REED opens the episode irritated by something completely unreasonable: PEOPLE ENJOYING THEMSELVES. Somehow that sends ANT into his appreciation for method acting—which turns into a serious conversation about studying your own performances, watching game tape, and treating podcasting like something you actually have to practice instead of just showing up and talking. Unexpectedly responsible. Don’t worry. It doesn’t last. Because now we’re talking about collaborating with other creators. Then the conversation swerves into the kind of content ANT somehow always finds himself watching. Then people who casually watch porn. Then a Reddit “AM I THE ASSHOLE?” thread. And somehow Boosie on 60 Minutes enters the room. Still following? Because eventually we get to a corrections officer who allegedly managed to lose her job, her dignity, AND end up labeled a sex offender. At this point, a respectable show would probably wrap things up. The Crash Out Bros asks: IS APPLE MAKING IT EASIER TO CHEAT?

THE SUPER CRASH BROS | A REDNECK SUMMER opens with CRASH CONSPIRACIES, where ANT and REED look at Australia’s expanding digital-safety rules and start asking the kind of question that immediately gets them in trouble: HOW FAR AWAY ARE WE FROM SOCIAL-CREDIT-STYLE CONTROL? Then CONTRARIAN VIEWS crashes into American politics. President Trump has proposed a $5,000 “Trump Dividend” for American adults if Republicans retain control of Congress—and ANT and REED immediately start arguing over what you call a campaign-season promise involving five grand. No agreement required. Next up, CONTRARIAN OR NOT brings in Keith Lee praising God—and suddenly the argument becomes less about faith and more about one simple question: CAN YOU PRAISE GOD WITHOUT READING THE ROOM? And because apparently we haven’t crashed hard enough yet…UNPOPULAR OPINION closes the show with Fat Joe defending his use of the N-word.

REED starts the episode ranting about Apple’s latest keynote—which somehow gives ANT a life-changing revelation: Maybe he’s been approaching scamming all wrong. Perfectly normal start. Then the conversation takes the first of several unnecessary left turns. A man dies following penis-enhancement surgery. Now we’re talking about death. Which somehow becomes dating in vain. Then Wembley starts banning influencers, REED took shrooms for the first time, and before anybody can regain control, we’re breaking down the absolutely barbaric opening of the Barbie movie. Still with us? Good. Because somewhere after psychedelics and Barbie, welfare gets a rebrand. And naturally, the only responsible place to go after that is: AI WILL EVENTUALLY TAKE OUT HUMANITY. There is no logical reason these subjects should exist inside the same conversation. That’s why it’s a SIDEBAR.

HOW DID TRAUMA BONDING OVER BEING WELFARE BABIES TURN INTO A MOUNT RUSHMORE OF INTERNET SCAMMERS? That’s a SIDEBAR.

We start with ANT and REED realizing that apparently being raised on government assistance is enough to form an immediate trauma bond. Completely reasonable. Then REED—the self-appointed president, CEO and founding member of the STOVE GOD COOKS FAN CLUB—has to give his official review of Stove God’s appearance on the Joe Budden Podcast. Which naturally turns into a conversation about JBP fandom and the strange relationship people develop with personalities they watch every week. Then ANT remembers he has smoke for NORE and DJ Vlad.

So now we’re arguing about interviews, loyalty, access, media personalities and who gets to tell whose story. Then we check back in on the FAKE 49ERS PLAYER, discover the scam apparently has more chapters than expected, and somehow decide it’s finally time to construct: THE MOUNT RUSHMORE OF SOCIAL MEDIA SCAMMERS. There is absolutely no responsible transition connecting any of this.

Come for the trauma bond. Stay for the SIDEBAR.

THE SUPER CRASH BROS | AFFIRMATIVE ACTION DATING opens with CONTRARIAN VIEWS, as the Crash Bros get into the backlash surrounding Druski’s football CTE sketch and whether modern comedy is being scrutinized to death. Then UNPOPULAR OPINION puts everybody’s childhood on trial: WHO ARE THE WORST TV MOTHERS OF ALL TIME?

Before that argument can settle, CONTRARIAN OR NOT crashes into the main event: ARE WHITE MEN REPARATIONS FOR BLACK WOMEN? That turns into dating, race play, preferences, contradictions, and everybody challenging somebody else’s logic. Finally, CRASH CONSPIRACIES closes the show with a declaration about exactly what kind of summer we’re living through: THE YEAR OF THE SCAMMER.

SIDEBAR 27 —where a simple round of compliments can spiral into murder-suicides, family annihilators, racial controversies, child labor, and a full-blown human-remains scandal before anyone can stop and ask, “Wait…how did we get here?” It starts with Dolly Parton, Tim Curry, and Michael Wright—three legends who played their roles so damn well that we somehow end up revealing which actors we absolutely cannot stand. Then ANT checks REED’S CONSPIRACY THEORIST CARD. That’s when the conversation takes a hard left. First, it’s Lindsay Clancy. Then a Montana murder-suicide. From there, we’re debating family annihilators, watching Target stumble into yet another racial controversy, and listening to REED somehow draft a think piece about child labor while the entire workforce catches strays. And just when it seems like the episode has reached peak chaos, the conversation gets even darker: A FORMER HARVARD MORGUE MANAGER STEALING AND SELLING HUMAN BODY PARTS. Just one deranged conversational detour building on the last until a Hollywood icon somehow leads us to a human-remains black market.

How early is too early to fraternize with coworkers? SIDEBAR 26 starts with doing hoodrat things and somehow turns into REED getting sexually harassed by a mature stud. Then ANT crashes out over 3rd-party delivery couriers, we investigate the Penn State frat cartel, invent things that absolutely should exist but never will, meet Jaden Newman and THE HALFRICANS, and somehow end up discussing what happens when you block your ancestral blessings. How did we get there? IT WAS DEFINITELY THE COFFEE.

N.P.R. has a different meaning around here: N***AS PODDING RECKLESSLY.

Fat Liver Jones and Burban Boy Reed are back with another SIDEBAR, the after-hours conversation where nobody knows where the discussion is going—and that’s the entire point. On THE NPR POD, ANT and REED get into the stigma surrounding HPV before the conversation somehow turns toward white people poverty and the stories that come with growing up broke. Then the fellas react to reports involving three Georgia deputies accused of using Flock license-plate reader cameras for personal purposes, leading to a larger discussion about surveillance, privacy and who has access to the technology watching everybody else. From there, SIDEBAR takes another completely unnecessary detour through some of the dumbest state laws in America before landing in podcast drama as ANT and REED react to QueenzFlip going at Ish from The Joe Budden Podcast. We couldn’t connect these topics if we tried. Thankfully, we didn’t.