In a deeply personal and revealing episode of *Starting Cycles*, I sit down with Andrea who shares her journey of motherhood, self-discovery, and the delicate balancing act between career ambitions and the primal urge to be present for her children. This conversation delves into the challenges of parenting, the pressures of professional life, and the transformative power of embracing imperfection and self-forgiveness.

About the Guest:

Andrea Mendoza is a mother of two, navigating the complexities of balancing a fulfilling career in academia with her profound commitment to being a present and nurturing parent. Through her personal experiences and challenges, Andrea has embarked on a journey of self-discovery, leading her to author children's books that encapsulate life lessons on love, gratitude, and the acceptance of imperfection.

Andrea has mastered the art of adapting empirical research on well-being into concepts suitable for children that serve to lay the foundation for wholeness.

Andreas books are available on Amazon, https://shorturl.at/ahHPV

Key Takeaways:

Motherhood Realizations: Andrea reflects on her transition from career-focused individual to a mother deeply committed to raising her children with presence and love. She shares her struggle with the societal pressures of productivity versus the innate desire to be fully present for her children's formative years.

The Importance of Being Present: Andrea and I discuss the significant impact of parental presence on a child's development and the struggle many parents face in today's fast-paced, productivity-driven society. Andrea's journey highlights the internal conflict between meeting professional expectations and honoring her deep-rooted need to nurture her children.

Embracing Imperfection in Parenting: A key moment in the episode is Andrea's reading of her children's book, “Mommy Makes Mistakes Too”, emphasizing the importance of acknowledging imperfections, practicing self-forgiveness, and teaching children about resilience and understanding through personal example. To learn more about Andrea’s books please visit https://www.wholesomechildrenbooks.com/

Cultural Influences and Societal Pressures: Andrea touches on how cultural background and societal norms shape our perceptions and expectations of parenting. She contrasts her experiences in Ecuador with those in the United States, shedding light on how different environments influence parental roles and the acceptance of motherhood's demands.

The Journey of Self-Growth: Andrea and I both share our paths of personal growth, emphasizing the value of gratitude, the pursuit of happiness beyond materialism, and the necessity of redefining success and fulfillment as parents. Andrea's personal development journey, including her exploration of various self-help and psychological growth avenues, underlines the episode's theme of transformation and discovery.

A Call for Societal Change: The conversation concludes with a powerful call to action for societal change, advocating for a system that supports parenting as a valued and essential role. Andrea and I discuss the need for a societal shift that honors the critical importance of the early years of a child's life and recognizes the invaluable contribution of parents dedicating themselves to this phase.

This episode of *Starting Cycles* serves as a heartfelt reminder of the universal challenges of motherhood, the beauty of embracing our flaws, and the power of presence. Andrea's story is a beacon for all parents wrestling with the dichotomy of personal ambitions and the primal call of parenthood, encouraging a compassionate and forgiving approach to ourselves and our roles as nurturers of the next...

We often know the right thing to do— stay calm during a child's meltdown—but find ourselves struggling in the moment. This episode leverages the groundbreaking insights of Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, Dr. Mona De La Hooke, and Dr. Nassim Taleb to redefine emotions. They're not just feelings but complex signals from our brain indicating our current state of resources given our perception of the environment we are in.

Instead of simply offering more advice on how to stay calm, this episode delves into the precursors to emotional regulation. We aim to build a solid foundation for calmness, moving away from the prevalent approach that focuses solely on reactive strategies.

We'll explore the concept of the 'body budget'—our personal reservoir of energy and how it influences our emotional responses. I'll share strategies to help you maintain a positive balance in your body budget, making it easier to model calmness and understanding in challenging parenting moments. By doing so, we equip ourselves to effectively apply principles from child developmental psychology and initiate cycles of well-being in our families.

Key Takeaways:

1. Emotions as Indicators: Emotions aren't just reactions to external events; they're messages about the state of our body's energy reserves. Understanding this can transform our approach to emotional regulation.

2. Managing the Body Budget: Learn how daily activities like sleep, nutrition, and physical exercise play a critical role in maintaining our emotional balance. I'll discuss practical steps to optimize these areas, ensuring we're well-prepared for the emotional demands of motherhood.

3. Practical Application in Parenting: We learn how the success of staying calm and responding constructively in the moment our child is having a meltdown relies on what we do outside of the moment. This episode teaches you how to build a foundation for emotional regulation, as opposed to giving you advice about emotional regulation.

Remember to subscribe to *Starting Cycles* for more episodes that explore the intersection of positive psychology and motherhood, offering insights, stories, and strategies to foster generational well-being in our families.

This engaging episode features Laura, a mother of two, who delves deep into the complexities and evolving nature of motherhood, work-life balance, and the constant journey towards becoming a "whole person." Throughout the conversation, Laura candidly shares her experiences of transitioning into motherhood, the challenges of managing personal and professional expectations, and the profound impact of vulnerability and realness in societal norms. She emphasizes the importance of being present rather than perfect, acknowledging that motherhood reshapes priorities, identity, and the definition of success.

About the Guest

Laura is introduced as a multifaceted individual navigating the intricate balance between her professional career, personal growth, and her role as a mother to two young children. With a background as a child therapist, Laura offers a unique perspective grounded in her professional expertise and personal journey. She speaks to the transformative power of motherhood on her priorities, self-view, and familial relationships. Laura's story is one of trial, error, and gradual acceptance of the fluid nature of balancing work and family life, striving for presence over perfection.

Key Takeaways

The Evolving Journey of Motherhood: Laura highlights motherhood as a continuous evolution, where adapting to changes in one's children and oneself is key. She stresses that motherhood significantly altered her views on success, balance, and identity.

Challenges of Work-Life Balance: Sharing her struggle with transitioning back to work post-maternity, Laura discusses the guilt and conflict of balancing professional ambitions with the desire to be a present mother. Her journey underscores the importance of flexibility, self-compassion, and the need to redefine societal expectations of working mothers.

Vulnerability and Realness: A recurring theme is the power of vulnerability and the necessity of real conversations about the challenges of motherhood. Laura criticizes the societal inclination for portraying perfection, advocating instead for honesty about the messy, difficult aspects of parenting. She believes this can lead to a more supportive and understanding society.

Presence Over Perfection: Laura's key message is the importance of being present with one's children, rather than striving for an unattainable ideal of perfection. She argues that modeling realness, emotional openness, and resilience in the face of challenges is crucial for both personal fulfillment and teaching valuable life lessons to children.

This episode serves as a reminder of the complexities of motherhood, the unrealistic pressures imposed by societal expectations, and the beauty of embracing the chaotic, yet profoundly rewarding journey of raising children.

Remember to subscribe to *Starting Cycles* for more episodes that explore the intersection of positive psychology and motherhood, offering insights, stories, and strategies to foster generational well-being in our families.

Visit startingcycles.com to learn more