart attack from fucking too good. His brother wants to press charges but all the boys in town are too enamored with his newlywed widow Lana so they act out a renaissance painting of fawning over her, to Lucy’s chagrin. Nadine joins the wrestling team and nearly kills Mike the snake. James continues to get drawn deeper into his bizarre softcore porn/gothic novel subplot. Audrey has a shockingly bisexual reaction to meeting Denise. Ed has a new domino??? And last but not least: Andy and Dick Tremayne become convinced that Little Nicky IS the devil from the bible!!!!

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CONTENT WARNINGS FOR NEXT EPISODE: I have covid so I can’t record the next episode content warning without sounding like a Ghoul but it’s basically just the show continues to be gross to Josie and the specter of Leo’s violence arises. Usual Twin Peaks fare otherwise!

⁂

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• Samuel Delany – Dhalgren
• Moby Dick
• Joyce Wieland
• Fiona Apple – Fetch The Bolt Cutters
• Dionne Brand – Thirty
• David Guetta Ends Racism (note this is not the original song he actually dropped but the original is not much better tbh)
• Lust, Caution (2007) (NOT Lust, Passion I said it wrong lol)

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Sadie

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

TS Denise Bryson, FBI top dog, sashays into Twin Peaks to harsh-but-fairly investigate Cooper's case, and get in a lil dancing on the side. Garland's disappearance might have something to do with the Black and White Lodges. Nadine has the hots for Mike The Snake which gets her recruited into the wrestling team. James rides his big dumb motorcycle directly into softcore 🌽 (sorry, don't want this episode to get blocked). Andy and Dick Tremayne’s dad competition is complicated by the fact that Dick’s “Happy Helping Hand” foster boy loves Looney Toons antics and pranks. Hank dumps Ben Horne, who gets a bit loopy about it. Statler gets married even though Waldorf doesn’t like it. And Josie’s back! Unfortunately, the show puts her in the worst subplot of all time.

⁂

Support the show on Patreon for early access and exclusive movie discussion episodes

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

1000xResist

Abnormal Mapping’s episode about 1000xResist

Lorelei and the Laser Eyes

Wild at Heart

Movie Recs by Lex

Phil Elverum (and his album Night Palace as Mount Eerie)

Kentucky Route Zero

Xiu Xiu Plays the Music of Twin Peaks

Gilmore Girls

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Lily

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The show opens with an offputtingly serene Leland funeral sequence, where we also learn that Dwayne and Dougie Milford, the mayor and the publisher of the local newspaper, are brothers and angry at each other?

Coop is very sad to have to say goodbye to Twin Peaks, but duty calls and he’s off to do FBI stuff….. or is he??? Turns out he’s under investigation, sponsored by Jean Renault and the dastardly RCMP! To take the edge off, he goes fishing with Garland Briggs, who…disappears?!

Meanwhile: Jacoby, Catherine, and Josie all reappear with varying degrees of explanation, Nadine is the best, most throwingest cheerleader Twin Peaks High has ever seen, Andy and Dick’s dad contest begins, Bobby has a new get rich quick scheme but gets distracted by getting his dick sucked, Norma’s mom is MT Wentz, and her husband is talked by Hank and Jean into doing CyberCrime.

⁂

Support the show on Patreon for early access and exclusive movie discussion episodes

Follow the show on Bluesky

Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• The death of David Lynch :( (and also like all of his movies)
• Lily’s really good DIY HRT video
• Anne Anlin Cheng – “Ornamentalism”
• Roland Barthes’ idea of the “punctum” in photography
• you bitches can't even spell prague
• stranger things – the lost sister, which DOES EXIST!!

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Mary Chan at Organized Sound Productions

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

It’s another Big Episode! It starts with Dale announcing He Will Find The Killer Today, and the boys telling to do a vision quest about it, as they all turn to the camera and say what the episode will be. He investigates the mysterious Mrs. Tremond with Donna’s help, but it turns out she maybe never existed? But the new Mrs. Tremond gives him a page of Laura’s diary where she foresaw her death after having the same dream Dale had way back in episode 2. Inspired by this, Dale talks to MIKE, who reminds him of his ring he gave to the Giant. This inspires him to gather all the men in town at the roadhouse, including Leland, who would have gotten away with killing Donna if it weren’t for that meddling Coop. At the roadhouse, the Giant-attendant waiter guy gives him the final Gum Clue he needs to remember the part of the dream where Laura told him that her father killed her.

Coop pulls off the “lawyer’s gambit” to get Leland in a jail cell, where he immediately goes full BOB sicko mode, lore dumps, and kills himself/is killed by BOB. He’s wet when he dies because of Dick Tremayne’s gay ass smoking habit.

Finally, the boys ruminate on how the patriarchy is messed up, man, and how maybe BOB is an owl now.

Don’t worry though, we had some time for B-plot! James proposes to Donna but then rides off into the sunset to chase true dream of sulking about women forever. Lucy is keeping the baby and has a Father Competition planned for Dick and Andy. And Catherine reveals herself to certified foot freak Ben Horne, who signs everything away to her for another chance at those toes.

⁂

Support the show on Patreon for early access and exclusive movie discussion episodes

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• Nosferatu (2024)
• Memento Mori (1999)
• Rise of the Golden Idol
• Tunic (the 2022 videogame not the loose-fitting garment or surcoat)

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Mary Chan at Organized Sound Productions2

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Around the town: Bobby has a new dumbass get rich quick scheme: blackmail! Norma's mom is in town, with her new husband, Ernie “The Professor” Niles, who it turns out Hank knows from prison. Jerry is doing a horrendous job as Ben’s lawyer, but at least the brothers can reminisce about Louise Dombrowski’s sexy flashlight dance. His day gets even worse when Pete, now in sicko mode, shows up to deliver a recorded extortion from Catherine. Lucy is back with her sister, Gwen, and Gwen’s baby, as the show keeps the “is Andy a father or not” plotline ricocheting between yes and no.

Meanwhile, Coop continues his prodigious taking L’s streak, failing to apprehend Leland at every opportunity. He’s changed his mind about Ben being the killer after Ben fails MIKE’s BOB detector test, but Harry insists on charging him based on the hard evidence, not the dreams. He gets a visit from Audrey who wants to ask if her father is the killer and assure Coop that she’s still a virgin, but is interrupted by Coop hearing that Maddy has been found on a beach, dead, wrapped in plastic.

⁂

Support the show on Patreon for early access and exclusive movie discussion episodes

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Questions? Comments? Email us at hellotstv@gmail.com and we may respond in a future episode!

⁂

Things mentioned:

• imma keep it with you special agent dale cooper your belief in the goodness of america makes you unable to ever truly fix the evil at the heart of america
• Donna Harraway – “Cyborg Manifesto”, also “Situated Knowledges: The Science Question in Feminism and the Privilege of Partial Perspective”
• me? gongaga
• Infernal Affairs (2002)
• Tampopo (1985)
• Morn from Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
• 1 day blinding soup

⁂

Find Sadie:

• Bluesky
• Letterboxd

Find Lily:

• YouTube
• Bluesky
• Letterboxd
• Instagram

⁂

Music by Jamie Page

Show art by Mya Fernandes-Giles

This episode edited by Mary Chan at Organized Sound Productions

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.