Three Southern queers talking about God, life, love, and the pursuit of happiness. We’re so excited to welcome the Reverend Matt O’Rear of Saint Luke Lutheran Church in Atlanta, Georgia, for a conversation filled with faith, laughter, honesty, and plenty of sweet tea and side-eye.

Twenty-five years later, we’re looking back at September 11, 2001—the moment we first heard the news, what we remember most, and how that day forever changed the way we saw the world.

In this episode, we reflect on the fear, grief, confusion, and overwhelming sense of unity that followed 9/11. We talk about how much America has changed over the past 25 years—and the difficult reality that some things have remained exactly the same.

We also honor the queer heroes who stepped forward that day and in the weeks that followed—people whose courage is part of the American story, even when their identities have been overlooked. Their stories remind us that bravery has no political party, patriotism has no sexual orientation, and pride in our country does not belong exclusively to the right.

This is a conversation about memory, loss, courage, division, and what it truly means to be an American. Twenty-five years later, we remember where we were, honor every hero, and ask ourselves: Have we become the country we promised one another we would be?

Have you ever walked into a room and immediately wondered if you needed to turn yourself down a notch?

This week on Sweet Tea & Side Eye, Josh and Dustin are talking about what it means to be told—or simply made to feel—that you’re “too much.” Too loud. Too opinionated. Too dramatic. Too colorful. Too queer. Just… too much.

For a lot of queer people, there can be an unspoken pressure to make ourselves a little smaller, a little quieter, and a little easier for everyone else to digest. But at what point do we stop adjusting ourselves to make other people comfortable?

We’re digging into our own experiences, the times we’ve questioned whether we needed to tone ourselves down, and what we’ve learned about taking up space without apologizing for it. Because maybe being “too much” was never actually the problem. Maybe we were just in rooms that expected less of us.

Of course, it wouldn’t be Sweet Tea & Side Eye without plenty of laughs, questionable opinions, a little Sweet Tea, and some well-deserved Side Eye.

So pour yourself a glass and join us as we ask the question: Too much for who?